Anticipating workers being here all day to work on our pool cage while attempting to calm and corral our three boisterous dogs, means that I will need some big laughs today. Luckily, I found them. I can’t stop watching and laughing at the video below. “Sag-Who-Tarrius! That’s MY sign! YESSS! Look at me! I’m Fire! Sagittarius #1!”
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
NBC News has a great comprehensive list for Cyber Monday deals and they have broken it out into different categories, such as clothing, home goods, tech, etc. Here is the link below:
https://www.nbcnews.com/select/shopping/best-cyber-monday-deals-sales-2023-rcna126239
I felt a little stressed over the weekend, with friends texting pictures of their beautiful Christmas decorations and sharing ideas of how to make your house smell like a pine scented forest, for the holidays. My husband and I weren’t up for decorating for Christmas yet, thus my dozens of glass pumpkins are still scattered around the house and wafts of my Pumpkin Spice wallflowers still permeate the air in our home. I read something on the internet that supposedly, in Ireland, it is technically illegal to do any kind of Christmas decorating, shopping or celebrating, until December 8th. I’m not sure if this is true, but this year my Celtic roots must be coming strongly to the surface. Either that, or my inner Grinch needs to be squelched and the pumpkins need to be squashed in order to make room for some fragrant wreaths and cheery mistletoe.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
+ The picture above is not a great picture because I’m not a great photographer. But you get the gist. That’s our neighbors’ Christmas tree. (That’s a really big truck below it, to give you perspective of its magnanimous size) That’s our neighbors’ mini Rockefeller Center Christmas tree. It’s really beautiful and they always manage to get it all decorated right before Thanksgiving. All of the rest of the decorations on our street have really just become accents to it. I mean should the rest of us even bother now??? Seriously though, the neighborhood’s “absolute opposite of Charlie Brown’s Christmas tree” is huge and beautiful, and I love it. And yes I’m jealous, but the tree is fabulous and I love it.
+ Siri’s nice now!! For those of you who use iPhones, and if you did the latest update, you’ll notice that Siri now says, “You’re welcome!” in her best Chick-Fil-A employee voice when you thank her for the information that she gave to you. (Yes, I have always thanked Siri. Manners, babe.) She also doesn’t seem quite as bothered and smirky when you ask her for information. AI is evolving and in a good way, this go around, in my opinion.
+ Today is the 60th anniversary of President John F. Kennedy’s assassination in Dallas. Over a decade ago, I took all four of our children on a road trip through several states and even more cities (yes, it was crazy – one child was still in diapers, but that is what you do when you are young, energetic and idealistic. Also, there was no GPS at the time. My kids always laugh about my books of Mapquest printed sheets, which I used back then, to get us all around). We stopped at Dealey Plaza, where Kennedy was shot, and we were approached by a “tour guide” who turned out to be a homeless man with a lot of conspiracy theories. He was a colorful character who started all of his sentences with a dramatic, thickly Southern accented “Looky here! Looky here!” When I think back to that trip, I don’t remember a lot of it, but I do remember “Looky here!” In fact it has become part of our family’s vernacular. We gave the “tour guide” a handsome tip and I’m grateful for that because he gave us a memory which has lasted nearly two decades and still brings a smile to my face.
+ Before the holidays are upon us, remember that you are making memories, and these memories can be happy, funny, silly, “Looky here!” memories or they can become horrible, searing, imprinted memories that everyone tries to forget, but can’t. The holidays tend to bring out the best and the worst in all of us. If you are seeing someone who doesn’t visit often, but is coming to be with you now this Thanksgiving, relish that fact. Don’t use that time to make them feel guilty for not visiting more. Do you think that guilty feelings will make them want to come back for more helpings of ghastly guilt, down the line? Loving, enjoyable, easygoing energy is much more likely to pull them back for a few more visits, because everyone likes to feel good and loved and appreciated for what they do, and accepted for who they really are, in this world. Looky here, steer the conversations towards beautiful decorations everyone has seen, and funny “piles of Mapquest pages” stories that everyone can laugh about, and happily reminisce with each other. Stuff the turkey. Don’t stuff your opinions about volatile topics down everyone’s throats. There is a time and a place for those conversations, and a happy holiday gathering isn’t that time nor that place. If there was ever a time to concentrate on my blog’s tagline, it is during a holiday celebration. Print it out and put in your pocket. Imprint it on your mind. You won’t regret it. A surefire way to have a wonderful holiday season is to focus on all of the good. Be the star on your family’s celebrations this season. And by being the star, I don’t mean constantly stealing the spotlight for laughs and attention on you. When I say “Be the Star”, I mean be that beacon of light and love and kindness that puts the spotlight on others’ acts of love and light and kindness. Be that star which guides everyone towards hope and love and light. Here is my tagline:
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
“Children see magic because they look for it.” – Christopher Moore
Merry Christmas! May it be a magical day for all of us. Sundays are devoted to poetry on the blog. Poetry is like a magical language. Like no other form of communication, poetry takes the alchemization of what you, the reader, brings to it, for the meaning of the poem to come to life. Better yet, each poem is unique to each and every reader, because poetry, in it’s freest, truest form, is really and truly up to individual interpretation. I read this poem last night by the poet Joseph Fasano, and I love it. Whatever your age, never lose the belief in the magical qualities of life.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
As a woman who grew up in Pittsburgh, PA (RIP – Franco Harris – a true Pittsburgh great, in every sense of the word), and then spent most of her adult life in the south, I can attest that the above meme is true and worth a smile. I spent many clueless moments on icy roads, all by myself, when we first moved to Charlotte, NC from Pittsburgh. It turns out that the south does not have salt storage domes. I hope that wherever you are, you remain safe and warm this weekend.
Happy Friday!!! Is everyone ready for the holiday weekend? Is everyone sick of patiently answering, and politely asking that question? Now, it’s finally here. (It’s funny, the Big Day isn’t really even quite here yet and my daughter just announced that her social battery is on way low. Mine is on dead and draining out orange gook.)
Back to the program: My regular readers know that I devote Fridays on the blog to the frivolous. On Fridays, I list a favorite of mine and who knows, it may end up being a favorite of yours, too?
Today’s favorite: Landies Candies stuffed chocolate pretzels. My friend gave me some of these delectable treats for Christmas and with every bite, I fell more in love. These are chocolate covered pretzels which are also filled with luscious caramel and peanut butter filling. I am not sure if I have ever had a tastier treat. This is a good one to keep in your back pocket to give out as a treat, next Christmas. Landies Candies website is here:
https://landies.com/
I am sending lots of warmth and love from my heart to yours. May the hearth of my heart help to keep you warm and comforted no matter how far apart we may be. Happy Christmas Weekend!
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
I always tend to get a little frustrated at this time of year. This time of year is also around my birthday, and so my juices really get flowing, thinking about what I want in the new year. I get excited about the little tweaks that I want to make in myself and in my habits, and I get electrified about the adventures that I want to plan, and to go on. I get revved up like a racehorse, chomping at the bit, in a starting gate. I want to “Go!” And sometimes the holidays feel like an annoying distraction. Sometimes the holidays feel like this inching along, tedious, busy work detour to go through, before I get to the place where the starting gate is able to be open once again. And as I write this, I realize that this is a terrible attitude.
You have to get to the finish line before you start the next race. And you have to take a slower paced victory lap, in order to build your stamina, and to catch your breath before you are ready to start a new race. You have to process what you did right in your last run, and where there is room for improvement. You must take the time to rest, and to celebrate your growth and the experience which you gained, and to integrate these aspects of wisdom into yourself, before you start galloping off again. A deliberate slowdown is important, and this celebratory, introspective time is not meant to be rushed through. The holidays are the time to cool off, to stand still, and revel in the adornment of the “Garland of Roses”, celebrating another year lived in your own precious life. To run races, one right after another, again and again, is just not sustainable. So, in short, whoa Nelly! (Or in my case, whoa Kelly!) The new race is right around the corner. Take a breath. Rest, reflection, and revelry is every bit as important as racing onward.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
Our eldest son came home for the holidays yesterday. If our son didn’t realize how excited his mom and dad were for him to be here, our dogs made sure to show him. To be as uninhibited as a happy dog, should be on all of our holiday wish lists this year.
Speaking of dogs, I had sort of a mystical experience this weekend, when I opened up a box of a Christmas wreath which we never put up, but we keep in our attic year after year. In the box, was only the wreath and a small, white satin pouch. I opened the pouch and I found an ornament with a picture of Lacey, my first collie and the dog who transformed me and loved me like no other dog in my life. I do not recall ever buying, or seeing this ornament. It touched my heart deeply and I felt connected to the spirit of Lacey and all the love she gave to me and our family. This ornament will be the centerpiece of this year’s tree.
I wrote about Lacey, years ago, here:
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
How’s everyone doing this holiday season? As I say to my family, “I’m taking your temperature. How does it read?” I’m doing alright. I find that I am only able to handle my extra holiday stuff/chores in spurts. When I feel the mojo, I order some presents, or I make sure to tip the mail carrier. My husband and I still haven’t gotten our Christmas decoration mojo going yet, which is admittedly a little embarrassing, particularly at night, in our brightly lit, merry, “in the spirit” neighborhood, but honestly, not quite embarrassing enough to do anything about it.
I think what is difficult about the holidays is that regular life doesn’t stop. Our kids are headed into their finals, at their challenging universities. We have to help make decisions regarding a family member’s health. We still get the sniffles and various aches and pains. We still have to keep up our “appointments” – doctor, dentist, work, vet, haircuts, etc. Our own family also has birthdays and a graduation to celebrate. When I look at the illustration above, I can remind myself that I can decide how many extra decorations and bright lights (in the form of commitments) that I want to add to my schedule this year. The world won’t stop if my Christmas cards become New Years cards, or don’t even come into being at all. My neighbors will know that I am still their caring neighbor, even if I just put a wreath on the door this year. If we finally break down and buy an artificial tree, it will still house and protect our beautiful, meaningful ornaments and there are plenty of pine scented candles available to purchase and light.
Perhaps the best gift which we can give to ourselves this holiday season is a break. I will help you. Here is your gift, your gift of “a break”. We are giving ourselves this gift of a break early, when we can actually use it and it won’t get lost in all of the wrapping and kerfuffle:
And here is what is inside. This is for you to use whenever you need to, holidays and beyond. It’s your gift of “It’s okay.” Use it copiously. It has the magical powers of reenergizing you, and regenerating itself for whenever you need it.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
Merry Christmas!! I am sneaking on here to wish my beloved readers all of the best that the day has to offer. That’s the beauty of having older children. The festivities start well after sunrise, when the kids grow up. Although those of you with young grandchildren may be having a different experience right now. You’re sleepy and smiley and lucky and giddy right now, aren’t you?!!
Whatever feelings arise today, just feel ’em and then free ’em. Today can be a complicated day. There are no “shoulds”. Just try to savor the gift of a lifetime that you’re always unwrapping, every single day – the gift of experiencing a lifetime on Earth. It’s an interesting ride, isn’t it?
I appreciate you all. Your audience is what makes this a blog and not just another one of my personal journals, lying around, cluttering things up. You’re a vital part of Adulting – Second Half. I love you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
Yesterday I experienced some of the lesser qualities that often come up during the holidays. These annoying little frustrations: cancelled orders, delayed orders, thinly-veiled passive aggressive guilt trips, twinkly lights half on/half off, things breaking out of nowhere when I am in a rush to go, long waits to get chores completed, and an email from the high school principal telling us parents to please not worry about a viral, national social media post, threatening bombs and guns at numerous, anonymous American high schools, across the nation. When these types of happenings occur as a one-off, you usually let them slide off your back as best you can, but in the middle of the holidays, when there is this underlying expectation to be so jolly and merry and bright, this string of annoyances made me start to behave like I belong on The Naughty List, in a big way.
While there are so many things that I love about the holidays, yesterday made me focus on what I like the least about the holidays, and that is the distraction of it all. It’s not like our everyday chores and obligations and routines go away, while we are busily and yet also thoughtfully, trying to do all of “the extras” that come with the show. Sometimes I even feel resentful. I just want my “normal” life back. During the holidays, it’s often easy to become irritable, and then flog yourself for being an irritable brat, during what is supposed to be “the most wonderful time of the year.”
That being said, yesterday I also noticed some of those most special gifts that tend to come around the holidays, the gifts that aren’t wrapped in a bow, and put under the tree. My two youngest children, celebrated being done with their finals, by going to see the Spiderman movie together last night. They both have been Marvel fans since they were little, and they made giddy plans, careful to not watch any spoilers, to go see a movie that they both ended up thinking was one of the best Spiderman movies they had ever seen. When they came home and excitedly regaled my husband and I, with the highlights of the show, my mind kept flashing back to two little children, brother and sister duo, watching Marvel cartoons and playing with action figures for hours. I think, at this moment, I might have started glowing like the Christmas tree.
One of our youngest son’s best friends from high school (and who also attends the same university), picked up our son for some golf yesterday, and he also told our son to keep himself free Monday night, because a few of my son’s buddies are wanting to take him out to a fancy steak house, to belatedly celebrate our son’s 21st birthday. This invitation came on the heels of the news that my son’s fraternity brothers did a fundraiser late this fall, and were proudly able to send a check for over $1000 to the Epilepsy Foundation, in my son’s honor. My son has had to remain home with us, for the majority of this semester, because his epileptic seizures have been uncontrolled, and as always, his wonderful friends have been so supportive and loving and kind. And witnessing all of this, reminded me of just how loving and supportive and kind all of our friends and our family have been to us, during this difficult chapter in my son’s epilepsy experience. And this is when I know that I started glowing, even brighter than our Christmas tree. And I didn’t feel distracted at all, at that moment. At that moment, watching my happy, contented children and reflecting on the love that we have been given from so many people, and the love that we have for so many people, despite my earlier frustrations, in this sometimes crazy, annoying, distracting, frenetic time of the year, all that I felt at that very moment, was peace. All that I felt was love. All that I felt was gratefulness. And these priceless, eternal presents, are the presents that are always here for the taking, when I take the time to notice them, and to soak them in. And that’s when I get that glow, that glow that starts from deep within my heart. I get that glow which you could never buy in a bottle. And I try to hold on to that glow, for as long as I can.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
