Live Love

Today, my great aunt’s body is being put in its resting place. Her beautiful spirit is already free in Heaven with my grandmother, her other siblings and all those people she loved, who have already passed on. My Aunt Mary Lou passed on Christmas day. She fought cancer for 28 years. She held on as long as she could to be with those she treasured most – her beloved husband, children and grandchildren. They knew how much she loved them, because she never held back in that regard.

My Aunt Mary Lou was my grandmother’s youngest sibling and the last of the five of them, to leave Earth, and to go to Heaven. I was the flower girl in her wedding. Unfortunately, as these things happen with extended families, lives get busy, and our relationship dwindled to seeing each other on the occasional wedding or funeral and exchanging Christmas cards. Still, I never doubted her strong love for me and my family, ever. I had heard in early December that hospice had been called. I went to a little chapel where I like to pray, on Hope St. (that’s a real place) There, I lit a candle for her. I texted her some pictures. She texted me back that she loved me and my family so much. I have a lovely little ornament on our Christmas tree from her. She sent it to me when I was pregnant with my first son. It is a wooden heart and on it, she hand wrote (she had lovely, distinctive handwriting), “Baby – we love you already.”

Aunt Mary Lou wasn’t very rich or very famous, or very educated, but she knew what counts. She knew what was really important and she lived it. She lived love. It’s that simple. Rest in peace, dear one. Thank you for touching my life.

A True Love Story

When I first decided to start my blog, I thought that I mainly should keep it to being about my own thoughts about this transitional middle stage time in my life.  I feel that my family’s and friends’ privacy is important, and I try only to mention them anecdotally, as it relates to my own experiences.  So, on my 24th wedding anniversary, which is today, how do I protect the privacy of the most important, meaningful relationship in my life and yet still express everything that this day means to me and more importantly, everything that my husband means to me?  There aren’t really words that can fully convey the blessing that it is, to be married to my best friend, my soulmate, my lover, my life partner, “my person.”

When Gwyneth Paltrow asked her father how he and her mother had such a long, successful marriage, he said that they never wanted to be divorced at the same time.  I remember years ago, being at a wedding and watching this elderly couple dancing with each other, gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes.  I was so enchanted, I sauntered up to them and asked them what the secret was, to their long, happy marriage.  They said, “Oh, we’re not married, honey.  We just started dating.”

People are always wanting to know the secret formula for everlasting love.  My husband and I were out celebrating our anniversary at a lovely restaurant this past Saturday.  The man who brought us our bread wished us “Happy Anniversary” and asked how many years we have been married.  When we said we have been married for 24 years, he looked utterly amazed.  He said, “Twenty-four years, Wow!  I can’t string together 24 months in a relationship.”

I wish I could explain “the secret formula” to having a long, successful, happy marriage.  Just like all the centenarians who give conflicting advice on the secret of having a long life, I’m not really sure that there is just one answer, or just one way.  I just feel incredibly blessed and lucky and thankful that the formula my husband and I have created, works for us.  I’m totally in love with my husband.  I love the life we have created together and I’m so grateful for the many life adventures we have shared.  I cherish our family.

When we were in a lovely hotel one time, my husband took a picture of a saying, hanging up on the wall and he texted it to me.  It said, “A True Love Story Never Ends”.  I hope that our love story never ends, because our love is the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me in my life. Our love has brought forth everything that I hold dear in my life.  Happy Anniversary, my love.  Thank you for everything!