Tag: Mondays

Monday – Funday

credit: @woofknight, X

The Olympics closing ceremony was yesterday. Weren’t the Olympics great this year? The little ones start back to school today, in our neck of the woods. I heard the school busses making their rounds. We picked up our daughter at the airport last night, who flew in after her study abroad experience that she had this summer in Europe, and she already headed back to her university this morning, for sorority rush events. Our visiting adult kids left yesterday to go back to their own lives and schedules and I . . . . am exhaling.

Despite knowing that we have at least a couple more months of hot and sticky summer weather to endure, from a lifetime of living by the rhythm of school schedules, it definitely feels like I have yet another summer underneath my belt. I have experienced 53 summers in my lifetime. You enter into every summer with excitement and anticipation for plans of fun and leisure and relaxation and reunions and vacations and casual celebrations, and then it kind of takes you by surprise when seemingly all of the sudden, summer’s over. We had been planning my daughter’s summer in London for a long time. Everything went without a hitch. I am so grateful. I’m so relieved. And I am so happy to have her back in our country. And I honestly can’t believe that this long anticipated experience is now just a lovely memory in the past.

Someone once told me that aging is like a toilet roll. “The closer you get to the end,” he chuckled, “the faster it goes.” I thought that this was hilarious when I first heard it (when I was a bit younger). Now, I’m just aghast at the truth of it.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

2473. What new memories do you want to make?

Monday-Funday

Credit: @woofknight, X

I feel so highly distractible these days. I’m late with my blog post again, because someone asked me (specifically) to answer a question on Quora. I don’t know if I am going to answer the question. It’s a tough question and I don’t really write on Quora any longer. (I mostly answered questions there on that site, from 2016-2018) But what happened from this question, which I opened in my email this morning, is that I logged on to Quora, and for the first time in a long, long time, I started going down the rabbit hole of reading my answers to questions which I had written on Quora many years ago. And it was fascinating for me to see where my mindset was in my late forties, and what has stayed the same, and what has changed.

I have kept a daily journal since 2013. I have written on this blog almost daily since 2018. I wish I had started sooner. Friends, if you have never journaled before, do it now. It is so therapeutic and helpful in becoming more self-aware, and more compassionate to yourself when you realize how much you have experienced in your own one life. Some people use Facebook or Instagram as a daily journal and that works, too (although sometimes we don’t allow ourselves to be as honest and vulnerable on those venues as we would be in a private journal). Just do something that allows you to reflect on the “you”, who you authentically are, the “you” who you were, and the “you” who you are becoming. It’s important. You are important. Your life matters. You are your only project. Use tools that help you to reflect on and guide you, and also to compassionately (and passionately) love the greatest project of your life. You.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

2877. Do you think childhood or adulthood is harder, and in a few words, why?

Monday – Funday

Credit: YourTango

While the meme is funny, this past weekend was definitely full of drama, wasn’t it? Besides the assassination attempt (which sadly happened in my hometown, really close to where I grew up), we lost a few quite notable celebrities of my generation’s “coming up days” – Richard Simmons, Dr. Ruth and Shannen Doherty (it’s really surreal to be of the age, where more and more of the household names of the 70s-90s are passing at what feels like a more rapid pace. Gulp.), and the Euros finals, and the Wimbledon finals were played. (Didn’t Princess Kate look beautiful and radiant? It was lovely to see her out and about with her daughter.)

May this week be less of a slap, and more of a pause, for all of us. Let’s all be extra cautious, careful and considerate. There’s intense energy swirling all of us in this world. Let’s all find our calm in the center of our storms.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

1046. Finish this sentence as if it were your life: “It was a dark and stormy night . . .” (I had to pick this one because last night we had a window rattler of a storm. Even our collie, Josie, was hiding in the laundry room and she rarely shows fear.)

Monday – Funday

Credit: therandomvibez.com (Pinterest)

There is nothing like the jolt of the first Monday after a long vacation. It’s jarring and disorienting in its own special way. It’s like jumping into your place in a marching band in the middle of a performance. (or at least that’s what I imagine it to be as I have never been in a marching band) It’s amazing how you have to remind yourself of your usual routine.

When I was at the Poetry Pharmacy store, I purchased a wonderful card set, called the Emotional Barometer. Many years ago, I attended a workshop that showed how often we don’t know how to describe our own emotions and what they are telling us. In order to get in touch with our own emotions, and in order to have the ability to have empathy for ourselves and for others, we have to get a better description of the myriad of feelings we humans go through in any given day, and what these emotions may be telling us, and what they could mean for us in the way of direction and insight. This card set has a wheel on the front of it, that states twenty different feelings. Today, I considered that here, at this slightly “dazed and confused” moment, I’m feeling kind of “dreamy.”

The corresponding card to “Dreamy” has this to say:

This is like having wonderful cheap therapy in a box!! This wonderful card set/tool box is offered by THESCHOOLOFLIFE.COM I highly recommend this purchase.

Have a great week, friends!! See you tomorrow.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

1979. What TV show do you always watch reruns of?

Monday-Funday

Yesterday, Holiday Mathis wrote about the fact that when you enter into relationships with people, these people don’t come “a la carte”. People are “package deals” with the people they have relationships with, as well. It’s like the old saying, “You don’t just marry the person. You marry the family, too.” I’ve never bought completely into that adage. I think you less marry “the family” but more so, you marry into your person’s relationship to their family and friends, and also your person’s chosen boundaries with said family and friends. So, for instance, you could like someone’s family and friends very much, but not want to spend every weekend with these people. And if your person wants to spend every weekend with these family members and friends, that’s where the conflict lies.

Along this same note, there’s a good expression that Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde are the same person. If someone has really toxic traits that are mean or abusive or destructive, all the flowers and charm and sweet traits and talents, do not cancel out their abusive behaviors. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde are a package deal. Don’t delude yourself with an abusive person, by saying that the “Mr. Hyde parts of him or her, aren’t really them. Dr. Jekyll is the ‘real’ person.” Unfortunately, Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde is a package deal – one and the same.

“All human beings, as we meet them, are commingled out of good and evil: and Edward Hyde, alone, in the ranks of mankind, was pure evil.” – Robert Louis Stevenson

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

2410. What is your favorite sandwich?

Monday – Funday

So, this is Helga Von Tippler, on X. Supposedly, she is made of AI images and I can’t decide which is more fun, checking out her various brightly colored, jewelry adorned “get-ups”, observing her crazy platinum blonde, poofy hairdos, or giggling at her zingy, irreverent one-liners. Here are just a few of her latest comments:

“Hello Police ? Someone stole my weekend! I saw it last on Friday and then “poof” ! It was freakin gone!“

“On HGTV people can flip a whole house in a month . Meanwhile, I’ve been getting ready to vacuum for a week now.“

“Make someone’s day more exciting by texting “on my way” at 7:30 am on a day when you don’t have plans.“

“Porn gives young people an unrealistic and unhealthy idea about how quickly a plumber will come to your house.“

“Dance like no one is watching. Because they’re not. They’re checking their phones.“

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

2030. From elementary through high school, what grade was the hardest for you?

Monday – Funday

Wow. There is nothing else that makes you appreciate your own health and vitality, than when it is taken away from you. I guess that’s the same for anything good in your life that is so dependable. It is easily taken for granted. I don’t know what current strains of viruses are going around right now, but this one around here decided to “take me to the party.” I still can’t hear out of my right ear, all that well, but I am feeling decidedly around the bend. Thank goodness.

Last night I had the most intense dream. (Based on the medical cocktail I’m on right now for my infections, this is probably not unusual.) In my dream, I was visiting this unusual place on a tall, dark black, steep cliff where I had the sense that I had been there previously. I looked up to see, far up on one side of the cliff, that there was an intriguing looking entrance with bright lights and a fire and what looked to be some sort of store or restaurant. It had a very over-the-top, Disney-ish, “assault to the senses” kind of look to it, and yet it was appealing and I had the feeling I had seen it before. It had a name over the entrance. The name was “Umbruch”. I don’t remember much more of the rest of the dream, but “Umbruch” stuck with me. I looked it up before writing the blog . It turns out that “Umbruch” is a German word for “to be in a state of flux, to be undergoing radical change, to be going through a period of upheaval.” (Langenscheidt dictionary)

This empty nest experience, for my husband and I, has definitely had its interruptions, fits and starts. The pandemic brought three of our kids home to live and to study, for a lot of 2020. In 2021, our son who has epilepsy was going through a tough year of regulating his medications, so he spent a lot of time home with us then. Our youngest child, our daughter, left for school in late summer of 2022, but in the meantime my mother-in-law was enduring a long, slow illness that ended in her death in December of 2022, so that was a major part of our focus. In 2023, our daughter came home from college for the summer and she lived with us. This 2024 summer is the first summer, that we have no children living with us since I was 25 years old, as our daughter is studying abroad. This is the first real taste of the “true empty nest.” We definitely have been experiencing “umbruch” for a while now, and I think my subconscious wanted to bring that to my attention. The exciting thing though, is that I did not feel frightened or worried, in my dream. I felt a mix of excitement, curiosity, and anticipation. I was on a steep cliff, yet I had a sense of reassurance that I had been to this place before and that it had ended up to be a great experience. I was excited to climb up to the entrance.

Forgive my indulgence in relaying my dream. I keep this blog mostly as a thought catalog for myself (although I am so grateful that it resonates with my readers!). I read something recently that every major stage in life can be painted as a sad, bitter end, or an exciting, intriguing new beginning. The fact is that every ending is also a new beginning. Umbruch sounds like a scary, challenging place to be, but it also sounds mysterious, energizing and eye-opening. I think that I am excited to explore what it has to offer.

And what I do know for sure is that it is great to be back to writing the blog! See you tomorrow.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

1072. What is your favorite game beginning with the letter N? 

Monday – Funday

Happy Monday. Happy New Week. Wear sunscreen. I have my annual check-up at my dermatologist today and unfortunately, I wasn’t great about my sunscreen usage yesterday. I am preparing myself for a well-deserved lecture.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

2829. Who would you want to sing a song you’ve written?

Monday – Funday

Oprah Winfrey is doing a series on teens and technology. These are some excerpts from the series:

“The reality is that teens are dealing with things that we in previous generations never had to: the dangers of social media, the pressures of selfie culture, the relentless pull of our smartphones.

One of my guests was Jonathan Haidt, an NYU professor and author of the new bestseller The Anxious Generation. His book spells out how Generation Alpha, as they’re known, are paying a hefty price for being the first to grow up with this technology. As Haidt explains it, “We are overprotecting our kids in the real world and underprotecting them online.” Where once kids would go out to meet friends and come home when the streetlights flickered on, they’re now kept “safe” at home, where they’re sucked into their harmful screens.

My other guest was Dr. Becky Kennedy, who has a devoted following for her parenting insights. She had everyone in our audience nodding in agreement when she said: “Kids have been spending more time on their phones, which…is a world of instant gratification with no effort.” As a result, they’ve missed out on “experiencing the grit of the real world, in which you have to put in a lot of effort for delayed gratification at best.” ”

May we, of all ages, remember the healing properties of the natural “real” world, versus the pull of the tech world which we are all sucked into, on a daily basis. May we all find a healthy balance in our lives and may we easily be able to sustain it. May we never underestimate our roots in the natural world.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

2207. What has been your worst haircut/style?

Monday – Funday

credit, @woofknight, X

Only one April’s Fools day did I play a joke on the blog, and then I felt bad for at least five days after that (and maybe even more because I am still writing about it). So this year, no jokes. Happy April! Happy full swing of spring! Happy start to the 2nd quarter of the year!!

“About all you can do in life is be who you are. Some people will love you for you. Most will love you for what you can do for them, and some won’t like you at all.” – Rita Mae Brown

I’ve been mulling around the concept of radical acceptance for a while now. Before you can make any meaningful changes in your life, you must come to a radical acceptance as to how things exactly are, right in this moment. You accept the reality of where you are, in this moment, and everything that comes with this moment – the emotions, the implications, the situations and the people whom you cannot change, and you come to a peace with these elements. You can also come to a radical acceptance of your past – events that have happened, good relationships and bad relationships throughout the years, the fairness and unfairness of life, etc. In short, with radical acceptance, you don’t mull over the unfairness of what could have happened, or the unfairness of what is. When you just utilize “regular acceptance”, this implies resignation and almost agreeing with “giving up” and this is why we often resist acceptance. Regular acceptance feels hopeless and dejected. Radical acceptance faces truth head on, with the idea of looking at your options going forward, with a practical lens. Radical acceptance allows you to clearly feel and to process your feelings about a situation, but then to move forward and to make decisions for your best interests, based on reality. Radical acceptance gives you power.

Unfortunately, we have a tendency to avoid radical acceptance of people and of situations because we don’t want to face things as they are . . . .we wish that things were different. We hang on to hopes that we can change a person, or change a situation, or change what has happened in the past, but these things are impossible. When we avoid radical acceptance, we live in a constant limbo and we dance with the same cycles of disappointment, again and again. When we avoid radical acceptance, we play a part in our own suffering. As hurtful as it can be, to face the pain of “what is” head on, is what will ultimately gives us relief and direction. Radical acceptance stops the ongoing suffering. It allows us to make boundaries and to change our mindset, instead of staying stuck in the mire of frustration and despair.

I’ve put the circle of control on this blog several times, but it bears repeating. When we allow ourselves to experience radical acceptance, we fully understand and accept what is in our control and what is not in our control.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

1011. Name the biggest risk you have ever taken.