I don’t know if I am alone in this sentiment, but my Januaries tend to be “fits and starts.” My intentions are always full speed, but then I get sidetracked and waylaid and confused and distracted by my bloodhound of a nose whom I call “Curiosity”, with a mix of affection and annoyance. As much as I feel like I should be taking the direct road ahead, full speed, non-stop into 2025, my self-driving car is quick to take the side roads, seemingly longing for the more interesting, intriguing scenic route.
For me, today feels like another one of those “true starts to the new year.” Today is a new moon and the official start of the Asian Lunar New Year. It is said to be an extremely auspicious day for casting out into the Universe, our deepest intentions for the new year ahead. This is supposed to be a highly transformational, spiritual year, by many beliefs and faiths. It’s a year to embrace mystery and wisdom in equal parts.
The other night when my husband and I were watching a football game that was going really, really south, really, really fast for one of the teams, the announcer, Tony Romo said that it is key in any football game/season, for any football team, to “learn from the past, but don’t live in it.” This is an excellent day to take this advice for ourselves. Take wisdom from our lessons of 2024 and from all of the years prior, but at the same time, look forward to, and embrace, the mystery that 2025 and the years beyond it, have to offer us.
On a different note, I recently read that “forests are the lungs of the Earth.” Isn’t that beautiful? When you are in a moment when you need to center yourself, and just get back to your breath, imagine deeply breathing in a beautiful, serene, ancient forest, and just breathe, along with the steady, wise lungs of the beautiful Earth.
Friends, Happy New Year, once again!!
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
It’s Friday, the best day of the week!!! For old times’ sake, I promise to add a favorite thing of mine, for you to ponder purchasing, at the end of my post, but first, also for old times’ sake, I have a really cool No Horsepucky story that happened just last week:
My regular readers already know that we lost our big yellow Labrador retriever, Ralphie, during the holidays. He had an aggressive lymphoma, and was in a lot of pain, and so we had him euthanized in our home. This was understandably devastating for all of us in our family.
Now there is a field, by a church with some homes across the street, that we would take all three of our dogs to, on occasion. We would take them off of their leads and let them run their energy off, while they gleefully ran circles around us. We were always careful to make sure there that were no other dogs nor children around. Admittedly, there is a leash law in this town that holds this big, wide open field. And also admittedly, we were breaking the law when we did this. Last week, around dusk, we took our two remaining dogs, Josie, a tricolor rough collie, and Trip, a Boykin spaniel, (also known as “little brown dogs”) to this field and we let them off of their leads, in order to run around like mad and chase each other. Lo and behold, within minutes, out of nowhere, there appeared flashing red and blue lights. A young police officer came out of a police car, and so we immediately put the dogs back on their leashes.
The officer looked chagrined. “Guys, I’m sorry,” he said. “There is a regular, same, anonymous caller who probably retired too soon, who thinks that their new job is to enforce every ordinance in this town.” He sighed. “So, I am sure that they are watching me talk to you. I have to tell you that you can’t let your dogs off of their leashes.”
“Understood, officer,” I said respectfully. “We’ll keep our direwolves under control,” my husband muttered under his breath.
“It’s really weird, though,” the officer said, as he turned to get back into his patrol car. “The caller said that it was a big yellow lab running off lead.”
True story. No horsepucky.
Okay, and now here’s the promised favorite for this freezing Friday (even here in Florida – yikes!). I read an article in the WSJ before Christmas that this particular ice cream scoop is better than all others. Supposedly, the way that the scoop conducts heat from your hands, makes scooping ice cream particularly easy, smooth and simple. So, I stuffed my family’s stockings with them, and when my daughter opened hers she exclaimed that they were the exact same scoops that she had used when working at our local, beachy, well-known, famous-in-these-parts ice cream shop.
What is this marvelous, must have contraption? It’s the Zeroll, Size 20, Original IceCream Scoop, and you can order it from Amazon. Now, go buy your favorite ice cream so you can try it for yourself. Yum. (Some good things do come from freezing cold.)
Finally, here’s a great question that my husband (who played football his entire youth) posed to me recently when I was getting my panties in a knot over nothing really. He said to me, “Babe, what’s the long-game here?” It jolted me into perspective quickly. Most of our little aggravations with people and with situations, aren’t that big of a deal in the scheme of things. But relationships and events can be damaged and possibly even ruined if we let these little grievances get to us, and we react poorly. So when you find yourself in a frustrated state, take a pause and ask yourself, “What’s the long-game here?” I think that this question will come quite in handy, as our family has two weddings in the horizon. While we want these days to be incredibly special, we all know that things rarely go exactly as planned. The long-game in any wedding, is a special, warm celebration of two people’s love and commitment to one another. The long-game is supporting a happy, healthy union.
The next time that you are spiraling, take a beat, and ask yourself, “What is the long-game here?” And then decide whether your actions and choices are supporting the long-game in any endeavor or relationship that is important to you. And after careful consideration, if you are quite okay with the long-game being shortened or ended, by all means, have at it.
Have a great weekend, friends! Scoop some ice cream and play the long game.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
“Life is a song – sing it. Life is a game – play it. Life is a challenge – meet it. Life is a dream – realize it. Life is a sacrifice – offer it. Life is love – enjoy it.” – Sai Baba
Dear Friends,
I don’t know about you, but I usually love the start of the new year because it makes me feel inspired and energized and “raring to go.” But honestly, at this time, this year, I feel a little differently. I feel a little depleted. I feel a little confused, and a little out of sorts. I feel a little overwhelmed and undirected and not as confident as usual.
Our country has been through a lot of intensity, in the last six months or so, particularly. We have dealt (and are still dealing) with out-of-proportion natural events, out-of-proportion political events, and also, as we know that every personal life is a world unto its own, so many of us have dealt with out-of-proportion personal events going on at the same time as the major events around us swirl (storms within storms). Intensity is not necessarily “bad.” But even feeling intensely good is a stressor to our minds, and our bodies, and our souls. Intensity, by its very definition, is a lot.
We all know that we have very little to no control of people and of events outside of ourselves, but the beauty of it is, we DO have control of how we react and how we respond to everything. And no one else has control over these reactions and these responses, but us.
I have often thought that our responses to situations come out of two places – fear or love. This is confusing sometimes, because how can you love something that you deem as truly awful? How can you approach something terrible with love? Faith comes from love. Hope comes from love. Curiosity and openness comes from love. Community and service and generosity comes from love. Optimism comes from love. Fear breeds faithlessness, hopelessness, closed mindedness, isolation, suspicion and greed and pessimism. Loving someone or something doesn’t mean that you always agree with it, or like it, or enjoy it. Loving someone or something doesn’t mean that you don’t want the circumstances to change. Loving just means fully accepting something as it currently is, and choosing a faithful, hopeful, curious, open-minded, service-minded, generous, optimistic approach to the situation, and to yourself and to others, all at the same time.
We recently spent a lovely night with close friends of ours whose home was greatly damaged in the Florida hurricanes of last fall. Despite the sadness, and frustrations, and the awfulness of the situation, our friends talked of getting closer to their friends and neighbors. They talked of the joy and excitement of seeing a waterway opened that had long been closed to boats and activities. They talked of fun changes which they can make to their home, that they had long talked about doing. They spoke with faith, hope, curiosity, openness, and abundance. They spoke of love for each other, for their home, for their community and for their state. Would have they preferred to not go through the travesty of the hurricanes? Of course! But they are choosing to respond to the situation out of love, and not out of fear.
It is my belief, that our souls decided to experience this lifetime. It is my belief that our souls decided that we were up for the adventure, and also for the triumphs and even the travesties that could come from this daunting adventure. Our souls signed on to carry out Sai Baba’s quotation: “Life is a song – sing it. Life is a game – play it. Life is a challenge – meet it. Life is a dream – realize it. Life is a sacrifice – offer it. Life is love – enjoy it.” Our souls decided to take this roller coaster ride of our lifetimes, knowing that at the end of the ride, despite all of its thrills, and all of its ups and downs, we would end up safely at our port of entry. Our love of tactile, sensual, creative experiences overcame our fears of the unknown, as we stepped into the seats to take the rides of our lives.
Much love to you all, my dear soulmates,
Kelly
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
+ I was listening to a podcast yesterday that suggested that instead of solving our problems, we have a tendency to “change” our problems. So, we allow ourselves to get distracted with other people’s problems, or with other smaller problems in our own lives, without tackling the biggest problems, which are wreaking havoc in our own lives. It’s a neat little trick that we play on ourselves. It’s the very definition of codependency to focus on taking care of, or “fixing” others, instead of what is ours to take care of and fix – ourselves. What are you avoiding in your own life, with the premise that you are too busy dealing with other problems (and often, other people’s problems)? What are you trying to distract yourself from, instead of facing the problem head on and looking for ways to solve it?
+ My husband was talking to an independently wealthy man at work who said that he thinks that he is a better employee because he chooses to work. He does not have to work, for money. My husband said that he sees that the opposite is true, too. If you have to work to provide for your family, and there is no other way, you will hustle like nobody’s business. So, what I take from this conversation, is that employees from both extremes will make your best employees. Self-motivated workers who are doing the job for the intrinsic qualities that it gives to their lives, and self-motivated workers who are desperate to provide a nice life for themselves and their families. The shared quality is “self-motivated.” And what I have heard from every business owner I have ever met, is that finding good, reliable, steady employees is the hardest part of the business. If I were a business owner, I would suss out what is deeply motivating (or not) to a potential employee.
+ And a quote that struck me from my readings this week: “Sometimes you have to end things before they end you.”
+ Okay, I have heard from many of you that you miss my Favorite Things Friday posts, so I will give you one of my favorites for today. I bought a small Tibetan singing bowl set for around $10 on Amazon and I strike it three times every morning. It soothes me. I love to hear the sound of it. I consider this to be my own personal reset button, to start my day. And even “the less woo-woo than me, i.e. my entire family” have stated that they like the sound of it, too. Enjoy your senses. This is the real meaning of being sensual.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
I know that I have a few loyal California readers, and I want to let you know that my heart and prayers are with you, and all whom you love. These last six months or so, in the United States particularly, it has been beyond proven that we are no match for the elements. May you all be safe and serene and find glimmers of hope in this horrible situation. If you get a chance, please let us know that you are okay.
Yesterday, marked the first real day of the new year for me. It was the first time I had my house completely to myself in over a month. (and as an introvert who craves solitude, this was deeply delicious) I went straight into a nesting instinct on steroids, and I cleaned every linen on every single bed in the house. I had saved our bed for the last, and so, way past our bedtime, our mattress pad was still drying in the drier. Therefore, I made up a makeshift pile of blankets on our bed and I told my husband that we were “camping.” We officially started the new year, “camping” in our own bed.
I no longer write a regular Favorite Things Friday blog post, but I do want to recommend a couple of fun little gadgets. The first one is one that I bought for myself, for my birthday:
Solareye Bird Feeder with Camera – This bird feeder is a joy. I am spying on all of my hungry little feathered friends with a close-up view. I’ve only had it up for a few weeks, and I have already “collected” 12 different species of birds, all captured on video, for me to view whenever I need a smile. This feeder turns “birds-eye view” on its heels! The Carolina Chickadee has proven to be my most frequent visitor so far. This hungry little guy has shown up 32 times already.
Also, my eldest son and his fiancee’ got us an Aura Digital Frame for Christmas and it is amazing! It was super easy to set up (with their help, of course. They’re young!) The best part of this frame is that all of us in the family can download pictures to a shared Aura App any time that we desire, and then the pictures (and videos) pop up on our frame. It’s such a lovely surprise to see a new picture of loved ones that we weren’t expecting, to suddenly pop up. I have owned other digital frames before, but the Aura takes things to a new level. I highly recommend it.
Spend those Amazon gift cards that you got for Christmas, on something good, that will continually bring a smile to your face. You can’t go wrong with either of these gadgets. Please share your gadget recommendations in my Comments, too.
Shifting gears, this was the daily peace quote:
“We must look at our life without sentimentality, exaggeration or idealism. Does what we are choosing reflect what we most deeply value?“
– Jack Kornfield
If you aren’t sure what you deeply value, look at what you do, and what you choose, in your everyday life. That is what you are showing yourself, and the world, what you truly value. If you are feeling unhappy or unsettled, chances are, you aren’t living your true values. Take some time for self-awareness at this beginning of this new year. If you value love, health, family, friends, security, using your talents, truth, integrity, joy, travel, service, nature, knowledge, hope, peace, loyalty, beauty, kindness, progress, adventure, faith etc. are your actions reflecting these values?
Okay, before I close, here’s another big hug to my readers from the beautiful state of California! May the best of today, be the worst of tomorrow for all of us in 2025. Onwards and upwards . . . . It’s all going to be okay.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
I don’t know much about numerology, but I have read a few articles about 2025 being a “9” year. All of this year’s digits added together equal the number nine. In numerology, a nine year, indicates “conclusion.” It indicates the end of a cycle, suggesting many endings and many new beginnings. The last “9” year we experienced was 2016. This gives me pause. For me, 2016 was a pivotal, tumultuous, eye-opening, exciting, yet upsetting year. It was a year that I had to make some really difficult decisions about my life going forward. I now, retrospectively, see just how much I grew, in just that one year. I see clearly now that 2016 indeed marked an ending point for me, and a beginning point of a new era of my life. If I am honest and I go all of the way back to 2007, I can see, too, how that particular year rounded out an era of my life, and showed indications of big changes ahead. Here is what some numerologists are saying that we should expect from a “9” year:
“This is the year to develop self-esteem and spiritual awakening. The goal is to become a version of yourself who is less bothered by nuisances and more moved by beauty and love.” (Credit: Today show)
“What can you expect during a 9 year? In addition to being a year of completion and tying up loose ends, the study of numerology suggests that “unhappy memories often arise so they can be healed” during this time.” (Credit: People.com)
“The 9 YEAR is the end of an era. ‘Going back’ to claim your future.
What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from. ~T.S. Eliot (Credit: Christine DeLorey)
“Personal Year 9 in numerology is a period of endings, healing, and preparation for new beginnings. It calls for reflection, release, and transformation as we bid farewell to the past nine years and step into a new cycle of growth and discovery.” (Credit: Astrology Realm)
It’s not lost on me that our middle son graduates from medical school this year, and our youngest, our daughter, will start her senior year of college this fall. Our four children’s formal schooling is coming to an end. Two of our children are engaged to be married. We are indeed concluding one era and entering into another era of the life of our family.
Does any of this ring true to you? What’s coming to a conclusion in your own life? What do you need let go of? What is about to start for you? Whether you buy into numerology, or not, these are all questions that can bring you some valuable insight about yourself and your life going forward.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
Happy New Year, friends. I hope that you had a lovely holiday season. Ours was beautiful, poignant, painful, joyful and full of change and expansion. It is clearly apparent now that our family is growing up and growing out, in all different interesting and fun directions, but our years and years of “same old/same old” when it comes to our holiday traditions have definitely come to pass. Our children all have wonderful long term significant others (our two eldest sons are engaged to be married) and so my husband and I have had to learn to share and to embrace change. We have had to learn to create new traditions, and to feel our way to these new traditions. We have also lost loved ones along the way, and this Christmas was no exception. Sadly, we found out that our Ralphie, our beautiful Labrador retriever, our last true “family dog” (our eldest two sons were still in college when we brought Ralphie home), had incurable and painful lymphoma and so we made the choice to have Ralphie euthanized at home with Lap of Love (this service came highly recommended to us by our friends. If you ever come to having to make this unfortunate choice, they were wonderful.) I suppose the only upside of this situation happening at Christmastime is that we all were with him, to say our goodbyes.
I know what I truly love when I do a search on my blog. I searched up “Ralphie” before I wrote this post and there were eight pages of blog posts to look through. Some of those excerpts are seen below. When I kissed Ralphie good-bye, I had this vision of him starting to cross the Rainbow Bridge, but then turning and jumping off of it, into beautiful crystal clear water and swimming to his beautiful, big heart’s content. Thank you for everything, my big, beautiful, lovable fur friend. Until we see you again . . . .
“Two years ago, when our elderly rescue spaniel/corgi mix passed, we decided we wanted a new puppy. We had moved to Florida and the kids really wanted a dog who would love the water. So, in researching, we decided we would get a Labrador Retriever, a big family dog which is known to be a water lover. My daughter and I picked out Ralphie, a Dudley yellow lab puppy and he truly is the most loving, funny, zany, adventurous, loyal dog that we have ever had the pleasure to live with. I now understand why they are such a popular breed. They are big dogs, so people are wary of them, yet they are the sweetest dogs alive. Ralphie hardly ever barks. Labrador Retrievers love everybody and all other dogs. They are curious, obedient, eager to please, and super smart. Ralphie turns our Roomba, the X-box and some light switches, on and off, and these are the tricks that he taught himself to do. Ralphie hates when anyone in the family is upset and he will do anything that he can to make you feel better. And water loving – oh my goodness, Ralphie is part dog/part fish. He swims in our pool more than any of us. He treads water, he puts his whole head in, and he leaps in the pool for his toys, endlessly. His joy for life is absolutely contagious! He brings a smile to my heart just thinking about him.”
“Ralphie is over-the-top, in your face exuberance and intensity. He is smart as a whip, lead hopelessly by his bear-sized nose, and constantly on the move, unless he is entirely passed out. Still he keeps his fervor going by swimming in his sleep. When he gives kisses, they are full, wet and all encompassing. His huge tongue is like a washcloth you would use to wash your car, and with a few passionate licks, he has managed to cover your whole face, your ears and your neck. He is not at all protective, he would definitely have the “flight” tendency in a “fight or flight” scenario. He is so absolutely and completely in-tuned to us, his family and to himself. Every night, he comes to the couch, where my husband and I are sitting, to remind us that it is his bedtime by lying his head on one of our knees.”
“Our Labrador retriever, Ralphie, spent a lot of time with us in the pool this weekend. He’s now an interesting shade of yellow-green. Ralphie is definitely “that blonde kid on the swim team.” You can’t miss the fact that he loves to swim.”
“Limp Tail Syndrome
They say it comes from swimming too much,
It came from doing your greatest love.
It stole your wag. It stole your grin.
Your body can’t smile in your wiggly way
with the big wet soppy toy in your mouth.
It will pass. All things do. But now
Your body just grimaces and growls,
And your tail hangs limp.
You wear your emotions on your whole body,
Not just a sleeve. You don’t hide anything.
You are the embodiment of life, breath and love,
And joy and pain and listless agitation.
You are so fully you, always and ever.
Soon your sprightly tail will wag again.
Easy, light, high and fast and free and happy.
Your tail never hangs limp for long.
It’s not in your nature to be kept down.”
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
