inspiration Archives - Page 49 of 79 - Adulting: Second- Half

Friday is Good For U

“When you meet someone who is good for you, they won’t fill you with insecurities by focusing on your flaws. They’ll fill you with inspiration, because they’ll focus on all the best parts of you.” – Colleen Hoover, All Your Perfects

My daughter joined a sorority yesterday. When she was going through rush, one girl told her to pretend that she was lounging on a couch. The girl told my daughter to ask herself, “With what group of girls could you lounge on that couch, and feel most comfortably, happily and easily yourself?” My daughter told me that she found that perfect fit. She found her space on the right couch. And as a woman who is still extremely close to her best seven friends from her own wonderful college sorority, this makes my heart swell with happiness and hope. We women will always need other good women to paddle through life together. It’s in our DNA.

The emphasis here is of course on “good women“, and women and people, in general, who are “good for us.” As the quote says above, the people who are good for us won’t be judgy and overly critical. The people who are good for us will help us to discover our own very best gifts, and how best to utilize these gifts for ourselves and for our world. Judgmental people put up big blocks in relationships. The judgers cause people to get defensive, to shut down (for fear of more criticism), and they encourage others to start honing in on the critical person’s own flaws. (because none of us are flawless) For this reason, judgers often end up being extremely lonely, angry people. The people who are good for you, are just the opposite. These people will cause you to open up, and to bloom, and in this way, they will make you see the beauty in their own lovely, loving, wonderful characters, as well.

Okay, I get it. I’ve gotten off course. I’ve gotten a tad serious for a Friday post. My apologies. As my regular readers know, Fridays are devoted to the frivolous here at the blog. On Fridays, I list a favorite item, website, book, product, etc. that has made my sensory life nothing short of delightful. Please check out previous Friday posts for more of my favorites and please share your favorites, too. We can all have some of the same favorites. Todays favorite: Garlic Expressions Vinaigrette This salad dressing was supposedly created by a “legendary” supper club in Ohio. I love anything that contains garlic, but somehow this supper club encapsulated garlic in the most dreamy, light, liquid form imaginable. I got my first bottle at the Fresh Market, but I noticed that you can also order a bottle on Amazon.

Have a fabulous, frolicky, garlicy weekend! Spend time with the people who are good for you!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Lots of Light

I recently read that the United States has more lighthouses than any other country – more than 700. (Michigan has the most lighthouses, at 129). Figuratively, I suspect that the United States has more “lighthouses” than we could possibly count. I believe that the whole world is filled with “lighthouses.” I have benefited from so many examples of light in my own life, in my own little corner of the world. Who hasn’t?

My horoscope from Holiday Mathis the other day said this: “You’ve been influenced by memorable people. If not for the lasting impression they made, you wouldn’t be following their advice and examples. You’ll now consider how you can create such memories for others.”

It’s so true, isn’t it? In our own lives, so many other lives have served as beacons of light and love and hope, to us. These impressions and examples have only added to our own inner light, which hopefully, in turn, serves as a tall, shining lighthouse to help and to serve others, who may be feeling a little lost at sea. And even our mistakes don’t go to waste. Even our own worst examples of our own darkest selves, can inspire others to desire to be, and to act, nothing like us. That, too, is a good thing, in the long run. Everything that we do, and that we say can be turned into some form of good and light, in the end.

Another thing that I read recently suggested that we spend a lot of time trying to turn the darkness around us into light. This is a waste of time and energy. Our job is to become the light, and thus the lighthouses, that helps to lead others out of the darkness and murkiness, and into the safety of the solid shores, where we can all stand tall and share the light. We just need to shine light on the darkness around us and when we do this, we see that the darkness was mostly a mistake, made of our own whirling fears and uncertainty, which made us turn away from the light that is always there.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Today’s Mantra

These are the memes that spoke to me from Twitter today. I read also on Twitter that Harry Styles is extremely upset about what people are putting out on social media about his girlfriend, Olivia Wilde. He said this about Twitter: “a s***storm of people trying to be awful to people.”

I think Harry is right. Social media can be extremely negative, harmful, mean and bullying. It can also be filled with inspiration, beauty, and wisdom. It’s what you look for in anything, that makes it so. Most people, places, and things are just neutral. We put the meaning and stories and attention into/on the item, or the person, or the relationship to these people, places and things. What is terrible for me, might be wonderful for you. The key is to put the focus on what is wonderful for you.

Are you letting yourself be loved, you grumpy little shit? Earlier this week, I got a root canal and honestly, I haven’t felt this good in quite some time. I realize I had been walking around, ignoring a growing, gnawing problem (literally in my head) that I was hoping would magically just disappear. Most of the time, life doesn’t work this way though, right? Our bodies, and our emotions send signals which grow louder and louder, for a purpose. They are saying, “Let yourself be loved, you grumpy little shit!”

Truthfully, I have more energy and vitality than I have felt in a while. I had the infection removed and my whole body is sighing with relief. My husband read that in the 1800s, people had a higher average body temperature than we have these days, because many people walked around with low-lying infections and diseases that could not be remedied. We have so many remedies these days for so many problems. Are you utilizing the remedies that are needed for your own mind, your own body, and your own spirit?

Today’s mantra is “Let yourself be loved, your grumpy little shit.” (and this means putting a big emphasis on showing love to yourself in your every waking moment, and in every decision that you make for yourself. Love and gratitude radiates outward from a healthy, loving heart. We will all benefit from your healing.)

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Letting Go Again

“Don’t be sad – Autumn is nature’s way of showing us how beautiful letting go can be.” – James Norbury

I love autumn. I live in Florida. “Summer” is like the rest of the states’ “winter” here in Florida. Summer is the season which most of us Floridians count down the days for it to soon be over. In summer in Florida, you won’t see most of us natives outside, except for the wee hours of the morning, or until it is dark, unless of course, we are floating in a body of water. There’s lots of water here. Yes, I love autumn.

This autumn will punctuate letting go for me, more than perhaps any other autumn in my life. Last Thursday, my once chaotic, full of noise and action, sometimes “bursting apart at the seams” fluffy, homey nest became officially empty, as we watched my youngest two children drive off to their shared university. Sigh. This “letting go” lesson will never go away during our lifetimes, will it? The thing that we most have to let go of in life, is probably the kneejerk reaction to stubbornly revolt against letting go.

“Oh, honey, once you get into your fifties, your “Check Engine” light comes on more and more. Get used to it.” – Theresa, the pulls-no-punches receptionist at my dentist’s office, who pulled strings to get me into the endodontist yesterday. Bless her wise and practical heart.

I had my first root canal yesterday. I was fine with letting go of the nerves of that molar. I feel surprisingly good today. These endodontists seem to have this treatment down to a science these days. The root canal honestly didn’t hurt, and the pain relief is such a blessing. Whenever I experience the intense pain of a toothache, or an earache, etc. I gain new pounds of compassion (see, my extra pounds are just compassion pounds) for people who live with unending pain every single day. I can’t imagine trying to go about your business when your intense pain is constantly screaming at you.

While I was in the waiting room of the endodontist, I got to talking to an older woman who was sitting near to me. She told me not to worry. She’s done fine with all of her root canals. However, what was really tough for this woman is that she had just survived, in her own words, a “heartbreak heart attack.” She suffered a heart attack right after her beloved dog of thirteen years died in her arms. She assured me that “heartbreak heart attacks” are a real thing. She didn’t have to convince me. Those of us who love hard and deep, have vulnerable hearts.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Monday-Funday

I can’t write much this morning. I have to go see about a tooth. It appears that there is a root canal in my future. (sigh) If my writing appears erratic this week, know that it is because I am either in horrific pain, or I am extraordinarily loopy on pain drugs. Could be interesting . . . . I hope that your week is starting out better than mine.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Soul Sunday

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Good morning. Welcome to Poetry Day on the blog. Last night was excruciating for me. I woke up with a ferocious toothache that was insistent that I stay awake and miserable for the entirety of the night. The toothache made it perfectly clear that it had no plans to allow me to get any real sleep. I’ve been ignoring the flashing, yellow caution light that’s been quietly, yet pointedly announcing itself, all this week, on the left hand side of my mouth, with my pie-in-the-sky hopes that maybe it would “just go away.” Ha! The chicken has come home to roost, and she is one mad hen.

When you are experiencing a lot of pain, you try to look for the bright sides, such as the fact that at least Advil and Orajel exist. You think back to what it would have looked like to have had one of these horrific toothaches in the middle ages. You remind yourself about just how much worse it could be, even as the dull, yet sharp ache bangs and bangs and bangs, making the entire side of your face feel like its getting heartily beaten up, by a determined amateur boxer, in the inside of your mouth.

I think that this poet describes a toothache perfectly. Who knew that you could turn a toothache into poetry? It goes to show, everything can be poetry.

Alive With Color

Yesterday I sent flowers to a loved one who has been through hell these last couple of months. I called a florist whom I do not know, in a state where I do not live, and I explained the nightmare our loved one has gone through with her health. I asked the florist to create something cheerful, bright and really special. He said to me confidently, “Don’t worry. I got you.”

And that fabulous florist delivered handsomely. Yes, those are even bananas in the arrangement!! Bananas! Our loved one is thrilled with the flowers, and I am thrilled with this florist. I absolutely adore people who are intimately involved and prideful and passionate about their work. It always shows. When people do what they love, the results are amazing. The love shines through.

On the topic of flowers, my friend told me about an organization in our town that delivers recycled flowers (or unsold flowers donated by our local grocery chain) to people in hospitals and care homes all over the country. Another friend of mine, who is downsizing, just donated a plethora of vases to this wonderful organization. As I did an online search, it turns out there are quite a few of these wonderful entities that do this lovely service for their communities. Below are three of them. They all need volunteers to make the arrangements, and to deliver the arrangements and they also happily accept donations such as the vases my friend just gave to them.

There is a garden of good in this world. And it is flowering with people who make a difference in the lives of others. The love shines through.

Random Acts of Flowers

Welcome to the Power of Flowers Project!

Home

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

PinkLionDog Friday

Happy Friday to my wonderful friends and readers!! Welcome to the best day of the week. Fridays are frivolous and fun here at the blog. On Fridays, I discuss a product, or a website, or a song – a whatever that has added sparkle to my own life. In short, Fridays are about the things which have helped to make my own life more interesting and intriguing. Please check out previous Friday posts to find out about some more of my favorites. Who knows? Perhaps some of my favorites, could become some of your own favorites, too!

Today’s favorite is a Florida artist whose art I totally adore! And I am not the only one. Paige Gemmell has done partnerships with stationery companies (Caspari), Spartina, Anthropologie, and she even has her artwork printed on lingerie! Go check out prints you can buy, and other products that have her artwork printed on them, at her wonderful Etsy store: PinkLionDog

https://www.etsy.com/shop/PinkLionDog?ref=simple-shop-header-name&listing_id=51607158

Make this Friday a grand entrance into a fabulous weekend. Make this Friday simmer with excitement, anticipation, expectancy, and sultry suspense. Make this Friday one of the best of your life. You have that power to steer your ship in that direction. Do it.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Just Me and Him

Today’s the real deal. My daughter having started college with summer classes was just a trial run. I convinced myself that she was just away at summer camp. Plus, my son was home all summer with us, doing a summer internship. Today, my youngest son and my daughter are headed up to their university for the fall semester. Today is the first time in twenty-six years, that our household is truly whittled down to just me and him (and three crazy dogs).

My sister-in-law has been going through and digitizing old family pictures and yesterday, she sent a new set of them. One of the pictures was of two cute, young twenty-somethings, at the back of a limo, headed to their honeymoon. Just me and him.

Little did we know, that from that limo ride, a lifetime of spectacular adventures awaited us, raising a large family with an expanding vision, with a prideful energy and sometimes living on just a wing and a prayer. Just me and him (and our big brood).

It’s kind of like we are back in the back of that limo today. Only this time, it’s our kids ahead of us on the road, waving happily back at us, as they move on forward in their own directions towards the lives of their own dreams. I imagine that we are sitting back there in our cushioned seats of the limo, imagining this next coming stage in our shared lives, with an expanding vision, a prideful energy, fully knowing and better understanding that some of it will have to be lived on a wing and a prayer. We are full of trepidation, yet also excitement and anticipation. Just like the last ride in the back of the limo almost 28 years ago, we are ready as we can be. Just me and him.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Mean Girls

Last week, a young woman who was a student at the high school where all of my children graduated from, took her own life. While, of course, suicide has a lot of complicating factors, it was well known by the student population that this popular, talented young woman was being bullied by, and ostracized from her friend group. Something about a boy . . . .

“The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies.” – Unknown

We teach the younger generations not by what we say and lecture about, but more so by what we do in our own lives and how we behave on an every day basis.

“The life you lead is the lesson you teach.” – Marie Humphrey

So many lives have been forever hurt by this awful tragedy. Not only will this young woman’s family and true friends have to live with this horrific loss forever, but the girls who bullied her will have to live with this taint on own their lives forevermore. Where did these girls learn bullying? Where did they learn gossiping and ganging up? Where do “Mean Girls” come from?

We help the world when we heal ourselves. It doesn’t feel good to be a mean girl at any stage in life, and it doesn’t feel good to be a target of mean girls during any stage of our lives. Meanness comes from a feeling of insecurity and lack. Happy, contented people are not mean people. Meanness is wearing your wounds like a tattoo, for the world to see. Kind, secure, confident women raise kind, secure, confident women. May we all aim to be these healthy, highest forms of womankind.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.