inspiration Archives - Page 67 of 79 - Adulting: Second- Half

A Little Bit Psycho

Surround yourself with people who pray for you behind your back .. those are your people, those are your tribe

@TammyAIDip, Twitter

I feel your prayers, my friends. Thank you. Working through the trauma that comes with my youngest son’s epilepsy is a process, but the process feels lighter with the loving and kind energy of prayer and well wishes, moving through it. Again, thank you. I treasure you, my tribe.

“I always like for other kids to know that my kids’ mom is a little bit psycho.” – @emily_tweets, Twitter

I love this tweet. All of my children and their friends know that I have my quirks, and that I usually proudly own my quirks. I think that it is my middle son (the matter-of-factual medical school student) who would most deeply relate to this tweet shown above.

My middle son is reserved. His teachers used to love to accuse him of being shy, but that’s not honestly the case. There is a big difference. My middle son is confident, he just doesn’t care for spectacles. My middle son has a stealth self-containment. In the midst of chaos, he isn’t chaotic, but it turns out that he is often that sneaky instigator of the tumultuous happenings all around him. You know the type.

When my middle son was in elementary school, parents took turns organizing surprise “Fun Friday” activities for his kindergarten class. Now my regular readers know that I love Fridays. Fridays put me in almost a holiday kind of spirit. I get giddy, sometimes even ecstatic, on Fridays. And my closest friends and my family know that, unlike my middle son, I’m not particularly reserved. So on my turn of heading up a Fun Friday for my son’s class, I decided to go all out.

My middle son is an automobile enthusiast. He’s going to be that guy whose garage will always be more pristine, and probably larger than his house. He has loved cars since he could steadily hold one or two brightly colored Matchbox race cars, in his precious little chubby baby fist. He can name the make and model (and probably even the year) of any car he sees, like he is a walking Blue Book. So it was inevitable. I decided that I would go all out with “the car theme” for Fun Friday.

We were living in Charlotte, NC, at the time, and we had friends who worked at NASCAR, so I asked to borrow a racer’s suit. I also borrowed another friend’s motorcycle helmet. That Fun Friday, I proudly promenaded down the hall of the elementary school, donning my race gear, like I was a model on a catwalk. I had bags full of activities and stuff, all related to cars, that we were going to enjoy in his kindergarten class’ Fun Friday. And I, on that particular Friday, wasn’t just wearing a race car suit . . . . I was a race car driver, and a good one. On that day, me and Jesus, had the wheel.

I confidently opened the door of his classroom, where the children were sitting on the floor with each other working on a math activity. I stood in the doorway, hands on my hips, and then I whipped off my heavy helmet with panache. I smiled broadly (and probably in my son’s mind, a tad fanatically), as I eyed him, wondering, with glee, what he thought of my surprise entrance.

My middle son looked at me, eyes widened, and he gasped in horror. He turned to his friend sitting next to him, and in a loud whisper aimed towards his friend’s ear (and anyone else in close proximity), my son firmly pronounced, “Yeah, don’t mind her. She’s a little kooky!”

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Monday Fun-Day

It’s been nice and cool here the last couple of days. (70s is cold weather here) I’m loving it. The sun is smiling sweetly on us, instead of scorching us with the deathrays of Florida summers. It’s honestly like a switch has been flipped. I want to put a proverbial piece of masking tape over that switch with “Do Not Touch” sharpied on the tape. I am feeling hopeful this Monday. I wish the same for you.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

The Overflow

My Bucket is Overflowing! | Peel The Onion

We have a rain barrel that sits solidly underneath a corner of where our roof comes together, creating a small waterfall. During the rainy season, especially, we have to release the plug on it, or else the rain barrel often overflows to the point that I wonder if the poor thing is likely to burst and to break. The rain barrel needs a constant release, in order for it to do its intended job. When the rain barrel is full with stagnant water, it isn’t helping anything. The heavy, full rain barrel starts sinking into the earth, making it impossible to move and it attracts biting mosquitoes and other poisonous pests. In reality, the rain barrel can’t possibly hold it all in. When the rain barrel is full, it just cannot take one more drop of water in. It’s too much to expect of it, to do so.

Sometimes I think that it would be more appropriate to keep the plug of the rain barrel open at all times, so that even on the days in which the rain barrel is overwhelmed by a cascade of water from a big, torrential storm, the rain water can flow through it, and soften and dissipate into the packed Earth below and also evaporate into the ocean of air surrounding it. And when the rain barrel has a big release of what it is holding in, that often turns out to be the best thing for the plants and the shrubs surrounding it. The green life takes the rain barrel’s tears, and they transform them into nurturance for their own growth. And what is really grand, is that after this cycle happens, many times, one can see a beautiful rainbow, right by the rain barrel. This is a frequent experience, because the sunshine always, always comes back. The sunshine dries the rain barrel inside and out. In their own ways and in their own time, both the sunshine and the rain cleanse the rain barrel, so that the rain barrel is always freshly ready and prepared and open, for what it was made to do.

“Allow the power to flow through you. Don’t try to capture it. You wish only to borrow it.” – G.G. Collins

“What comes out of you, doesn’t make you sick; what stays in there does.” – Edith Eger

Quotes about Emotional release (32 quotes)

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Charlie and Milo

This is a picture of Charlie and Milo, twins with Down Syndrome, who are viral on TikTok. This picture gave to me my first, biggest smile of the day. In my experience, people who have Down Syndrome have that ability to make others smile. It seems like the extra chromosome that comes with Down Syndrome, also includes an extra dose of pure joy and happiness. Many, many years ago, I sold college textbooks for a living. One of my professors told me the story about how upset his family was when they learned that their fifth and youngest child had Down Syndrome. At the time, he said, the whole family believed that having a Down Syndrome child was the worst thing that had ever happened to their family. But, as the professor regaled me with many love-filled stories about his family’s adventures with his wonderful youngest son, and the close relationship which the two of them shared, the professor told me emphatically, that their Down Syndrome son was the BEST thing that ever “happened” to his family. (It’s funny how these are the kinds of stories which you never forget in your life. I forget a lot of stuff these days, but stories like these, I never, ever forget.) Here are some facts about Down Syndrome, taking verbatim from DoSomething.org:

Down syndrome (DS) is a genetic condition where a person is born with an extra copy of chromosome 21. This additional genetic material changes the course of development and causes the characteristics we have associated with Down Syndrome.^[1]

The exact cause of the extra chromosome that triggers Down syndrome is unknown.^[2]

One in every 691 babies in the U.S. is born with Down syndrome, making it the most common chromosomal condition.^[3]

There are more than 400,000 people living with Down syndrome in the U.S.^[4]

In 1983, the average life expectancy of a person with Down syndrome was a mere 25-years-old. Today, it’s 60.^[5]

Children and adults with Down syndrome share some common features, but naturally the individuals will more closely resemble their immediate family members.^[6]

Since the 1970s, public schools are required by law to provide a free and appropriate education to children with Down syndrome.^[7]

The likelihood of giving birth to a child with Down syndrome increases with maternal age, however, 80% of babies with Down syndrome are born to women under 35 years of age because this age group gives birth most frequently.^[9]

Roughly 25% of families in the U.S. are affected by Down syndrome.^[10]

While behavior, mental ability, and physical development varies from person to person, many individuals with Down syndrome grow up to hold jobs, live independently, and enjoy normal recreational activities.^[11]

Let’s be like Charlie and Milo today and let our inner joy take the lead with whatever we are doing. Who’s to say that people with Down Syndrome aren’t the wisest people on Earth? What’s wiser than to live in every moment with pure, unadulterated jubilation???

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Broken People

My son and I watched The Guilty with Jake Gyllenhaal the other day. It was a really good movie, underrated in my opinion. I won’t give any spoilers other than one line that really stuck out to me from the movie: “Broken people fix broken people.”

Don’t ever think that you don’t have something to give, because you have problems. Everyone has problems. Showing that you have overcome your problems (or at least, earnestly and honestly working on overcoming your problems) is more helpful to anybody, than pretending that you never had any problems to begin with. (You are only fooling yourself in that regard – people see through “fake” and “social media filtering” quite easily. People aren’t dumb.)

Some of the best friends whom I have ever made in my life, I met in a support group. We spent a lot of time crying together in a circle, passing around the Kleenex, before we made it to the part where we go out to eat and laugh our heads off together, on a frequent basis. These people help me like no others, because they “get it.” All masks are off. We have helped each other on a path of growing and healing and expanding, because the level of empathy and authenticity and our ability to sit with the truth is unmatched. These relationships have made me somewhat intolerant to “superficial.” I don’t have the patience anymore for “pretend.” Real is where it’s at, and the only way I want to be for the rest of my life.

Notice that when people go through the unimaginable, such as what Gabby Petito’s family is going through with the murder of their daughter, they do things such as immediately set up a foundation to help other families to find their missing loved ones. Helping others through what you have been through is cathartic for all parties involved. No one wants to think that the pain that they endure, is in vain. Pain can always be alchemized for some good.

Instead of avoiding your pain and pretending that it doesn’t exist, work through it. Even when you do this, don’t pretend that you have all of the answers. You don’t. Every time when I smugly think that I am now in the phase of my life in which I fully “get it”, as if I am some kind of saint or yogi or something, I’m whammied and humbled. Hard. But with the help of others who have walked a similar path before me, I get back up on my feet, and I try again, and I hope that it is this “getting back up on my feet”, which is what truly helps people, not just myself. I hope that others who are experiencing some of the upsets which I experience, can be inspired and feel hopeful by my path of trying. I hope that however shaky and raw my hands are at times, they are always available to help lift someone else up on this path which we call Life. We are all in this together. You and I are never alone. Broken can be healed.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Monday – Funday

“Be the change you want to find in the cupholder.” – Ozzy (Twitter)

I read recently that it’s fun to leave a dollar on a grocery shelf or in a library book, every once in a while. Whoever finds it will feel lucky, and you can reflect on your anonymous good deed and get a smile out of it, any time you think of it. I recently left a dollar on the jello shelf in my local grocery store. I’m not sure that was the best, thought-out placement for the dollar bill. I don’t know how many people make and eat jello anymore. Maybe the dusty dollar bill is still sitting there, waiting for someone to find it. I hope that whoever finds it, sees it as a sign which they have been waiting for, a sign that means something like, “Things are looking up. Everything is going to be okay. Now go make yourself a nice jello salad.”

“I’m sensitive, not soft. I’ll slap you while I’m crying.” – Madison Ice (Twitter)

I really like this tweet. I think that many sensitive, empathic people are much stronger than anyone ever gives them credit for being. Imagine feeling every sensation and emotion that occurs in life, ten times harder than the average Joe. Imagine noticing every slight nuance and change of energy in every room and every circumstance, like being a human hair trigger. It’s a lot. Sensitive people are actually probably stronger than most people. Remember a silken, spider web is one of the strongest elements on earth. It make look fragile, but it is as strong or stronger than steel. (The tensile strength of steel ranges from 0.2 GPa to 2 GPa, while the tensile strength of some spider silks is about 1 GPa. – reconnectwithnature.org) The next time you are tempted to tell someone whom you perceive to be a sensitive person to “toughen up”, check yourself. “For a highly sensitive person, a drizzle feels like a monsoon.”(anonymous) Sensitive people have survived many, many monsoons in their lives. Have you?

2 Jello Quotes & Sayings with Wallpapers & Posters - Quotes.Pub

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Soul Sunday

Good morning, friends. Welcome to the most lovely, tranquil, peaceful day of the week – a day to just breathe and let go. On Sundays, I devote this blog to poetry. I either write a poem or I share a poem written by another writer. Today’s poem on the blog, is written by an extremely talented, inspiring person named Nightbirde. Nightbirde is a singer who despite getting a “golden buzzer” (from the finicky Simon Cowell, no less), had to drop out of the America’s Got Talent competition due to her battle with cancer. She recently posted the poem that she wrote (seen below) on her Instagram account. The poem is admittedly sad, yet achingly beautiful. Despite writing the poem, Nightbirde also posted a pretty picture of herself, and assured her fans this: “Not gonna die. Don’t worry. . . . . I know I posted kinda of like a little bit of a sad poem about dying, however, Im not dying, I’m doing great, I’m inching forward slowly.”

That’s all that is needed from any of us in our lives: “inching forward slowly“. It doesn’t matter how fast you are going, just keep up the forward motion. It’s not a race, it’s an adventure. Stay aware. Nightbirde also had this to say:

“What a miracle that the pain I’ve walked through can be reworked into beauty that makes people all over the world open their eyes wider.”

That is what I mean by my daily tagline: Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love. Don’t let the pain which you experience, go to waste, nor add to a bigger pile of stinkin’ pain, lying around this earth. We all have pain in our lives. That’s just part of being human. But our pain can be turned to good, in the forms of compassion, empathy, perspective, hope, inspiration, which all come together to form the highest vibration of Love.

Here is Nightbirde’s poem:

A Hero In Flames

I want to die while my heart is still a greenhouse for hope
All my wild dreams as seedlings in egg cartons
Reaching toward the window

I cannot die yellow and hungry
I will not die in sterile air

But I would like to die
While the fireflies are still glowing
Morse coding their poetry for a cynical earth

I would like to die like Joan of Arc
With dignity and urgency and stubbornness
A watercolor portrait in the night
A sight to behold, a hero in flames

Hidden Gifts

My friend mentioned the “hierarchy of pain” the other day. For instance, if you have a major toothache, your chronic sciatica all of the sudden goes into the background. I think this is true of crises, too. Everything that seemed of utmost importance to me about a month ago, are all things that are easily now on the backburner, as we work to get my son settled on some epilepsy medicines that will keep his seizures at bay. When you are in the middle of focusing on an acute crisis, you realize that all of the stuff that you usually gripe over, really doesn’t matter. Nothing is nearly as important as your health and your sanity, and the health and sanity of those whom you love. Everything else is just a plus, but not a must. When things in life are relatively copacetic, that’s when our pesky human nature starts to look for little issues and gripes and annoyances and dramas to stir us up. But when real emergencies are happening, that’s when we realize just how much we complain and worry about so many meaningless trivialities in our lives. Every experience in life, even our worst experiences, have their hidden gifts. The worst experiences force perspective like no other experience can do for us.

Sad Quotes and Quotations: What is Happiness

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Sh#t on Shingles

Turning 50 brings unexpected gifts. Yesterday, I happily received my first shingles vaccine. Having had family members and friends who have gotten the actual shingles virus, and told me (and texted terrifying pictures) of the horrors of the ordeal that still end up in my nightmares (my uncle, a military veteran, who had gone through more health treatments than almost anyone I know, once emphasized to me, that shingles was by far, the worst experience of his life), I had no hesitancy about pulling up my sleeve for this one. I was one of those sheltered, late bloomers who didn’t get the chickenpox until I was in my early twenties. It was a beyond miserable trauma, and plenty enough for a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Since shingles is related to the chickenpox, I’m not taking any chances. When I was 48, I once went into a Walgreens and begged for the vaccine. (I even considered getting a fake ID – ha!) They turned me away. I had to be the magic age of 50.

I like that when you turn 50, you all of the sudden qualify for extra health treatments, like shingles vaccines and colonoscopies. These aren’t spa experiences, of course, but they are a measure of prevention. Telling me to get these procedures done, says to me, “Hey lady, you may becoming a little high-mileage, but you’re a classic. You are worth maintaining. We want you for the long haul.”

So, truthfully my arm hurts a lot, I’m a little achy all over, and I didn’t sleep very well last night, but it was worth it. I feel valued – by myself, and by my community. Sometimes, tender, loving care comes in all sorts of strange forms, but care is care. And care feels good.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Reading and Writing and Rest

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

(credit: Rex Masters Twitter)

This made me giggle and completely resonated with me on my Twitter feed today:

“I’m at the age where the only artists I know on music award shows are the lifetime achievement award winners” – Dr. William, Twitter

And this one is the truth:

“When you are overthinking, WRITE. When you are under-thinking, READ.” – Positive Call, Twitter

I would add: “And when you are exhausted from all kinds of thinking, REST.”

This is my current state of being. I need rest. May this be a restful time for all of us. A little rest never hurt anybody.