Tag: empty nest

Soul Sunday

Good morning. Welcome to poetry day on the blog. My friend, who is an English teacher, texted this poem (shown below) to a group of us who have been friends since we were eighteen years old. It is one of the most lovely poems I have read in a long time. Enjoy.

BENEATH THE SWEATER AND THE SKIN

by Jeannette Encinias

How many years of beauty do I have left?

she asks me.

How many more do you want?

Here. Here is 34. Here is 50.

When you are 80 years old

and your beauty rises in ways

your cells cannot even imagine now

and your wild bones grow luminous and

ripe, having carried the weight

of a passionate life.

When your hair is aflame

with winter

and you have decades of

learning and leaving and loving

sewn into

the corners of your eyes

and your children come home

to find their own history

in your face.

When you know what it feels like to fail

ferociously

and have gained the

capacity

to rise and rise and rise again.

When you can make your tea

on a quiet and ridiculously lonely afternoon

and still have a song in your heart

Queen owl wings beating

beneath the cotton of your sweater.

Because your beauty began there

beneath the sweater and the skin,

remember?

This is when I will take you

into my arms and coo

YOU BRAVE AND GLORIOUS THING

you’ve come so far.

I see you.

Your beauty is breathtaking.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

2899. Have you ever wished upon a star?

Bad Ideas

Do you remember these shoes? They were called “jellies.” They were the best blister creators you could ever imagine wearing. Sometimes even the worst of ideas start taking on a life of their own. In fact, often times the worst ideas explode like they were the best things since sliced bread. I’ll leave it to you to create your own list of popular people/places/things that are absolutely ridiculous.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

903. Name something you had a close call with.

Friday’s Tea

*****Happy Birthday, Big Red!! You were the one who made us want to keep on going!! You are one of the most self-actualized people I have ever known. I love you.*****

My friend recently came back from a business trip in the midwest and she said that she had tried the most fabulous tea she ever had tasted while she was out there. Naturally, I had to order some for myself. Today’s favorite is Fraser Tea, their Hot Spicy Cinnamon tea, in particular. It is delightfully flavorful tea that tastes slightly sweet despite having no added sugar or sweetener. When my order arrived, someone from the Fraser family wrote a lovely handwritten thank you note welcoming me to the Fraser Tea family. It was a delightful surprise!! You can order some Fraser Tea here, at their well-done website: https://frasertea.com/

It is also our spicy little brown dog’s birthday today (Trip is a Boykin spaniel). Trip turns four today and our eldest son said that means, that today, they are both turning 28! Have a fun and fabulous Friday, friends. See you tomorrow!!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

861. Are you a lover or a fighter?

The Part that Isn’t Shown

****Happy Birthday to the love of my life!!! There is no one else I would rather share these amazing memories with, and future incredible adventures with, than you!! You are my greatest gift in my life. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. xoxo*****

Based on the stats, and a few texts that I got from some readers of the blog in my personal life, yesterday’s blog hit a nerve. Wakeup People on X posted this meme below today, that sort of continues on yesterday’s theme. Most of the good which we witness in people’s lives has been hard won, treasured, valued, prioritized, worked for . . . . yes, some people do get “lucky breaks”, but even the “lucky breaks” must be cherished, preserved and appreciated in order for them to continue to be a blessing in someone’s life. It is important to know, and to respect and honor, how hard most people have worked to get, and to keep, their good jobs, their robust savings, their lovely homes, their happy families, their healthy marriages, their vast knowledge, their honed talents, their vital bodies, their strong faiths, their loving relationships, their peace of mind. Most people who have, and who hold on to these things which we say that we universally want, do not take these greatest of things in life, for granted. They work at all of this with the underlying fuel of gratefulness that they have the ability to create, and to experience, and to continue to nourish, all of the best that life has to offer them.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

1942. Do you know how to ride a bike?

It Gets Weird

Sometimes you see something that describes yourself and you think, “Wow, spot on. I never saw it so succinctly written, but this is it. This is me.”

I almost feel exposed, but also relieved and validated at the same time. I am a happy, perky, friendly, upbeat person. I get excited about a lot of little things (and big things, too.) I laugh a lot and heartily. I think sometimes I have been mistaken for clueless, naive, “toxically” positive, sheltered, just “lucky”. Sometimes I almost feel like I need to be apologetic about my happy nature and yet, I have certainly had my fair share of heartaches, much like anyone else who has reached their fifties.

My nature is to experience everything fully and deeply. So when I am experiencing “happy” it’s BIG. It’s BRIGHT and SHINY. It stands out. But I take everything to heart. I mull over everything, the good and the bad – again and again. I tend to carry it all with me and sometimes this adds a lot of weight to my soul.

Does this resonate with any of you? Do you feel misunderstood a lot of the time? I hope this added a little understanding to at least one of you, today, like it did for me. It’s an interesting fact that the sun weighs 330,000 times the weight of the earth. So clearly, even carrying around sunshine can be a heavy load.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

2435. What song do you know ALL the words to? (Ummm, “Happy Birthday.”)

Sprinkles

This is all that I have today, friends. It’s been a morning of disruptions and changed plans, but that doesn’t matter. All that matters is the sundae. Wishing you a wonderful sundae with a lot of pretty and yummy sprinkles on top!!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

1361. In your opinion, what’s “the best thing since sliced bread?”

Monday – Funday

credit, @woofknight, X

Only one April’s Fools day did I play a joke on the blog, and then I felt bad for at least five days after that (and maybe even more because I am still writing about it). So this year, no jokes. Happy April! Happy full swing of spring! Happy start to the 2nd quarter of the year!!

“About all you can do in life is be who you are. Some people will love you for you. Most will love you for what you can do for them, and some won’t like you at all.” – Rita Mae Brown

I’ve been mulling around the concept of radical acceptance for a while now. Before you can make any meaningful changes in your life, you must come to a radical acceptance as to how things exactly are, right in this moment. You accept the reality of where you are, in this moment, and everything that comes with this moment – the emotions, the implications, the situations and the people whom you cannot change, and you come to a peace with these elements. You can also come to a radical acceptance of your past – events that have happened, good relationships and bad relationships throughout the years, the fairness and unfairness of life, etc. In short, with radical acceptance, you don’t mull over the unfairness of what could have happened, or the unfairness of what is. When you just utilize “regular acceptance”, this implies resignation and almost agreeing with “giving up” and this is why we often resist acceptance. Regular acceptance feels hopeless and dejected. Radical acceptance faces truth head on, with the idea of looking at your options going forward, with a practical lens. Radical acceptance allows you to clearly feel and to process your feelings about a situation, but then to move forward and to make decisions for your best interests, based on reality. Radical acceptance gives you power.

Unfortunately, we have a tendency to avoid radical acceptance of people and of situations because we don’t want to face things as they are . . . .we wish that things were different. We hang on to hopes that we can change a person, or change a situation, or change what has happened in the past, but these things are impossible. When we avoid radical acceptance, we live in a constant limbo and we dance with the same cycles of disappointment, again and again. When we avoid radical acceptance, we play a part in our own suffering. As hurtful as it can be, to face the pain of “what is” head on, is what will ultimately gives us relief and direction. Radical acceptance stops the ongoing suffering. It allows us to make boundaries and to change our mindset, instead of staying stuck in the mire of frustration and despair.

I’ve put the circle of control on this blog several times, but it bears repeating. When we allow ourselves to experience radical acceptance, we fully understand and accept what is in our control and what is not in our control.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

1011. Name the biggest risk you have ever taken.

Stick with the Good Friday

Happy Good Friday! Fridays are all good, but Good Friday is the “goodest” of all. The above picture is a sticker that you can purchase from Zazzle. I LOVE that stickers are making a big comeback. My sister and I shared a carefully curated sticker collection when we were little girls. Now my twenty-something kids purchase stickers all of the time. Recently, my eldest son’s girlfriend purchased one of the neatest stickers that I have ever seen from one of our local touristy towns. It had the depiction of an old-fashioned postcard but it also had a QR code on it that opened up to a slide show of all of the highlights of the town. So today, my favorite for this Friday, is stickers. Aren’t they grand? I might have to start up a collection of my own, to rival my childhood album of stickers.

*****Every single year since I started writing this daily blog, I have taken Easter weekend off from writing. I try to practice what I preach. I truly believe that Easter weekend is the ultimate RESET button and pressing this button, is exactly what I need to do. On Easter, I take time from my “typical” daily, routine life, to just be. I use Easter weekend to rest, rejuvenate, reflect and restore. Easter is the ultimate reminder of true, unconditional love. Allow this pure love to flow freely to you, all weekend long. Come back to your everyday life on Monday – reset, rested, restored and revitalized. See you then!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

932. Is there any experience that you regret not having had yet?

Your Most Precious Art

I purchased these little cardboard signs from a boutique the other day. I didn’t have a lot of time to spare and there were hundreds of them, but I pulled out a few and bought them, and these two that I purchased, shown above, spoke to me the most.

You are your own most magnificent piece of art. You, and how you go about your life, is a one-of-a-kind, priceless form of art in motion. Are you deliberate about your “art”? Are you creative about your “art”? Is your art truly yours and authentic, or is it a copy of someone else’s art? Are you too concerned about being seen and appreciated and understood? If a fabulous piece of artwork is being carefully stored in a warehouse, or sits quietly in an obscure museum or in someone’s personal residence, it is still a fabulous piece of art. Where the artwork is, or if it is being viewed or not, has no bearing on its gorgeous, unique qualities. Is your “art” one dimensional or is it fluid and evolving and multi-faceted? How are you treating the artwork of your life? Think of your most favorite possession. Would you let someone walk on this possession with their dirty feet? I read something the other day, that says that our bodies know to reject poisonous food. Our senses tell us when something is spoiled. We must trust that our bodies also send us clues when something, or someone, is poisonous for our minds. We must learn to trust our built-in messenger system, in order to keep our “art” in pristine, protected quality. Our intuition is the best plexiglass/alarm system for our own artwork, we could ever ask for, if we learn to trust its messages.

“Every human is an artist. The dream of your life is to make beautiful art.” – Don Miguel Ruiz

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

458. How shy are you when you meet new people?

Rose of Jericho

These are just a small collection of orchids that we keep on top of our “tranquility pond.” I bought many of them on impulse, during grocery store specials. After their blooms would fall off, I used to start to worry, and do everything that I could to make them bloom again. I often ended up over-watering them, over-spraying them with Orchid food, often to their detriment. My wise husband talked me into bringing them outside, hanging some under some trees and placing many of them here on top of the pond. Now I leave them alone for the most part, just occasionally watering them, and they are so happy. They bloom regularly. They trust in their own natural growth cycles, and now, in my wisdom which I gleaned from experience, so do I.

Above is “The Rose of Jericho” plant. It appears to be just a dead ball of twigs or leaves, but when placed in water it turns green again. It can continue this cycle again and again, drying and withering into a tight little ball, only to open wide up to the fertility and freshness of life, when it is ready to do so, and the conditions are right.

This time of year is the perfect time of year to meditate on your own resurrection experiences, in your own life. This time of year is the perfect time of year to see how many “springs”, both real and metaphorical, have occurred in your lifetime, as you have evolved into the being who you are today. The plants know when it is time to be dormant, and when it is time to bloom. They trust that the conditions will be right for their inevitable growth cycles. If plants and animals live in ease with the cycles of nature, why don’t we?

I read a good story the other day that said we can push “the reset” button whenever we want to, on our own lives, on our own days, on our own minutes. This is a time of year when the “Reset” button is just begging to be pushed. It is big and green and it is raring to go, with big plans for us to grow and to bloom and to come alive again in new splendor. Press the “Reset” button. Press it again, and even again, if you have to, but then trust the cycles. Bask in the nurturance and abundance all around you, and just bloom. Open up to life and bloom.

“If you want your story to be magnificent, begin by realizing you are the author, and every day is a new page.” – Mark Houlahan

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

1160. What “new beginning” are you most looking forward to?