Ice SCREAM

I’m delayed writing this post because my daughter was telling me all about her experience last night – her first night at her new summer job at a local beach ice cream shop. It’s a busy place. Time will fly. My daughter said that what she’s most amazed about is how much work there is behind the scenes in one of these little specialty shops. Most of her work will be in the preparation, the cleaning and the stocking. Serving customers an ice cream cone is actually a small part of it all.

This reminded me of a parable I recently read. A speaker asked a group of people how much time it takes to get a cheeseburger at McDonalds. Most people answered that it takes between 3-5 minutes. The speaker reminded everyone that someone had to grow the wheat and then bake the buns, grow and cut the onions, make the ketchup from tomatoes, butcher the beef, and then form the patties. Then a truck driver had to get all of the ingredients to the local McDonalds, where workers had to put the items into the freezers and refrigerators, then cook the burgers and wrap them up, etc. etc. The point is, nothing in this world is as easy as the finished product makes it appear to us. A photograph of one happy moment in a family’s life is not even close to the entire story of events, and experiences, and ups and downs, and sacrifices, and worries and joys that make up any family. Everything in life takes longer and more effort, and more hands and hearts, all the way around, in order to create it, than we want to believe that it does. Finished products can be so deceiving. Don’t expect ease, and quick fixes for anything that is worthwhile to have in your life. Even fast food hamburgers and ice cream cones take many hands, and a lot of time and energy, in order to get you to the finished product.

When you are frustrated about something that you want to create and manifest in your own life and it is taking a lot of time and effort with no end in sight, whether it be with a job, or a relationship, or an accomplishment, remind yourself that most things don’t come easy. Ultimately though, the effort, and the discipline, the time and energy and focus, and the blood sweat and tears, is usually the part of what makes any completed end product so especially satisfying to savor and to enjoy. (Do you want whipped cream and a cherry on top? Let me go milk a cow and pick some cherries.)

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

The End of the Race

My amazing daughter turns eighteen today. This is a huge milestone for her, and it’s a big milestone for her father and I, as well. Today, all four of our children are legally adults. We have raised our big brood to adulthood.

Every single friend of mine, who is also a mother, has claimed not to fear death for herself, but more so, she fears the idea of not being there to raise her children. I have always shared that same sentiment. When we wrote our will, we had certain guardians in mind and we always knew that our kids would be there for each other, but selfishly, I wanted to raise my children. I wanted to be their biggest female influence, and I wanted their father to be their main male role model. I didn’t want to miss a thing.

So today, I thank God, with everything that I have, that I was able to complete this sometimes overwhelming task of bringing up four babies to their burgeoning adulthoods, along with the man whom I love. I thank God for this incredible experience of co-creating the entity which I most cherish in this world, our family. I certainly hope to have many more years to share in the expansion of our family as my adult children carry on their own journeys outward, into their own growing adventures, but today I am savoring the close of the childhood years. Today, before I get revved up for the new race soon to start (my empty nest phase), I am crossing the finish line, in glory. I am savoring the successful end of an incredible adventure – a race/adventure/run that I didn’t always feel prepared for, didn’t always run the strides I would have liked to, had a few stumbles along the way, but I always knew that the wind was at our back, giving us the stamina to keep on going. There were higher forces always helping us along the way. This I knew, and so I was always able to keep my breath and I was able to keep a steady pace forward, full on with my pack. Deep love has an energy that keeps you going, like no other force in this world can do. Today I am reveling in that love for a beautiful young woman whom I have always called the perfect exclamation point to our family. Today, I am savoring the overwhelming mix of feelings (pride/relief/happiness/wonder/excitement/melancholy/nostalgia/satisfaction) of finishing the longest, most fulfilling race of my life. Today I am grateful for finishing strong.

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Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.