Tag: inspiration

Thumbs Up

I’ve had a numb thumb on my left hand since March of this year. The numb thumb is the last symptom to stubbornly remain after a miserable, agonizingly painful experience which was diagnosed as “cervical radiopathy” or commonly known as a pinched nerve in my neck (to this day, I honestly can’t think of any one particular event that caused the original painful experience. I just woke up with it one day, and it was truly awful for about a week). I’ve doctored for my thumb – with my general practioner, a neurologist, two different chiropractors, two different acupuncturists and I’ve had an MRI. (It turns out that I have bulging discs in my neck, but apparently so do a vast majority of us who are in our fifties and beyond. These bulging discs often do not cause symptoms and discomfort.) I’ve bought all sorts of contraptions and pillows and I’ve taken muscle relaxers and I’ve faithfully done a gazillion physical therapy exercises on a daily basis. I’m not ready to consider surgery. My thumb is not painful. It’s annoying, at most.

Interestingly, I get a massage with a wonderful massage therapist about once a month. One of my best friends recommended her to me, and so I knew right then that this massage therapist would be extra special. And she is. My massage therapist is perfectly fit for her occupation. She is kind, intuitive and absolutely dedicated to her clients. She is even a little bit “geeky” about her profession, and she loves when I ask questions. She is dogged to find answers. Rarely do I leave her office, without us pouring over her phone about something concerning muscles or nerves or the best balance of modalities to use in order to heal. I love my massage therapist. I love her earnestness and curiosity and passion. These traits are so contagious and enlivening and inspiring to me.

The last time I got a massage was a few weeks ago, and I told my massage therapist that my latest chiropractor said not to touch my neck and I reminded my massage therapist about the bulging discs in my neck as seen in my MRI. She looked at me and she firmly stated: “Kelly, I’ve been thinking about this situation and I don’t really think your neck is where the nerve is being blocked.” She then brought her anatomy chart over for me to look at and she told me that she believes that my nerve is trapped by my scapula in my shoulder. (I did notice that she always seems to spend a lot more time on my left shoulder than anywhere else when I have a massage.) “You know, a lot of people have bulging discs and have no symptoms. It’s just a hunch, but I really think that your focus needs to be on your shoulder.”

And so I left her office that day and I did some research. I found this on the internet:

“Dorsal scapular nerve (DSN) entrapment syndrome is an under-recognized cause of neck and shoulder pain. DSN injuries can be the origin of a well-defined chronic pain syndrome, often referred to as DSN syndrome. DSN syndrome is often characterized by a dull ache along the medial border of the scapula.”

And since then I have been faithfully doing unique exercises designed to address this issue and I have gotten more sensation in my thumb then with any of the other treatments I have tried all year long. I actually have real hope related to healing this numbness in my thumb, for the first time in a long time.

I don’t want to become one of those older folks who bores everyone to death about her various ailments. I write this as a reminder that when it comes to our health, we really are all unique. We have to be our own advocates, and not blind sheep when it comes to taking advice for the health of our bodies. We have to be open-minded, hopeful, dedicated and true to ourselves. If you look at the “medical food chain” of the practitioners listed above, the person who has helped to guide me, and to heal my thumb the most is the massage therapist, perhaps thought by some to be the “low man” on that particular totem pole. Interestingly, my massage therapist is the one who has shown the most dedication, time and interest in helping me with my situation. And I don’t say this to disparage the others. I think that they all wanted to help me, but medical practitioners face a lot of constraints and limits these days, that are out of their own hands. In the end, I am dedicated to helping myself, and to healing myself, and I am grateful for anyone who has helped me along the way.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Unplugged

Credit: Gregorio Catarino, X

The picture above kind of sums it all up, doesn’t it? My husband, two of our sons and our daughter all had plans to go to the gym this morning. (I didn’t. The gym is not my thing.) Needless to say, those plans never came into fruition. The day after any big event/holiday/vacation is such a hodgepodge of emotion and sensation, isn’t it? Satisfaction. Relief. Exhaustion. Disbelief. It takes a while to process everything that goes into “the biggies” once they are completed, right? We are made up of our minds and bodies and spirits, but sometimes these three aspects need to get synched up, in order to move forward. Our minds are already going to: “Time to clean up and let’s move on to the next thing. Get your calendars out.” Our spirits are going: “Wow. A lot just happened over these last few weeks. How am I feeling about everything that went on? I didn’t realize that I could feel this many things all at once. I need a good laugh/cry/bath/sigh/hug from my better half/last piece of pie, before I can move on.” Our bodies are going: “Ugh. Help me. System overload. Can we please get back to normal before I explode?!”

Try not to jump right back into the saddle until all three of your aspects of yourself are ready to move ahead into the new year. If we all made “overall health” a desire for 2024 what would that look like? What does your mind need to stimulate itself more healthfully in the new year? Our minds are like German Shepherds. They need to work constantly and if they are not given a task, they will make a mission for themselves. Have you let your mind run amok like an untrained German Shepherd? Get a leash and be the leader of your mind this year. What about your body? What could be tweaked (or even overhauled) for a healthier new year for the daily vehicle which allows you to experience life? And spirit . . . Sweet spirit. Has your spirit been neglected? Is it a tangled ball mess of emotion that could stand some dedicated quiet and safe detangling time, perhaps at the end of each day with some meditation or prayer or with a good listener?

Sometimes when we are utterly depleted, these are the times that make us most open and receptive to what needs to be tweaked and even changed in our lives. These times of overload, force us to stop and to reboot. Are the programs that we are running “in all three facets of the game” the same ones that we want to utilize in 2024? What’s ready to be shut down? What’s ready to grow? It’s not lost on me that we end every year with the bang of “The Holidays.” It’s overwhelm by design. It forces us to collapse and to refocus, just in time for a precious, fresh new year in our lives.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Merry Monday-Funday

I just wanted to take a break from our family’s Christmas morning festivities, to wish you all a very merry Christmas!! I hope that you are enjoying the best that today has to offer. Thank you for coming by the blog this year. It means the world. This blog is one of the best presents which I have ever given to myself. Thank you for being a true gift in my life. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

“Christmas, my child, is love in action. Every time we love, every time we give, it’s Christmas.” – Dale Evans

“I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning.” – Dan Aykroyd

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Good Ol’ Days

Merry Christmas Eve! Anticipation is a word that comes to mind on Christmas Eve, doesn’t it? Anticipation is a word full of hope, with a little impatience and exhaustion of waiting. Anticipating goes a little beyond hope. When you anticipate something happening, you firmly believe that this something will definitely happen, and also that it will happen in the near future.

The commercial above was legendary when I was a kid, especially being a kid from Pittsburgh, the home of Heinz ketchup. The idea from the commercial is that anything that takes a while to come to fruition, is worth the wait.

These days we start anticipating the holiday season right after Halloween. Christmas decorations are all over our towns and our stores for the last sixth of the year. We buy presents, we decorate our homes, we order cards and then we write them out and send them (for those of you on my Christmas card list, we are anticipating New Years Day cards this year – oops!), we wrap the presents, we prepare religious services and celebrations, and we get gobs of food in our freezers, well in advance to these last days of any year that culminate into “The Holidays.” And now they are here. The anticipation is over and the time to savor has come.

Here are the lyrics of Carly Simon’s song “Anticipation” that was featured in the Heinz ketchup commercial:

We can never know about the days to come
But we think about them anyway
And I wonder if I’m really with you now
Or just chasin’ after some finer day

Anticipation, anticipation
Is makin’ me late
Is keepin’ me waitin’

And I tell you how easy it feels to be with you
And how right your arms feel around me
But I, I rehearsed those words just late last night
When I was thinkin’ about how right tonight might be

Anticipation, anticipation
Is makin’ me late
Is keepin’ me waitin’

And tomorrow we might not be together
I’m no prophet and I don’t know nature’s ways
So I’ll try and see into your eyes right now
And stay right here ’cause these are the good old days

And stay right here ’cause these are the good old days
(These are the good old days)
(These are the good old days)
(These are the good old days)
(These are the good old days)

“And stay right here ’cause these are the good old days.” We are here now. No more Christmas to-do lists. No more Christmas bustle. No more travelling a desert, following a large star. The time is here to be still. The time is here to just notice and to be aware of our feelings, to notice the deep love we feel for those surrounding us, and also for those who aren’t with us, but who are always nestled inside of our hearts. The time is here to appreciate all of the miracles that are part living any one life. Be here now. These are the good old days.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Allies and Advocates

I recently read an article by an author who has written several books. She says that when a person asks her, “How do you write a book?”, she says that the best way to do it, is to tell people that you are writing a book. It keeps you accountable, especially if you tell your intentions to people whom you deeply respect, and you feel that they are supportive of your biggest dreams and aspirations. You certainly don’t have to tell everybody and their grandmother about things. You don’t have to announce your goals on social media (unfortunately there are people who might secretly want to sabotage your dreams and goals), but from the people “in your corner”, find accountability partners for all of your visions, ambitions, goals and intentions.

Today is the winter solstice. It is almost the end of 2023. There is no better time to really start honing in on what you want for 2024. What is it that you would really like to see and experience in your life, in the upcoming future? What do you have in your life right now (relationships, experiences, routines, places, things, etc.) that are truly meaningful for you? How do you continue to nurture these aspects of your life, so that they continue to stay healthy, and help you to stay on track for peace and happiness in 2024? What has reached its expiration date in your life? (relationships, experiences, habits, places, traditions, etc.) How do you remove these things from your life in order to clear your path towards “better”? Once you get really clear on what you really want in your life going forward, and you have considered some practical steps that you need to take, in order to get there, find accountability partners to keep you on track. Find someone whom you trust, who will earnestly and regularly ask you about your progress on your goals. Find someone who is rooting for you, and who will keep you honest. And if you believe that your greatest motivation is found from proving your “haters” wrong, make sure that those bums are the first people to see your list of goals for the new year.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Sherpa

How’s everyone doing this holiday season? Are you taking breaks and taking your own “temperature” every once in a while? I always find it a little surprising that when every year that we bring them out of the attic, our traditional Christmas decorations often look a little worse for wear. Despite the fact that the decorations are only placed out, in “safe spots”, for a few weeks out of the year, and then get carefully wrapped and put away safely in boxes for most of the year, they still get aged and frayed and faded and sometimes even broken. It turns out that the holidays can be wonderful and exhilarating, but they can also be a little hard on things. If the holidays deteriorate objects whose only job is to sit and to look pretty for three weeks out of the year, what might the holidays be doing to us?? Here’s a holiday hug from me to you! It’s okay if you are getting a little frayed, if your energy is blinking off and on, like Christmas lights with a short, and if at times, you are questioning if you might even be a little broken. Be gentle with yourself. You are more precious than your most favorite heirloom decoration. Treat yourself as such.

Kelly Corrigan recently quoted George Saunders who says that when you do good work, no one is going to ask you to stop. He says, “The mountain keeps growing as you climb it.” Be a good Sherpa guide to yourself this holiday season. Sherpas know that in order to keep climbing mountains, you have to take breaks. Sherpas know that in order to survive the mountain climb, you must have good boundaries as to how much you can do in any one day. Sherpas know that even if you are climbing the mountain as a group, the climb is really an individual pursuit for each climber, and every climb is unique, even if the same climb is achieved, year after year. The Sherpas most important duty is the safety and the rescue of any of their climbers in trouble. Be a good Sherpa to yourself this season of climbing Mt. Holidays. If we are honest with ourselves, there is only really one true summit in the end, and we all are going to reach it. The journey is far more important than any summit.

“The higher you climb, the more you realize how small you are in this vast universe.” – Tenzing Norgay, renowned Sherpa mountaineer

“The real hero of the Himalayas are not the mountaineers but the Sherpas!”
― Mehmet Murat ildan

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Soul Sunday

Good morning. I have spent a lot of time this morning, trying to best decipher what the well-known saying, “the rest is poetry” means. It is one of those sayings that I have said a lot in my life, but never really thought about it when I was using it as a form of dramatic flair in my speech.

“Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry and imagination.” – Max Planck

This is what Chat GPT had to say about it:

“The rest is poetry” is a phrase that is often used metaphorically to suggest that the subsequent information or details are beautifully expressive, imaginative, or emotionally charged, much like poetry. In a literal sense, poetry is a form of literary expression that often uses heightened language and symbolism to convey emotions, ideas, or experiences.

When someone says, “the rest is poetry,” they may be implying that what follows is not just a straightforward or factual account but is infused with deeper meaning, creativity, or a certain level of artistry. It can be a way of signaling that the details or information that come next are to be appreciated for their aesthetic or emotive qualities rather than just their literal content.“

This begs the question, how much about our lives is really factual, concrete content, and how much of it is just pure poetry? Might I suggest remembering the old telephone game, where you whisper a short story, to be passed down through a line of people, each whispering the story to the next person. Rarely does the story told at the beginning of the line, sound anything like the version of the last person who shares it. My poem, written by me/for me, today, can be read below. If you don’t write a poem of your own today, at least enthusiastically live the poetry of your life. It’s epic, your life. It really is epic. The rest of your life is poetry . . . .

“Right in the Middle”

Focus on the center, she said.

Why the center?

The Center is the calm in the storm.

It is the place that everything else orbits around.

It is the heart, the hub, the place.

The Capital City of law and order.

Everything revolves around the center.

Where do I find The Center?

Go deep, deep, deep within.

You’ll find the Center there, contentedly,

steadily, beating the drum of your soul,

breathing life into your dreams,

and expanding your orbit outwards,

into the Universe of your own one Life.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Bombastic Birthday

Happy Birthday to me! I read this quote the other day:

I am 53 years old today. I am level 53. I have passed the 53 mile marker and I am zooming into my 54th year. I think the quote above is true to a point. Life can be truly humbling. I sometimes wish that I had some of that naive audacious panache that I had when I was younger – that young woman who marched right in, and worried about the details later, before many times being humbled by having my ass handed to me on a platter. But honestly, I don’t believe in living life with regrets. Throughout my lifetime, I have wasted time, I have wasted energy, I have wasted my breath on many, many things that do not matter. But I have lived enthusiastically and hopefully. I have loved deeply and fully. And truthfully, I’m still pretty damn loud.

I am a big believer in the onion/rose principle, that says that you can use each day of your life to unfold, until one day you end up at the deepest core of your true essence. If you shame yourself with regrets, you stop unfolding. You stay as a tightly wound, stony ball or a rigid, stubborn bud, holding desperately to layers that are fervently asking to be let go.

When I read the quote above, I thought to myself, this is why many people are afraid of self awareness. This is why so many people are unlikely to explore their own patterns and beliefs, and how these things affect their lives. Many people’s deepest fear is shame and recrimination. They fear the realization and disappointment that they haven’t been true to themselves for a long, long time. But this is a waste! What if all my life I was walking around with blinders at a banquet? The only thing I could see was the bland mush in my plate in front of me, because the blinders blocked everything else. Let’s say for 53 years, I wore the blinders until I started getting the sneaking suspicion that I could remove my own blinders. If I am brave enough to remove my blinders, I realize that there is an enormous banquet of delicious variety and beauty for me to explore and to experience beyond the bland mush. Now at this moment, do I sit and wail about the 53 years in which I thought that I could only have mush? Do I hate myself for keeping my blinders on for as long as I did? Or do I dive right in and excitedly explore the delights of the banquet that I have opened myself up to for my own exploration and exhilaration?? Some people are so afraid of realizing what they may have missed out on, that they stubbornly hold tight to their blinders and settle for the same old mush.

People are living longer than ever. At the risk of sounding crass, more than a few notable famous figures have passed lately who I was shocked to find out that they were still alive. Many people are living healthy, purposeful lives well into their nineties, and even past a century. It is never too late to take off the blinders. It is never too late to keep unpeeling the layers. What if you have only got one day, or maybe even one more minute to experience “the banquet”? Is that not better than never, ever experiencing it at all??

So, this I say: the older you get, you can get more loud if you want. Life is humbling, so be humbled, but use it as a wake up call to unabashedly Live and Love, Loud and Proud. Take your blinders off and don’t waste your precious time on any more nonsense.

I love you. Thank you for being here with me. It has made my birthday even more special. <3

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Glass Down

I’m not a big believer in the categories “good” or “bad” or “normal.” I think that there are very few things that 100 percent fall into any of these categories and a lot of that is relative to different perspectives. I believe that it is best to discern things and people and places by “Is exposure to this person/place/thing, healthy for me?” and also, “How much exposure to this people/place/thing is healthy for me?” The answers to these questions are only for me to decide. These questions also apply to social media. Social media is not in its essence, “good” or “evil.” It can be used for both. The question for any of us is, “Is how I am utilizing social media on a daily basis, healthy for me?” A good way to judge your health (mental, physical, spiritual) is to examine how you feel. Generally things that are all-of-the-way-around healthy for you will make you feel “alive”, energized, hopeful, grounded, peaceful, pain-free, rested, calm, creative, connected, even-keeled etc. So when I am starting the new year, and when I am considering the tweaks that I want to make in my life in this new year, I examine what is making me feel overall healthy, and also what is detracting from my overall health, and then I make adjustments accordingly.

The social media platform which I spend most of my time engaging on is X (formerly Twitter). This is because I’m an insatiably curious person. I like to learn more about things that I am interested in. One of my favorite accounts to follow is Vala Afshar, who is a business leader, scientist, and author. There is nothing controversial on his thread. Usually he posts videos of amazing robotic inventions, or fabulous works and marvels from the fields of engineering and architecture, or famous, inspiring speeches from business leaders like Warren Buffett, or sometimes he posts beautiful facts about nature (for instance, today he posted a video of a gorgeous, golden 1400 year-old gingko tree in China and he said that gingko trees existed in the days of the dinosaurs!) In short, following Vala Afshar’s X account is a reminder of just how incredibly amazing our natural world is, and just how ingenious humanity can be, when we put our minds to it.

Recently, Vala Afshar posted two different videos of the same professor teaching interesting, inspiring lessons to his students. Unfortunately, I can’t discern who this professor is, or what he teaches, or where he teaches (or taught), but the professor appears to be an American, he is charismatic and he puts me in mind of Dean Martin. In the first lesson, the professor offers up a $20 bill and asks the class who wants it. Of course, everyone raises their hands. He then puts the bill on the ground and stamps on it, and then he picks the $20 bill up and asks his students who wants it now. Not surprisingly, everyone still raises their hands. He then crinkles it into a ball and rubs it between his hands. When he offers it up, everyone still volunteers to take it. The professor says that this is a lesson in value. The $20 bill had the same value, despite everything it had gone through and what had worn it thin. He said to use this lesson to never forget your own intrinsic value, no matter what happens throughout your lifetime.

In the second video, the professor picks up a glass of water and asks his students to guess its absolute weight. They throw out their guesses: Eight ounces? Twelve ounces? The professor quiets his students down. He said that it really doesn’t matter how much the glass of water weighs. The professor says that what really matters is how long he holds on to it, up in the air. If he holds on to it for a few minutes , the glass of water is easy to hold, and not that heavy. However, the longer he holds on to the glass of water, the heavier it feels. The professor compares our stresses and worries in our lives, to the glass of water. If you spend a few minutes on them, you’ll be fine, but the longer you hold on to them, the more you’ll start to ache, and if you spend all of your day on your problems, the professor says that you feel “paralyzed and incapable of doing anything.” The professor ends his lesson by telling his students that when they start to worry: “Always remember to put the glass down.”

Both of these lessons are wonderful reminders and excellent visuals to put into our “tool box” for better, overall and invigorating health in 2024. I hope that you are enjoying the holiday season for its own everlasting intrinsic worth (no matter what it looks like on the outside), and when you are getting frazzled, you’re able to “Put that glass down!” Cheers! Now, put the glass down.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Monday – Funday

Good morning. One of the favorite parts of this time of year for me, has nothing really to do with twinkly lights, and sweets, and celebrations (although all of these things are great), but more so, it is a time of deep reflection for me. It’s the end of a year. My birthday falls in this month. Last night I spent some time going over my journals of the last two years. This really helps me to pinpoint things that I want to keep investing in, and also, circumstances and habits that I want to change in the new year. It helps me to get clear on my goals and my visions for the new year. This time of year is the perfect time for reflection, gratitude, and renewal. I hope that you can find some quiet space in your calendar this month, to do the same. The winter solstice is on the 21st, which in the northern hemisphere is the darkest day of the year, but after that day, the light just keeps increasing and increasing and increasing throughout the beginning of the year. The winter solstice might just be the perfect day to decide where you want to pour your light and energy on this year, and what you are ready to lay to rest in the shadows of what is now in the past.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.