“We don’t talk about trees getting older, we say that they are growing. Let’s use the same language for ourselves. We are not getting older, we are growing.” – @Eternal.Knowledge
When she was a little girl, our daughter received the gift of a tiny little fir sprig in a cute little pot shaped like a Santa toy bag. When Christmas was over that year, she couldn’t bear to part with the little fir tree, so we replanted it in various pots over the years. Our daughter turns nineteen in a few weeks, and her little baby fir tree is that tree that you see on the right, in the picture above. We keep it on our front stoop, but it is starting to get so big that it is covering our windows. I told my husband that not too long from now, it may have to become our Christmas tree one year.
I saw the quote shown above the picture the other day, and I had to ponder it for a while. Physical growth is so obvious when things are young and turning into adult whatevers. Children are growing, plants are growing, puppies are growing . . . The truth is, we rarely talk about “growing” in more than a physical sense, in our regular everyday language. The focus on growth is physical growth most of the time, because like my daughter’s fir sprig, the growth is so obvious to the naked eye.
Emotional and spiritual growth is deeper and less noticeable. And where I think the above quote got it wrong, is that some people do stop growing as they age. They stunt their emotional growth, and despite aging, they really aren’t growing, but more so, they remain diminished in their closed mindedness, and they start to decay and to decline.
As trees grow older and mature, their yearly growth is less noticeable. You only realize their subtle growth by noticing new branches with young vital green leaves springing off of them. The goal for any of us, is to always be growing in new directions with our branches, right? The goal is to remain rooted in our deepest values, but to reach out into areas which we’ve never been before, and to continue to grow, and to learn, and to stretch our horizons.
We can choose to grow with our unavoidable aging process, or we can let ourselves wither and remain stunted and small and fade as we age. Aging is not within our control. Everything that lives right now is currently aging. Growing is a choice. Growing is what makes our own experience of living and aging, meaningful and interesting and full of wonder and purpose. Trees, even in the worst soil and the harshest of conditions, do their damndest to grow and to reach for the skies. Most trees live longer than we humans do. (especially the trees that live in harsh conditions -“their ability to survive these harsh environments and adverse growing conditions is exactly their secret to great longevity.” -nps.gov). The oldest trees are the Bristlecone Pines, and they are close to 5000 years old. Because the trees continue to grow, even in harsh and adverse environments, they continue to live to ripe old ages. Is there a correlation to their continuing to grow that allows trees to live long, solid, stable lives? I think that this is the real question to ponder.
No matter what our age is right now, we have a daily choice. We can choose to become decrepit and stagnant and worn out and despondent and resentful and stuck, as we continue to age, or we can continue to grow and to reach and to learn and to continually sprout new branches of ourselves, as we age. If we choose to age the latter way, us and everyone around us, will not so much focus on our inevitable, obvious physical aging, but will instead, be in awe of our ever-evolving masterful, majestic, inspiring growth.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.