Soul Shine

I had to start another new inspirational notebook (the one on the left is totally full). Here are some goodies that I have added to the new one (orange one, on the right):

“There’s a difference between conversing and broadcasting.”

“Not on one strand are all of life’s jewels strung.” – William Morris

“Happy Lightning – a sense of intense joy and gratitude that strikes all at once.” – Allen Levi

“Beauty is not fact.”

“Life does not need us to get things done.” – Cheri Huber

From the Kelly Corrigan podcast:

“Rename the grind and the grind gets lighter.”

“Once is a incidence, three times is a pattern.”

“Good help rarely announces itself as good help.” (This put me in mind of an unusual person whom my son and his girlfriend recently randomly met. They got “red flags” when she kept telling them that she was a “good person”. My son said to me, “Most good people don’t feel the need to tell you that they are good.”)

All of the rest are Cassandra Tyndall:

“Starve your distractions and feed your purpose.”

“Nothing that arrives on a silver platter lasts forever.”

“Do you just go where the wind takes you? If you keep ending up in familiar places, then you may need to adjust the sails within.”

“Not everyone is going to understand you and not everyone even wants to understand you.”

I’ve spent the last few weeks resetting my nervous system. Throughout this entire year there has been so much build-up and anticipation, with two weddings and a graduation. No wonder why I was having neck issues, I was “wearing my shoulders as earrings,” as my new physical therapist pointed out (and she also pointed out that shoulders do not make for pretty earrings).

I have a text chat with the young ladies in my circle (my daughter, my daughter-in-laws and my youngest son’s girlfriend). We were sharing what the themes of our week had been so far. The overall gist: “You can’t do everything. Take a breath before you proceed and prioritize what is ACTUALLY urgent.” Ladies, you make me proud.

“Age is foolish and forgetful when it underestimates youth.” – J.K. Rowling

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Lessons from Dolls

I mentioned on the blog that I have been buying some of my old toys and dolls from my childhood, from eBay. It’s been a fascinating experience, that has lead to a few research rabbit holes for me (my specialty – pointless rabbit holes). Anyway, I’ve gleaned a few unexpected lessons from this exercise. First lesson, if you think that we, as the world, have one universal beauty standard, it is interesting to note that the Barbie doll (started in 1959) has had literally 100s of different “face molds” since her inception. Avid collectors have names for each of these “molds”. If you look at some of the old molds, (and the big haired Barbies of the 1980s), you fully understand that our societal ideas of beauty change constantly. So, I say, wear your own “mold” and wear it proudly. It’s your mold and it’s one-of-a-kind and it’s beautiful. Second lesson, no matter how much you try to preserve something, it ages. I have purchased some old dolls which people clearly thought, one day, were going to be worth millions of dollars. (Spoiler alert – they mostly aren’t. In fact, I’m sad to report that I have purchased some decades old dolls, still in their pristine boxes with their original price tags intact, for less than the price that was on their bright orange, Kay-Bee price tag, even the ones that had been marked down on clearance) The crazy thing is, you pull out a decades-old toy or a doll from its original packaging, that has clearly been stored and preserved carefully for decades, out of the sunlight, never removed from its box, and yet, the doll is still old. The doll is still fragile. Her limbs are loose, her hair is crunchy, her face glow has faded, and some of her accessories crumble instantly away, in a poof of dust (note to self – pleather, which has been cleverly remarketed in modern times as “vegan leather” does NOT age well at all).

So in the end, I realize that no matter how hard you try to fight it, you’re aging. We’re all aging. So do we really want to live out our lives, carefully, hidden in a box?? If we do this with the idea that we’ll “age better”, I think that’s a farce. Overall lessons from my current obsessive rabbit hole: Own your unique mold proudly (it has a name), love it, and remember it’s beautiful enough that people would try to hold on to it for ages. Also, life is boring and wasted, sitting in a box. No matter how hard you try to preserve yourself, you’re still aging, whether you like it or not, box or no box. And the final important lesson: Don’t get too attached to your assessories (especially if they’re made of pleather) – they turn to dust, just like we do.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Wicked, Installment 5

Hilda: Well, Zelda, you’re looking a little pale, almost like you just saw a ghost. Say what’s with the guy sitting next to you?

Zelda: I don’t know, Hildy. He seems a little handsy . . . and also a little clumsy. I’ve never seen a guy wearing so many bandages.

Hilda: Well, Zelda, he appears to be reaching a little high. You know what they say about getting older . . .

Zelda: Why, Hilda, you dirty old hag, you. (cackle, cackle)

Hilda: I was referring to the fact that you have shrunk with old age, Z.

Zelda: Well, I’ll tell you what I’m not short on, Hilda . . . corny jokes!! Ready, ready?? Why don’t witches wear baseball caps?

Hilda: (sigh)

Zelda: Because there’s no point in it! Get it, get it? Baseball caps don’t have points. Next one, next one . . . . What do you call a witch with chicken pox?

Zelda: An itchy witchy!!!! (cackle, cackle)

****Dear readers, I am sad to report (although you may not feel too sad about this) that this is likely the last installment of the Wicked Chronicles. Hilda’s and Zelda’s facial features are made of metal that you poke into the hard rind of pumpkins. Over the years, the posts on the features have gotten rusty and weak. Several of the back posts have broken off. We’ve had Hilda and Zelda for at least fifteen years and I’ve always appreciated that they kept our pumpkins better intact than had we carved them early, here in hot, humid Florida. I’ve always also appreciated their inspiration for a little Halloween fun on the blog.

RIP – Hilda and Zelda

“Go to hell!” —Billy Butcherson
“Oh, I’ve been there, thank you. I found it quite lovely.” —Winifred Sanderson (quotes from the movie Hocus Pocus)

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Legacy

Our long-term dentist (Dr. C) called me over the weekend. He told me that he is retiring and he has sold his practice to a younger man, whom he feels really good about taking over his practice. Dr. C will continue to consult the new, younger dentist, when asked, but at the age of 66, Dr. C is ready to retire from dentistry. Dr. C asked me to come to his office to have a meeting today with him, to meet the new dentist, and to have any questions answered. Dr. C emphasized that his current, loyal staff (an entire staff whom Dr. C once paid to take on a group trip to Italy) plan to stay on board, which was of vital importance to him. Without a doubt, I am going to the meeting.

My husband and I first met Dr. C in a meeting much like this, about a decade ago, when our former dentist, retired quickly and quietly, as he sold his practice to a private equity firm, much to the surprise of his patients and to his loyal staff. We still had all four kids at home and we felt “left in a lurch” as we searched for a new dentist, in a time when all four of our kids (some still in braces), all still needed to have their wisdom teeth removed. Dr. C required meetings with any new patients coming into his practice, so that he could describe his qualifications, his philosophy, and to answer any questions about his practice. We found this to be unique and maybe even a little curious, but when we sat down with him, we instantly felt impressed and in good hands. Nothing changed about that throughout the years. Dr. C was sort of a “dentistry geek”, always staying up with the latest technology, and happy to show off how his new “gizmos” worked, to anyone who asked. For years, he implored me to get a mouth guard to sleep with at night, insisting that it is teeth grinders like me, breaking teeth like glass, who really keep him in business. And in truthfulness, for a long time, my stubbornness and my refusal to try a mouth guard, I’m pretty sure helped Dr. C buy one or two more gizmos for his practice. And yet, true to his advice, when I finally relented on wearing a mouth guard at night, I have not broken any teeth since. Still, Dr. C never chided me nor shamed me about this. He was never one to force any treatment on his patients, insisting that our bodies were our own business, and we knew best what was right for ourselves. He explained that he was only our trusted, educated advisor. Dr. C treated all our family’s mouths, until each kid grew up and moved to different areas, and now my husband and I are the only two patients left. A family of six brought a lot of business to his practice, but yet, Dr. C still reached out to me this weekend, as a courtesy and a kindness he was extending to all of his longterm patients, and to the new dentist, to make this transition easier for all.

What a complete difference between two dentists, who were undeniably good at their trade, but took two entirely different approaches to retiring, and to leaving their legacies behind! Dr. C has been hinting at retiring for years now. I had long accepted that we did not have another decade of treatments from him. He brought into his practice, a young woman who had recently graduated from dentistry school and spent years, training her and mentoring her with the idea that she would purchase his practice from him, when the time was right for all. His patients and his staff were well aware of this. However, life happens. His protégé got married and started a family and realized that owning and running a busy dentistry practice was not going to work in keeping the balanced life which she was envisioning. Our dentist completely understood this, as a father himself, and so he searched carefully for another competent buyer of his practice.

In contrast, our original dentist had been completely mum on the subject of retirement, so I was as shocked as his staff was, when all of the sudden their practice became part of a nationwide “chain”. Not suprisingly, when the dentist left, the practice fell apart, the staff scattered, and the old dentist office is currently a tax preparation storefront.

When we think of legacy, we often conjure up the statues, and the names on buildings, and the scholarships given by “important” people. But anyone’s true legacy, is not how strangers will “remember” you from a few trinkets (big or small) left behind, but how the people you knew in your daily life will remember you. How you treat living your life, and the people in it, is your true legacy. People feel kindness. People notice and respect integrity and competence. People who live well, inspire others to do the same. In the 1997 movie As Good As It Gets, Jack Nicholson’s character famously tells his love interest, “You make me want to be a better man.” Someone who leaves a great legacy, makes us all want to be better people. Dr. C is not just leaving his practice in the hands of a new dentist. He is leaving his legacy to this dentist. These are very big shoes to fill. Still, I have no doubt, that with the great consideration Dr. C has given to his practice, to his staff and to his patients, he has chosen a solid successor. Without even meeting the new dentist, I am already certain that Dr. C has chosen a replacement to take over his practice, who is inspired to be even better, thanks to Dr. C’s admirable legacy.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Questions on Thoughtfulness

Is “thoughtfulness” an inherent trait or a learned one? Are there inherently thoughtful children that remain that way throughout their lives? Does “thoughtfulness” evolve over time, starting out as less thoughtful, more self-focused in our adolescent and early adult years, peaking as “highly thoughtful” in our middle years because we’ve been through enough life to appreciate when others have been thoughtful with us, and then slowly devolving back into self-absorbtion as we face the ending of our lives and the pains and illnesses that can preoccupy our minds? What is thoughtfulness? Is there one definition? Does thoughtfulness require empathy? Can thoughtfulness coicincide with ultra-ambitiousness? Is thougthfulness rare? Are people in codependent relationships truly thoughtful, or are there manipulatons and expectations involved? Do you expect some kind of reward or adulation for being thoughtful? What is the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for you? What is the most thoughtful thing that you have ever done for someone else? Are women more thoughtful than men? Is this biological or is it conditioned? Does thoughfulness require attentiveness? What are the benefits of being a thoughtful person? What are the downsides of being a thoughtful person? Are people more likely to be thoughtful, or more self-absorbed? Do you think that you are a thoughtful person? Does it matter? Is it possible that you are less thoughtful than you think you are? Can you be thoughtful in some ways and not in others? Did you ever think that someone could ever think so much about thoughtfulness? Okay enough. As my sign above my desk says, “Dear Brain . . . Please Shut Up!”

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Monday’s Musings

+ I saw a sign over the weekend. It said, “Christmas, are you ready for it?” I could feel my stomach tightening and my breath quickening. People seem to love to spread Christmas cheer, and yet also, Christmas fear in equal measure. It’s just not nice. I haven’t even put my Halloween decorations out yet.

+ We went to a baseball game with our son and his girlfriend over the weekend. Other than national anthems, alma mater songs, and maybe a few Christmas carols, there may not be a more unifying song, spanning the generations than, “Take Me Out to the Ballgame!” The song was written in 1908 and the writers/composers had never been to a ballgame before writing the song. It is likely that an avid fan gave them a vivid description of the experience, because they certainly “hit it out of the ballpark.” (groan)

+ Last night, I stayed up reading late into the night. I am paying for it this morning. But it was worth it. There is no more delicious feeling than desperately wanting to read “just one more page” as you continue to fight to keep your eyelids from falling down over your eyes.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Unexpected Interruption

These are quotes which I discovered from readings, from the ancient (and yet, still vitally dynamic) Order of the Rose Quartz Witches (“Cor sentit, lapis tuetur”) :

“There is no better medicine to your own heart than knowing that you have been a truly unexpected blessing to someone else’s life.”

“She unintentionally paid a dear price for fair critique, but in the end, the price was worth its weight in gold, for reputation is always one’s bedrock.”

“If there is enough life flowing through your own veins, you can find life in anything, even in the hardest and plainest of stones.”

“When you don’t have much in your cauldron, you desperately and dramatically wish to show that you have more than is there. Interestingly, when your cauldron is over-flowing, you often try to put a discreet lid on it. Those who have known both conditions, understand this the best.”

“He accepted her rarity and eccentricity, and even more so, totally adored it. It was something that she couldn’t even ever do for herself. Therefore, he owned her heart, forevermore.”

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Smells Like Friday

I haven’t done one of my Friday posts in a really long time. My longtime loyal readers know that back when I wrote the blog on a daily basis, Fridays were devoted to complete frivolity. On Fridays, I would list three of my favorite things, and then eventually, I had to keep it to just one favorite thing (it’s pretty special to reach the level of “favorite” for anything, and so I was quickly running out of favorites). However, since I haven’t written a Favorite Things Friday post in forever, I actually have two favorites to share with you today:

Daily Sparkles Book by Emma Jasper – I purchased this book at another favorite of mine (Buc-ee’s), on the way to helping our daughter move to her new apartment, this past summer. This book is so uplifting. It is divided into seasons, and each section has lists of wonderful things about each season. Here are some examples from the Fall section:

“The reintroduction of a routine after summer.”

“The sweetness of little tiny pumpkins.”

“Eating a lot of the candy you bought for trick or treaters.”

Daily Sparkles is just a lovely reminder that it really is the small things that delight the everyday-ness of your life. I noticed that this lovely book is also available on Amazon.

And speaking of my daughter and of candy, my daughter texted me the other day that she just purchased the best peanut butter cups that she has ever tasted, at Aldi. So naturally, being a peanut butter cup fiend, I made a special trip to Aldi (where I also purchased a darling Halloween wreath) and I purchased two bags of Choceur Peanut Butter Cups. Each 12 ounce bag offers a generous portion of peanut butter cups for only $4.99. So naturally again, I had to purchase two bags (as my husband and I like to say, “I don’t want to lose money on this deal.”) These peanut butter cups are heaven in my mouth. There is absolutely no way that these bags are going to make it through the weekend, and I only bought them yesterday. Yum! Yum! Yum!

Friends, please add your favorites to my comment section. Perhaps a daily sparkle is remembering our favorite things and also why they are our favorite things. Have a fabulous day and an even better weekend!!! I hope you find a new favorite to enjoy!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Thoughts for Thursday

+ I saw a friend from my neighborhood the other day. She called out, “Hi, Doll!” She calls me and all of other her friends “Doll.” I still remember a college friend who always called me and her other friends, “Darlin’ “. (not darling, but Darlin’) Both of these ladies roll out these terms of endearment so easily and naturally. It’s just part of their vernacular. I love it. I wish that I felt more comfortable doing this. It makes me feel pretty special when I am part of the Doll/Darlin’ circle. I don’t particularly like it when anyone calls me “Honey”, though, especially people who are younger than me (which is becoming more and more the majority, sigh). I often wonder how these things come about. Did my friends decide one day, “I think that I am going to call the friends whom I really like, a special term, like “Doll” or “Darlin’ “? Did they try it out carefully on one or two people to see how these people reacted? Did they feel shy or unnatural at first when doing it? Did it roll off of their tongues as easily as it does now? Perhaps the bigger question is, do I think (overthink) too much about things like this? I’m pretty sure that I do, Darlin’. Is it possible that my friends just call everybody Doll/Darlin’ because it’s easy, and you don’t have to worry about screwing up names? It’s possible, Doll.

+ Two of our sons got married this year. Both couples wrote their own vows. I love this change in tradition. It feels so meaningful, personal, emotional and more true to themselves, as a couple. I heard the word “accountable” more than once in this last set of vows. I loved this. I soaked it in. Accountability doesn’t seem to be as prevalent or important these days, as a value people hold in esteem. Trying to find someone or something else to blame, or to sue (where I live, billboards for lawyers are as common as our palm trees), sometimes seems like more of the norm. It’s uncomfortable to hold someone else accountable. It’s hard to hold ourselves accountable. It’s really difficult to accept that sometimes, sh*t just happens and no one’s to blame. The truth is though, it’s only when we own our own parts/actions/reactions in any relationship or situation, that we have the power to do anything about it. Why are we so quick to give our power away? It’s probably because of shame. And that’s a damn shame, because shame doesn’t do good for anybody.

+ Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit (look it up)

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.