world cup Archives - Adulting: Second- Half

Birthday Reflections

Happy Birthday, USA! I was here for our bicentennial. I was five years old. I clearly remember all of the hoopla and all of the “schlock”. I read yesterday about a professor who created a large curation and collection of 1976 bicentennial “schlock”. (there was even a red/white/blue condom which referenced fireworks) He later donated the collection to one of the Ivy League universities, believing it carries important insight into our American culture. As I was reading the article, it occurred to me that this 250th celebration doesn’t seem quite as “in your face” as the 1976 one did. Now this could be because in 1976 I was a young child and everything seems bigger and more incredible when you are little, but I don’t think that is the reason. This year’s July 4th celebrations (other than in our nation’s capital) seem relatively subdued considering the milestone we have reached. But that’s okay. Because, honestly, we’ve gotten something much better than an overload of tacky red, white and blue crap. In a time period, when everyone is weary of divisiveness and politics and fearmongering, we got hundreds of thousands of visitors from all over the world, many with fresh eyes to our country, having never been here before, being perfectly astounded and amazed by what our people and our country have to offer: enormous portions of food and drink, gorgeous nature that goes on and on, friendly, kind people who want to make you feel welcome, air conditioning everywhere and running strong, sunshine, cultures within cultures, can-do optimism, giant trucks and cars, huge arenas and venues . . . . the list goes on and on and on. I keep watching the reels of excited visitors, as my eyes get misty. I’ve always been proud and utterly grateful to be an American, but this surprising reminder from foreigners of the many, many reasons why we are so lucky to be Americans is the best birthday present the USA could ask for – thank you, World Cup!

It also occurred to me yesterday that I will be lucky to reach the USA’s tricentennial. (I am going to have to cut down on my American large portions, if I even want a shot at it) I probably won’t be around to celebrate it, but America will. I have no doubts and the United States will be stronger, and more clear-visioned and more inspirational to the entire world than it ever has been before.

I follow a writer, who is sort of “new age” named Tam Veilleux. I was honestly a little surprised and totally delighted by how she closed out her most recent newsletter. These are her words (I couldn’t agree more nor say it better myself):

“Lastly, because this hits my heart so loudly: Happy Birthday, America. I’m wildly patriotic by nature. Maybe it’s the long line of family members who served in the military. Maybe it’s my deep appreciation for the revolutionary spirit of those who fought for freedom. Though we still have room to grow, I celebrate all that America is…its greatness and its growing pains. It’s home, and I love it deeply.

If you are an American reader, I hope this week finds you reconnecting with what you love about this country. And if you’re reading from elsewhere in the world, thank you for bearing witness to our growing pains and holding space for us as we continue learning how to become better citizens of Earth.

Sending big love and even bigger fireworks!“

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

First Time

Yesterday I read a delightful article that I had trepidations about reading at first. The article was about foreigners visiting the USA for the first time in order to experience the World Cup. It was a collection of social media posts about what their thoughts were about America, now seeing it for the first time. And although I didn’t know what the slant of the article would be at first, thankfully, this was a kind and thoughtful collection of posts. These first-time foreign visitors were thrilled with visiting all-American places like Taco Bell and Wal-Mart and Waffle House. (this reminded my daughter and I about when we were on a flight home from Europe one time, hearing two young European women talking excitedly about trying pancakes for the first time, immediately when they landed in the USA) Some of the posts were about how green and wide-open the visitors found America to be. One German man stated that the forests seemed to go on and on and on. The article’s point was about what a joy it is to get to experience these “first-timers” experiences along with them. It brought some magic back to our ordinary, everyday All-American things. Seeing others delight in what we often take for granted, is perfect timing, with our country’s 250th birthday right around the corner.

There is something so special about experiencing anything for the first time. This is why I am often wary of experiencing the same places or things more than once. The “next time” just never seems to hold the same excitement and awe as the first. You have to adjust your expectations to understand that familiar places, and things, and experiences will often not live up to the hype of your memories when you go to experience them again. However, the best remedy to this, is to bring someone with you, who’s never seen or experienced what you already have, and then delight in their own delight. When you get to look at what has become known or ordinary to you through the fresh eyes of someone else, the vicarious thrill and pride and remembrance is a feeling which is almost as good as any wonderful first-time experience. Their appreciation becomes a renewed appreciation in yourself. In this way, you sharing a special place or experience with a newcomer, becomes a gift to yourself, as well. No wonder why our kindergarten teachers knew that sharing was the most important lesson to impart to us, because sharing is a loving gift that lasts a lifetime for both the recipient and the sharer.

It is also true that excitement begets excitement. When I go somewhere that I have never been, I get giddy, like a kid in a candy store. And I can feel the locals attracted to my happiness and so they often go out of their way to make my experience as amazing as it can be. They have a renewed sense of honor and confidence about what they are offering in their corner of the world. It is my gift to them, to help them to feel this way again about “their stuff and their turf”, and it is their gift to me, to share the best that they have to offer.

It’s so easy to attack and look for the faults in anything. When I look at the list that some of the people visiting were excited about: Wal-Mart, Taco Bell, Waffle House – I can feel a sneer forming on my lips. But it’s not about the places. It’s about experiencing something new like you’ve never seen. It’s interesting to experience almost anything novel, even if you decide it’s not anything you would ever want to experience again.

I hope that we all offer the best that we have to our World Cup visitors. And I hope that they look for the best in us. It is a truth in life that you often see what you look for, and when you look at things with curiosity and enthusiasm and optimism, what you see and what you get, add up to amazing memories that last a lifetime, like the first time a delicious, steaming stack of pancakes was headed your way. And the only real way to experience that feeling again, is to watch someone happily dig into the first pile of pancakes which they have ever tried.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Monday – Funday

My favorite story from the weekend was of the Japanese World Cup soccer fans keeping up their tradition of cleaning up garbage in the stands. They have traditional blue garbage bags that they take out and use to clean up garbage as a sign of respect for taking care of others’ property. The Japanese team members left their locker room absolutely spotless as well, including leaving origami figures and a thank you note to the host country, Qatar. Apparently, this wonderful quality is catching on, and many other teams are following suit. What a wonderful example of courtesy, respect and connection to others! Apparently the worldwide attention that this has brought, has made many Japanese people amused, proud, but also a little embarrassed. This trait of tidiness and respect is something that is so “normalized” in their culture, that they are finding themselves a bit self-conscious to having it be brought to light. I love this. Sometimes wonderful traits of people need to be noticed and emulated, especially when these traits are just part of a person’s being, and not part of an attention grabbing “show.”

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.