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Reminder: It’s A Wonderful Life

“What I don’t like about office parties, is looking for a job the next day.” – Phyllis Diller

We have my husband’s company Christmas party tonight. I thought that the above quote was hilarious, but I have no intention of getting him fired. We need his job.

My husband and I watched It’s a Wonderful Life again last night. I had so many observations this go-around, watching it. First of all, I actually found Jimmy Stewart to be sort of handsome in the movie. I don’t know if this is an aging thing, or what, but that surprised me. The movie was made in 1946, the year that my parents were born. The cars, the telephones, the clothes, the hairstyles, the manner of speaking, etc. in the movie, looked so impossibly antique, more so than ever to me! Again, an aging thing?!? Although It’s a Wonderful Life was a box office disappointment, it was nominated for five academy awards and it is usually in the American Film Institute’s list of top 20 American films, ever made. In 2007, it was considered the most inspirational American movie ever made. Even with it being a black and white film and getting old enough to seemingly be from a different world, the message that the movie makes is still so resonating. The point of It’s a Wonderful Life is that everyone matters. Every life makes such a difference in other people’s lives, in ways that are so intricate and complicated, that without that one person’s life, everything would be different for everyone else. Jimmy Stewart’s character is on the brink of suicide, considering himself a financial failure, yet when his guardian angel shows him how different life would have been for all of those he loves without him, he realizes the value of life in itself. He realizes his own true value and the very significant, important, holy meaning of his own life. By the end of the movie, he opens up his eyes to see, just how much he is loved.

“Being rich means having something money can’t buy.” – FofF

Friday Farkle

“Happiness is a day. It’s called Friday.” – UpJourney

Ring the Bell! An Angel has gotten its wings!! Friday is the Angel of the Week, right?!? Happy Friday!!! One of my babies comes home from college today. Yay!! That makes it an extra special Friday!! Life is good – especially on Fridays! Readers, I keep it real surface-y on Fridays. I call it “Favorite Things Friday” and I list three favorite things, websites, songs, beauty products etc. that I just love! I encourage you to check out previous Fridays for other favorites and please also comment on your favorite things, that have helped make your life extra special. Without further ado . . . . .

SNL Youtube “Turtleneck” skit with Dane Cook – This skit makes me laugh until I cry. When we lived up north, I would always make my sons wear those adorable wool Christmas sweaters because they were, well, adorable. And the boys were miserable!! We would go to Christmas at my grandparents’ house and my grandparents liked to keep it real balmy, in their house. Before you knew it, all three boys (daughter not born yet) would itch their sweaters right off and strip down to their undershirts, like they were auditioning for Chippendales. Anyway, who couldn’t use a laugh at this point in the season?? Check it out.

Cat Cosmetics Lip Gloss – Rich – Who doesn’t like rich? Remember Catherine Hickland who played in Knight Rider? Well, she still looks great and she has this fabulous make-up line! I have bought this lip gloss for years. I love the consistency and the fabulous sheen and color. I’ve tried others and nothing compares. I keep coming back to it. It is sort of an iridescent, peachy, pinky shade, but there are all sorts of good shades to choose from. Catherine also writes a fun blog and does great make-up tutorials. Check it out.

Ghirardelli Peppermint Bark Collection – Why doesn’t Ghirardelli offer this candy crack all year long? Actually, it’s a good thing that they don’t. I’d weigh 500 pounds and be severely malnourished. Eating these chocolates (by the bagful) is perhaps on my list of 5 Top Holiday experiences, every year. I try other peppermint bark, and it’s good, but nothing compares to this San Francisco sensation. I mean, I’ll never turn down any peppermint bark, ever, but still this stuff is still the ultimate! Check it out, but save some for me.

Okay, readers! Give me 5 minutes to list your favorites. A lot of us need ideas for last-minute gifts!! (I hope I’m not alone in this.)

“Shake Your Pom Poms – It’s Friday” – SoloQuotes

Holiday Hottie

Recently I read this question/answer in Quora. The questioner asked, “What age is considered middle age?” The best voted answer came from a writer named Rufus Evison. He said, “It keeps changing. The important thing is not to give up making an effort. If you are resting on your laurels and getting fatter, that is middle age.”

The truth hurts. Today I am making an effort. I am going into the salon for my pre-holiday beauty refresh. I will be there for hours and hours. That is definitely a sign of middle age for women – the older you are, the longer you will spend in the hair salon. We have a couple of holiday parties coming up this weekend and I am making my effort to try to look like I am just at the early stages of middle age. I’m going to try to make the hours and hours spent in the salon today, look more like an “effortless, popped out of bed, looking this way” freshness at the parties. Ha!

In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve mentioned eating cookies and other holiday treats a lot in my blog, in recent weeks. Ugh. It shows. And I don’t live up north, so I can’t hide those few extra pounds in clothing layers, bulky Christmas sweaters and oversized coats. Double ugh. I wish that these parties were costume parties with themes like Best Jolly Santa or Fattest Frosty.

I read once that you can look completely “finished” if you just put your hair in a neat, tidy, nape pony tail, wear over-sized sunglasses and bright lipstick. That’s been my “go-to” look lately. That, or baseball caps, or even just my warm, fuzzy robe, have been the “holiday look” for me, so far. I get that these are pretty weak laurels to rest on, Rufus. So, it’s off to the salon, I go. If I really want to look younger than middle age and look like a “holiday hottie”, I may have to stay at the salon throughout the holidays, and be ready just in time for the New Year’s Eve celebrations. Hmmmmmm . . . .

Frozen

“For Christmas this year, try giving less. Start with less attitude. There’s more than enough of that in the world as it is — and people will usually just give it back anyway!” — Anne Bristow

I’m in a frozen state right now. I’m in Florida and it is cold for Florida, but it is not frozen. What I mean is that I’m in that state of mind, when I am so overwhelmed thinking about what needs to get done before the holidays, that I’m essentially frozen. I am doing nothing constructive towards what really needs to be done and allowing myself to be totally sidetracked by completely inconsequential tidbits, that have absolutely nothing to do with the holidays. I’m in a state of frozen-ness with my heart rate pumping, my mouth drying, sucking down way too much coffee and yet I can’t seem to get a game plan down and then, to take any sort of action towards that game plan. I like to think that I’m not the only mouse getting distracted by with what to do with my cookies. Am I right?

It’s times like these that I feel like cursing the maker of “The Elf on the Shelf.” My teenage daughter still looks for the elf’s new location every day and doesn’t hide her disappointment when the elf remains frozen in its same spot, day after day. Maybe our elf is comfortable where he landed. Maybe our elf doesn’t need to be-bop all over the house, but just wants to sit in a still, holy peace during the holidays. Maybe our elf is in the same “frozen state of mind” that I’m in. He is getting old.

Seriously, whoever came up with the “Elf on the Shelf” is probably now a multi-millionaire by giving the rest of us another guilt-induced chore during Christmastime. Wow. That’s the Christmas spirit. Here’s my idea. I am going to become a travel planner for elves. Next year all of our elves are going to be away for the holidays but if you pay me $29.95, I’ll make sure that your elf sends his kids a post card from Monaco.

Okay, even reading this over, I can see that I have a bad, Grinchy attitude today. Time to thaw my frozen state. I don’t want to be on the naughty list. Speaking of lists, I have a Christmas to-do list to get to, and maybe even actually cross one or two items off that list, for a little peace of mind. I’ll get to that after I fill up my coffee cup, grab a cookie and read up on the latest news about Meghan Markle.

Llamas, Sloths and Gnomes

Every year, there seems to be a few particularly popular symbols or creatures and true to American form, we take that character and run with it. We put it on everything from towels, to soaps, to cups, to garden accessories, to underwear. This year I have seen a lot of llamas, sloths and those cute, little gnomes, in which the only thing that you can see is their adorable little ball of a nose, sticking out from under their pointy hats. At Christmas time, these items seem to multiply, and usually with little holiday additions, like holly berries and some tinsel, to add to their charm.

I have not been immune to this craze. I have a couple of sloth accessories, several llama trinkets and about 500 versions of the nose gnome. I’ve loved gnomes since I was a kid and this particular version is extremely irresistible to me.

When my husband and I were first married, we became friends with a Swedish family, who came to America for a couple of years, on a work visa. Our Swedish friends said that one of the things that struck them the most about America, was the overwhelming abundance of choices, when it came to just about anything. They said that they even found toothpaste shopping to be stressful, due to the plethora of brands and flavors.

It’s easy to be a collector of just about anything in America. There are so many options available. I think that this is something that many of us take for granted. Truthfully, some of us take this American perk, a little too far, thus the TV show, Hoarders. Every once in a while, I make myself watch that show, just to keep myself in check. I don’t want my readers to watch that show someday and see me buried in a pile of llama, sloth and big-nosed gnome trinkets. I want to still be able to get to my computer and to write. Plus, I want to still have plenty of room for objects portraying the new “in” symbol of cuteness, every single year.

That Was Fast

Today is my youngest son’s 18th birthday. Out of my four children, I only have one baby who isn’t technically an adult. I have three “adult children.” I remember for years when older women would comment on my kids’ cuteness, I would politely ask them if they had children and they would say something like, “Yes . . . well I mean, they’re all grown up now.” When you are in that younger mom stage of life, you never imagine that you’ll be that older mom stammering out an awkward answer to the question, “Do you have kids?” Yet, now, I am that awkward older woman with four, mostly grown children.

I have even more compassion for that older mother now. That older mother has seen a lot. She’s been through a lot of joys and sorrows, and hopes and fears. She’s had experiences that she never imagined having, raising those kids to adulthood. She’s filled with pride, joy, amazement, relief, nostalgia and wonder. She’s filled with hope, awe, curiosity and questions of what to do next. She thought that maybe when the kids were older, she wouldn’t feel so vulnerable, but she now has come to the wisdom that her heart is walking around on multiple sets of legs, and those legs are walking farther away, going on Life’s wild adventures, leaving her heart even more exposed than maybe it has ever been before.

So now, when a sweet, beautiful, frazzled young mother politely asks me if I have children, I say, “Yes, I have four mostly grown-up children. And they are wonderful. Enjoy and savor your babies. They are your most amazing, miraculous co-creation with Life.”

Explore. Dream. Discover.

I’m heading home now from my magical weekend. The place that I visited was on my bucket list for deeply personal and spiritual reasons. It exceeded my expectations in all regards and has brought a sense of wholeness to that part of my being that has always yearned to experience this spot, from my family history.

I used to hate the term “bucket list” but now I am inspired by it. As I have gotten older and wiser, everything in my life has become more meaningful and pertinent. Everything. The maturity and ripeness that comes with middle age, brings everything to a more full-color appreciation and for that, I am truly grateful.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

Turned On By Off

“You avoid the overcrowding of tourist locations by traveling in off-season. That is now one of the major rules of smart travel – go when the tourists are NOT there, and even though you may have to don an extra layer of clothing, you will enjoy the sights and the experiences at the destination in the way that they were enjoyed before they became so well-known.” – Arthur Frommer

My husband and I have taken a couple of these romantic, long- weekend trips this year and we’ve ended up in major tourist areas, in their off-seasons. I would like to pretend that this is because we are smart travelers like Arthur Frommer, but truth be told, these time periods were just the best for our family schedule. However, we have found that the above statement is the absolute truth. Our trips have allowed us to enjoy long conversations with locals – these conversations are rich with stories and anecdotes, history, and good tips and ideas about the best-kept secret spots, of the locale. We haven’t had to wait in long lines for anything. We have always gotten tables at the restaurants we have wanted to try and rooms in the places that we have wanted to stay in. We have gotten our souvenirs at amazing, discounted prices and we even have gotten access to private beaches and farms that would never have been available to us during the prime season. The best part is that the locals actually seem to like us, because they have forgotten how annoying, brash, and demanding, the tourists can be during the height of the travel season. We have had the space to breathe and the peace of mind that comes from this space, to really soak in and savor our adventures.

So what this tells me, is that there is another perk of aging, and that perk is the freedom to do more travel, and to do it with a little more wisdom and panache. In writing this blog, I’m starting to come to the understanding that there really are a lot of good things that come out of being more seasoned, aged and ripe, in life. The Second Half isn’t half bad!

It Has Arrived – Friday

“Happy Friday! Here’s to all of us who made it through another week of faking adulthood!” – Nanea Hoffman

Happy Friday!!! Woohoo!!!! I treated last night like Friday night. That’s why I’m a little late to the game. Plus, I miss my mega monitor. The people who work at our beautiful, artsy little hotel here are wonderful suck-ups. They told me and my husband that we were are like super fun, good-looking models. We must be at Fantasy Island – models for Cialis commercials, maybe. I think that is one of the good points in aging. Younger people start thinking that making you feel good could be “their good deed for the day.”

My new favorite flavor of cookie has to be Pumpkin Spice Chocolate Snickerdoodle. I have sucked down three of them as I write this. New readers, Fridays are casual here at Adulting -Second Half. We keep it light and superficial. I list three favorite items, songs, books, etc. that make my life even more of a good life. I encourage you to do the same in the Comments section. Also, check out previous Fridays for other good ideas for ways to make your life even more of a good life, too!

I’m in a wonderful, cold Christmas-y location. It got me thinking of my three favorite Christmas carols. Now, Christmas music can get old fast. After a few weeks of Christmas music wafting through the air of every space you breathe in, one can start to feel a little edgy and Scrooge-y, for sure. However, these three renditions of Christmas songs are so good, I sometimes listen to them in July, with my convertible top down. Ugh, I bet you are thinking “Don’t Be that Guy!”. I know. I know. But I’m “That Lady”, plus I’m getting old enough that young people are starting to suck up to me, so I can get away with more now.

“Oh Holy Night” Martina McBride’s rendition – If you are tired of the crass commercialism that sometimes has a way that of wafting into the season and quickly taking over, take three big breaths and listen. My Goodness, this woman sings so beautifully!! This rendition still gives me shivers and makes my neck hairs stand up straight and tall. I would put this up with Whitney Houston singing the National Anthem.

“Mary’s Boy Child” – Boney M.’s rendition – If you want to feel like you are in the Caribbean for Christmas, as you are scraping ice off of your windshield, pop this tune into your ear buds. I heard this song for the first time ago, decades ago on an obscure radio station. It made me feel instantly happy and like I should be dancing in a coconut bra. Back then, we didn’t have a glimmer of services like Shazam, so I called the radio station, talked to the DJ and in the end, had to order the CD from Germany. But it was worth it. The song is that good.

“Last Christmas” – George Michael – When George Michael first came on to the scene, everyone fell in love with him – men, women and children. I was a kid and my friend’s mother couldn’t stop swooning over the gorgeousness of this man. This is the Christmas song that my kids love washing the dishes to – it really does add to the productivity of our household and nothing brings a bigger smile to my heart than hearing my kids singing along to this song and knowing that I will be walking into a clean kitchen soon after.

Okay, time to be getting back to my wonderful adventure. May you have wonderful adventures this weekend, too, my beloved readers and friends!!

“If showing up in a robe and a tiara with a box of wine is wrong, then maybe I don’t fully comprehend how Casual Friday actually works.” – Abby Has Issues

Letting Myself Be Lived

I’m posting this in the wee, small hours of the morning, today. I’m headed out on an adventure this weekend. I’ve been pining for this adventure for a while, but considering our loss of our beautiful dog, Lacey, I realize that I need this adventure more than ever. Change of scenery is a good cure, for a home full of constant reminders of who you are missing.

I’ll be writing my blog away from home for the first time since I started writing it. My husband bought me a new computer and this enormous, curved monitor when we both started to realize that me writing my blog was no longer a whim or a passing fancy, but more of a necessary passion of mine, here to stay. I’m going to miss the “Big Screen”, but I fully intend to continue to blog every morning. I’m not sure how much, or if and when, I will choose to share my stories about my adventure, but I’m definitely taking my computer along for the ride.

I love the anticipation of trips. I read recently that if you stress too much about something before it happens, you are actually putting yourself through that stress, two times. I like to think then, that it follows, if you are eager about heading out on an adventure, you are putting yourself through the excitement, twice! I don’t have any expectations for this getaway other than an eager interest in the unknown and the prospect of surprise. I’m going somewhere that I have never been to, and that is my favorite kind of experience.

When I go on trips, I don’t have a set agenda. I won’t be crestfallen if I don’t see certain museums or landmarks or shows. My favorite part of exploring new areas, is the overall ambiance. I love to observe and soak in, the atmosphere – the people, the preferences, the smells, the sounds, the shared community’s prides and loves, the food, the weather, etc. all related to the place that is new to me. Every place has its own nuances. Every place is like a world unto its own. This doesn’t only apply to faraway places, in distant lands. Every city is broken down into neighborhoods and smaller towns that are distinctly their own places, rich with culture and quirks, quite individual to that “place within a place.” Even unique homes and families are their own corners of the world. I’m good at letting go and letting Life explore itself, through me, when I go on outings, exploits and trips. Maybe that is why I love adventures so much – they are the times in my life that I completely let go, and let myself Be Lived.