Brutally Indescribable

I was reading an article that said that the Dutch people have about 700 new words in their lexicon, all related to the coronavirus. Here is just a few of them:

Huidhonger / skin hunger: a longing for human contact while in isolationAnderhalvemetereconomie / six-feet-economy: an economy constructed to avoid spreading coronavirusHoestschaamte / cough-shame: the anxiety one may experience about possibly triggering a panic among the people nearby when making a coughing sound for whatever reasonCoronahufter / coronajerk: shopper at a supermarket or store who violates the six-foot social distance prescription or other safe-keeping protocol.Druppelcontact / spray-contact: exchange of little droplets when sneezing or coughing, esp. as source of infectionOnthamsteren / dehoarding: processing long-stored shelf-stable food into a meal.Straatschaamte / street-shame: the embarrassment someone experiences when being out for urgently necessary errands during lockdownToogviroloog / blather-virologist: dilettante who spreads false or unsubstantiated information about the virus, its transmission, or its treatment (CNN)

This isn’t a new thing. I read this in an article about how wars have brought new words and new meanings to words, into our regular, every day vernacular.

Through wars, some words have changed or garnered new meanings while others were newly coined for specific places and things. During the Civil War, “skedaddle” became “skeet” or “scoot.”

In World War I, the word “lousy,” which was intended to describe lice infestations, came to mean weary. In the same token, “trench coat” — a jacket worn in the trenches during battle — to this day remains an iconic outerwear style. “Jeep” came from the letters “G.P.” emblazoned on the side of each general purpose vehicle used during World War II.”- (Business Insider)

Why do we create new words, particularly in hard times such as wars and pandemics?

The same article says this:

War words are often invented to describe things that are brutally indescribable, bring humor to things that are not funny, and create designations for things that are otherwise unidentifiable.” (Business Insider)

I think that is why I love writing. It is the act of trying to describe, to put meaning to, to bring a familiar understanding, and to even bring humor out of an all-encompassing experience. Writing tries to bring order and sense and logic and description and familiarity and emotional inclusion, to any striking event in our lives. The other creative arts do the same thing. A photographer tries to capture the emotion, the beauty, the total awesomeness of one single moment. The same can be said for the works of an artist, a musician, a film maker or a dancer. The creative arts try to translate life, so that the precious moments are not forgotten. There is an argument that the minute you pin a description or a meaning or a perspective on to an experience or on to an object, you have lost the essence of just experiencing it. You have limited your experience. You have diminished the object. That may be the case, but there is still great satisfaction in trying to cage in any happening, with emotional description (which is what I think, creativity really is). The creative product is the leftover heavy pebbles, as the constant movement, of the stream of change, moves forward rapidly into the distant unknown. As travelers, we can pick up the pebbles and have a remembrance of where we have been, what we have felt. We get a small glimpse, of a standstill of one moment, of any one experience. We get to pick up a pebble, put it in our pocket, and thus, we get to keep a tiny sliver of any one particular major (or minor) experience, on our person, forever.

The Force and Garden Eels

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“How your life feels is more important that how it looks.” – Think Smarter

How is everyone feeling today, readers? I am taking another temperature check. You’ve been a little quiet out there. How’s the force within you? It is pulsating or is it a tad weak? Whatever it is, it’s okay. Do what feels best.

Silence may be as variously shaded as speech. – Edith Wharton

https://www.bbc.com/news/newsbeat-52500113?campaign_id=9&emc=edit_nn_20200504&instance_id=18202&nl=the-morning&regi_id=121107475&segment_id=26556&te=1&user_id=8d9827cde5758c7f510b01ae213d8966

I really enjoyed the above news story reported by the BBC. It turns out the Sumida Aquarium in Tokyo needed help with some interaction with its Garden Eels. Garden Eels know quite a bit about isolating, as they rarely ever leave the burrows, in the sand, that they live in. Isolation is their regular way of life. The Eels that live in the Sumida Aquarium were forgetting what humans looked like and were shyly staying buried in their burrows instead of peeking out. Their keepers were worried about them and they were having trouble monitoring the little eels’ health. Their solution to this problem? They set up iPads with cameras and asked people to come “look” at their garden eels, to keep them used to human faces and to human interaction. Watch the video. It’s strangely calming.

A sad-looking garden eel

So, my little garden eels, how are you doing really? What “takes” have you gotten from all of this isolation? Are you starting to poke your heads out a little bit more? Are you feeling scared and wanting to stay buried in the comforts of your own burrows? Whatever you are feeling, it’s all okay. And it’s all going to be okay.

Sunday Soul

Hi readers. I’m terribly sorry to be late posting today. Sundays are a big readership day for me and I appreciate that fact. I think people like poetry more than they pretend to like it. I’m late because I got myself involved in a “little” painting job this weekend. I decided to paint some window panes. The job seemed simple and painless, enough. Ha! I decided to complete the finishing touches this morning before the hot Florida sun baked even more dark bronze-y paint into my skin. I look like a leopard.

New readers, Sundays are devoted to poetry here at Adulting – Second Half. Poetry is the unedited, free-flowing sounds of our souls. I already got my creative juices out by painting this morning, so I am going to reprint a poem today, that you may have seen already. The poem has gone viral and many believed that it was written by an author during the 1919 Pandemic. Alas, this is not true. It was actually written in March of 2020 by a chaplain from Wisconsin named Kitty O’Meara. It is untitled and it is beautiful. Please add your poems (your writings or someone else’s writings) to the Comments section. Here is the lovely words of a very much alive, Kitty O’Meara:

By Kitty O’Meara
And the people stayed home.
And read books, and listened, and rested,
and exercised, and made art, and played games,
and learned new ways of being, and were still.
And listened more deeply.
Some meditated, some prayed, some danced.
Some met their shadows.
And the people began to think differently.
And the people healed.
And, in the absence of people living in ignorant,
dangerous, mindless, and heartless ways,
the earth began to heal.
And when the danger passed, and the people joined together again,
they grieved their losses, and made new choices, and dreamed new images,
and created new ways to live and heal the earth fully,
as they had been healed.

Friday! Friday! Friday!

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Happy Friday! Happy May Day! Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit!! (we’ll take all the luck we can get these days, right?) Happy Favorite Things Friday!! I’m so happy that it is Friday. Aren’t you?? As you know, I love Fridays. New readers, Fridays are light and on the surface here at Adulting – Second Half. On Fridays, I discuss three items, books, songs, beauty products etc. that have made my material life more special and I ask you to share some of your favorites in the Comments section. For more favorites, please see previous Friday posts. Here are today’s favorites:

“I Believe” by Moon Dog Mane – This song is my number one favorite for today. The other day I went for a mind-clearing drive with my convertible top down and this song came on and all at once, me, my car, my driving and all of my emotions became one with this song. I turned the volume all of the way up and I jammed. Yes, I jammed. Now, typically I think that it is a very obnoxious move when people play their music so loud, forcing everybody else to listen to their own musical tastes, and at high volume. But, at that moment, I was outpouring, and this song just felt like it was the anthem for everything that we’ve all been going through. And I needed to feel it, and I needed to share it. And happily, there were a lot of people who agreed with me, on that day. I got the thumbs up from a few motorcyclists, a couple of teenagers walking on the side of the road, some landscapers and even an old lady and her poodle. We were all jamming to this tune. I have unofficially named Moon Dog Mane’s “I Believe”, the anthem of the coronavirus situation. “I Believe” that it’s just the right song for what we are all feeling and what we are all going through. Play it right now. Bang your head, put your arms up in the air and feel the strength of the conviction that “Everything Will Be Alright!”

Lithops – These darling succulents look like tiny little colorful stones (kind of like Fruity Pebbles). Lithops originated in Africa, but I got mine from a seller on Etsy. They are tiny and they are so sweet and adorable. If you are a succulent lover, treat yourself to a little sprinkling of these little babies, to make your heart happy. I have purchased a few of my succulents from sellers on Etsy and I have never been disappointed.

My third favorite is a great video from Angie of Hot and Flashy YouTube video fame. Hot and Flashy is a series of videos featuring helpful beauty tips, particularly for middle-aged women, and the above video is especially helpful and apropos for today’s times. Despite the fact that Angie, the creator and the host of Hot and Flashy is stunningly beautiful, she is so down-to-earth and real and honest about what she does to maintain her looks, that you can’t help but to love her and to appreciate her. With all of this time staying at home, it is a good time to experiment with your hotness and your flashiness. Own it, ladies. And have a great weekend!!!!

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The Healing

“Nobody tells you this but sometimes the healing hurts more than the wound.” – Think Smarter, Twitter

Think Smarter nailed it once again. I remember when I gave birth to my first child. He was nine pounds, which a baby that size was much less common, over twenty years ago. Of course, going into labor and giving birth to my son was quite painful, but no one prepared me for the fact that I would feel like I had been hit by a Mack truck, for a good long while afterwards. Pushing my robust baby out of me, ended up spraining my tail bone and I had to sit on a rubber doughnut for weeks. Of course, my son is worth it. I’m not complaining. He is one of the greatest joys and loves of my life. Still, when I saw the quote mentioned above, this is one of the many instances, in my life, that came to my mind, to validate it. Before my first son was born, I read a million books on childbirth, listened to a litany of frightening childbirth stories, (which any woman who has ever given birth to a baby herself, and notices a young, pregnant woman, feels a compulsion to share every gory detail), and of course, I took the requisite neighborhood Lamaze classes. Everyone focused on giving birth to the baby. All of the advice was geared towards the birth episode, which typically lasts less than one day. Not once, not ever, did I feel warned about how physically terrible I would feel after the birth, and I didn’t even have a cesarean delivery.

We’ve been wounded here with the coronavirus, folks, in a big way. The initial gash of realizing that people were dying at an alarming rate from a disease for which we have no cure for, nor protection from, and then having to quarantine for weeks on end, and all of this happening, in a time span that felt nothing short of sudden, was shocking, alarming and intense, to say the least. The initial wound of realization was overwhelming and numbing. The initial injury hit us like a sledgehammer. It still seems utterly surreal. Still, we are going to heal from this coronavirus situation. We know this. We have already started to slowly open things up, to air the wound out, and we are trying to scab over this horrible situation, a little bit, in any way that we can. We have the smartest people in the world, working 24/7 to find solutions to cure the coronavirus and all of the damaging side effects and complications, that has come with it. We are all in a state of mourning for our losses, with some of us having paid the worst price of all, but still, we shall heal. It’s just that the healing is not going to be quick and easy and painless. No real healing ever is, from any kind of major trauma. The healing from any wound or trauma, is often the hardest part.

Today, I read on the internet, a quote that said, “Enjoy the space between where you are and where you are going.” Life is mostly made of those in-between spaces. And I don’t think that we were meant to waste the in-between spaces, by wishing them away. The vast amount of healing and growth and life, happens in those in-between spaces. We just don’t notice what happens in the in-between spaces, as much, because they are not nearly as jarring and life-stopping, as the unforeseen traumas and dramas, that stop us in our tracks. The in-between spaces are lulling and less interesting than the joyous, raucous conclusions and celebrations. But what do we celebrate on graduations? We celebrate the hard work of years and years of wisdom gathering and knowledge building and a child evolving into an adult. We celebrate the in-between space, starting with the first day of kindergarten, to the last day of high school, for a senior. There’s a lot of life that happened in that in-between space. And also, a lot of experience and growth that occurred in that span of many, many years, in-between. Every birthday is really a celebration of the in-between space between birthdays. Birthdays celebrate the life that happened in the in-between space, in the time period of one year. The in-between spaces are so very important. We need to be patient and grateful for the spaces. Right now we are in an in-between space that started with a horrible virus infiltrating the world and it will end with a calming, healing conclusion. We know this. Right now our job is to live as healthfully and peacefully and patiently as we can, in this in-between space. Little do we realize, that we are currently growing, exponentially, as individuals, as families, as communities, as nations, as the world, so that when we finally get to the healing conclusion, we will have globally transformed into a wiser, stronger, more compassionate, more clear version of what we were before. That’s what healing does. Healing is not easy. But a true healing, while inevitably leaving a scar, brings about such an authentic transformation in us, that sometimes we find ourselves perhaps even a tad grateful for the initial, sharp, deep pain, that brought us around to the in-between space, which helped us to heal into our most whole, our most authentic, our most enlightened versions of ourselves .

Amma

I read on Twitter that the great Indian actor, Irrfan Khan passed away this morning after a long battle with cancer, at the age of 53. He primarily acted in Indian movies and was a Bollywood superstar, but we Americans would recognize his handsome face in movies such as Slumdog Millionaire, Life of Pi and Jurassic World. He left behind his wife and two sons, and millions of adoring fans. Apparently, in his final minutes of life he mentioned to his wife that “Amma” had come to help him to transistion. Apparently his last words were, “Amma has come to take me.” Khan was referring to his own mother.

I remember hearing the name “Amma” before, so I did some research. Here is some of the meanings that I found for the word “Amma”.

Amma means “born on Saturday” (African), “mother” (Basque), “water” (Native American) and “maid” (Arabic). (charlies-names.com)

Amma” means “Mother” in many south Indian languages including Malayalam, Tamil, Telugu, Kannada, and also in other languages and their dialects spoken in central and northern parts of India. It means the same in some other non-Indian languages also, such as Sinhalese. (Quora)

An Amma is someone who would literally do anything for her children and grandchildren. She is someone who cannot ever be replaced,no matter what. She is someone that never gives up and fights until she wins, and she always wins. She is the strongest person that you will ever meet and if you are sick and afraid, being with her makes all your fears disappear. She is someone that God took extra time on and made to be the most amazing person on this earth. But most of all she is someone that no matter what will love you unconditionally forever. She is a superhero, our superhero. (Urban Dictionary)

Amma is also the living “hugging guru”. This cheerful, warm, guru goes around the world giving hugs to people sometimes 17 hours straight, without so much as taking a bathroom break. She has given more than 33 million hugs to date, all around the world.

Friends, if ever there was a time we needed our Amma, it is now. Find your Amma. Whether your Amma is your own mother, or your grandmother, or your auntie, or your sister, cousin, or a special teacher or a friend, or a mix of every strong, compassionate female essence, who has every touched your life, find her presence. Perhaps your Amma is Mother Earth. Perhaps she is a spirit guide that lives inside of you. Perhaps Amma is an ancient tree, who stands tall through many storms. Perhaps she is a gallant female pet who protects you fiercely and loyally. Perhaps your Amma is You. Perhaps Amma is a mix of all of these wonderful women who have comforted you and inspired you and who have loved you fiercely and unconditionally. Find your Amma in your heart, and feel her holding you tight. Feel Amma guiding you through this very difficult time in the world. Feel your Amma’s reassurance, and her soft comforting, and her soothing lulls, and her utter kindness. Allow your Amma to keep your wrapped up in a hug for the entire day and let her guide you tenderly. Feel the relief of just resting safely in your Amma’s arms and in her heart. And know that everything will be okay.

Things That Caught My Attention

“I have come to think of almost everyone with whom I come into contact as a patient in the emergency room. I see a lot of gaping wounds and dazed expressions.” ~@ANNELAMOTT

This first quote struck me as quite true and interesting. Yesterday, seemed like a particularly rough day for a lot of people in my circle. The emergency room of Life had a full waiting room, yesterday, it seemed. I hate that I feel so confused with anyone I encounter on a walk or in the grocery store. It’s a feeling filled with compassion and wanting to hug them and show them smiley eyes behind my mask and at yet the same time, I try to avert eye contact and I hold my breath and kind of shrink into myself, any time I pass someone. Then I see the people walking around confidently without masks, and I am filled with a mix of righteous anger, a twinge of embarrassment (I’m not used to the mask thing yet) and maybe even a smidge of jealousy of their indignant confidence. Confliction of feelings is a diagnosis that I would give to myself and probably to most people whom I know.

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The above picture is what someone did to convert their attic into an in-home tent. I want one. My daughter is convinced that we have “attic people” living upstairs, despite the fact that we live in Florida and our attic is so hot and inhospitable that we sweat gallons, just bringing our Christmas decorations down every year. And that’s in the wintertime. If we do have attic people, I hope that they have decorated it like the picture above. I think that it would add to our overall home’s value, for sure. It would be like having a vacation home, in your home.

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Today would have been Harper Lee’s 94th birthday. What a visionary, amazing writer! When you stand out from the “stand outs”, that really says something.

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Someone commented on this tweet by saying that the aliens would get food poisoning. I texted this meme to some friends and one of my friends said that there is great truth in this, as she has eaten ice cream every single night of quarantine. I mentioned that I eat ice cream every single night, too, and that’s pretty desperate of me because I have lactose intolerance. So, if the aliens eat me, I think I will be like a cheese puff to them, filled with a lot of air.

Speaking of being an old airbag, I better quit while I’m ahead. See you tomorrow, friends! Hope that you are not in the proverbial emergency room waiting area, but at the very least, resting comfortably at home.

The Fish Bowl

I’ve been trying to decide what I miss more. Do I miss not being able to do specific things or is it more that I miss the feeling of freedom to do whatever I feel like doing? Out of my immediate family, I honestly think that my daily life has changed the least. In my family, it is more like everyone has become an integral part of my daily life and routine, that’s all. It is like I am living in a fish bowl that now has a heck of a lot more fish swimming around in it, than usual.

Welcome to the Fish Bowl Enter with Caution | Make a Meme

That’s all I have for a Monday. Mondays are tough in a normal world. In quarantine world, they are extra sluggish. See you tomorrow. Stay well.

Soul Sunday

“I should like, if I could, to leave a humble gift – a bit of chaste prose that had caught up some noble moods.” – Max Ehrmann

So yesterday I was going through some old books of mine and I found a lovely poem by the heralded author and poet, Max Ehrmann. This is an old poem. Ehrmann wrote it in 1927 and its worldwide popularity started around the 1950s, years after Ehrmann’s death. The poem is called Desiderata which is Latin for “things that are yearned for.” As my regular readers know, Sundays are devoted to poetry here at Adulting – Second Half. Typically, I write a poem, or I find a poem by someone else that I want to share. I ask that you share your poetry in the Comments section. This is not a critique session. This is a safe outpouring of our feelings in the form of words. Please share. Your poems are precious gifts to yourself and to us. Today, my offering is just to share Desiderata by Max Ehrmann because the poem holds particular poignancy in times like these, especially.

Desiderata | Desiderata poem, Desiderata, Words