Blog

When my four children were younger, they all played a lot of different sports on a lot of different teams. We spent most of our weekends traveling from one sporting event, to another. My second son, in particular, was devoted to soccer, so we understand the ins and outs of travel soccer, extremely well.

It occurred to me this week, that I never really enjoyed “blow out” games. We often would wake up early in the morning and travel several hours and sit in the blazing sun, for the enjoyment of watching young men and young women really hone their skills, and to play at highly competitive levels. Blow out games offered nothing to either team and their players, nor to the bystanders watching the games. In blow out games, one team was completely humiliated and annihilated, and the winning team was not even challenged at all. These blow out games never allowed for anyone on either team to really grow and to become better and to learn from one another. These games often felt pointless and discouraging and embarrassing. One team often got overinflated in their perceived greatness, and yet disappointed, like the deflating feeling of getting a trophy, for just participating. The defeated team often got too discouraged and they sometimes lost their vision and drive for future improvement.

On the other hand, when two teams played, who were highly matched in skills and talent, the games were always close. The endings of these games were always nail-biters. Both teams had a excellent chance to win the game, and they put everything they had into winning it. Despite the stress, and sometimes even when being a fan of the team that ended up losing, these close games were the best kinds of games for the kids to play in, and for the people to watch. All of the team members from both teams, usually (even if just in secret) had great respect for each other, and for each other’s abilities. The players knew they had played other players who were excellent, and devoted players, and who were just as eager and fervent to excel and to win. Each player, at each position, brought out the best of their opponent, and they all became better players for challenging each other to play at the highest level of the game. Sometimes fights broke out during these tense games. Sometimes there were calls for cheating and rough play because the energy of the game was so cutthroat. Still, in their respective huddles, the teams appreciated the stealth and the abilities of their opponents. They knew that by playing the opposing team, in a hard won battle, they had become better players themselves, and they were grateful for the opportunity to grow and to improve. Often the players would learn techniques and strategies from each other’s plays, and utilize those techniques in their future competitions. There is no doubt, in my mind, that the hardest won games, the games that came down to the very wire, were the best for everyone involved (despite my shot nerves and quickly beating heart). I never doubted this fact, even during those tough times, when I had to cheer up my own defeated and discouraged player, on the long ride home.

“I’ve failed over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” – Michael Jordan

“Do you know what my favorite part of the game is? The opportunity to play.” -Mike Singletary