Trunks Up Friday

Female elephants continuously protect each other from predators in the wild, providing one another a sense of security. A study conducted by scientists in the Indian Institute of Science, Bengaluru, revealed that stress in an adult female elephant decreased with the number of female elephants in their herd.” – Wildlife SOS

In the wild, female elephants are known as fierce protectors. And when one of their sisters is suffering, they circle up around her. They close in tight, watch guard, and even kick dust around her to mask her vulnerable scent from predators. And yet, we are the same. This is who we are, and who we are meant to be for each other. Sometimes we’re the ones in the middle. Sometimes we’re the ones kicking up dust with fierce, fierce love.

But the circle remains.” – Festive Farm Co.

I’ve shared this information about elephants on the blog before. (Age breeds repetitiveness.) My closest friends from college and I have taken this information about elephants to heart, and we own the same elephant charms which we wear often to remind ourselves that we are there for each other, and that we have each other’s backs. I’ve also shared my love for the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust, which is an organization in Africa that cares for orphaned baby elephants until they are ready to be released into the wild again. Whenever I feel stressed or I feel a need to escape from all of the devastating news from around the world, I spend some time on the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust‘s website and I revel in the uplifting, courageous stories of their orphaned animals and their keepers, stemming from a beautiful, distant land.

I am bringing all of this up again, because my favorite for today is the Field Notes from the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust which is a monthly newsletter emailed to me at the first of every month. It is beautifully written by Angela Sheldrick whose mother founded the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust, and today’s offering was particularly poignant and beautiful. Angela entitled it “The Power of Love” and she talks about what makes for an excellent “keeper” of baby elephants. Here are some excerpts:

“In this month’s Field Notes, I wanted to delve into the ‘secret ingredient’ that it takes to successfully raise these extraordinary, complicated little creatures. . . .  Daphne (founder) realised that infant orphaned elephants didn’t just need the essentials. Shelter, sustenance, veterinary care — all these things were vital, but their psychological well-being hinged on much deeper, more nuanced care. . . . . As a steady succession of new rescues came into our care, it also became clear that raising infant orphaned elephants wasn’t a one-person job.  It was critical that orphans didn’t become overly dependent on any single individual — and equally, the task was too great for one person to shoulder alone. As our orphan herd grew, the role of Keepers became increasingly important. Today, we have more than 50 Keepers working across our five orphan units. . . . .    Instead of recruiting Keepers from one specific tribe or locality, we hire from across Kenya. Our logic is that each person, with their diverse background, opens a whole new dimension to the role. This strategy has the added bonus of fostering conservation awareness across the country. Keepers become vital ambassadors within their own communities. Over the years, many orphans have been saved by ordinary people who developed empathy for elephants through a Keeper who is a father, uncle, friend, or neighbour. . . . .

Elephants have a way of distilling a person to their purest form. Our orphans are quick to identify the ‘X factor’ that makes an excellent Keeper, which is why we ultimately put recruitment in their capable hands. New candidates join the orphan herd on a trial basis, and if they are embraced by the elephants, they are hired as a full-time Keeper. 

We call it the ‘X factor’, but to assign an all-encompassing human trait, it would be empathy. People who succeed with orphaned elephants are pure of heart, graced with a quiet confidence and unfaltering dedication.  . . . .People who possess these qualities are one in a million — yet, miraculously, they continue to find their way into our orbit . . . .”

Please read more about the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust at their website:

https://www.sheldrickwildlifetrust.org/

I highly recommend signing up for Angela’s field notes. I’m always excited to see them in my email’s inbox. Further, isn’t this a wonderful time of year to reflect on your own herd(s). Who are those strong females in your own life who have kicked up the dirt around you when you were feeling vulnerable? How about your keepers? Who in your life has that “X-factor” that helps distill you back to your own purest form (simply, love)? Who in your life has shown pureness of heart, quiet confidence, and unfaltering dedication to you? Who are your “one-in-your-millions”? Are you one of these precious keepers for others in your life, and also, importantly, for yourself?

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Aunties/Allomothers

I haven’t been a wonderful aunt. I love our nieces and our nephews, but I haven’t been a vital part of any of their lives. I’ve sent cards and gifts and loved on them during infrequent visits, but I don’t have a close, intimate relationship with any of them. This wasn’t something that I did, or chose to do consciously. I have my excuses: a large family of my own with a special needs child, geographic distance, sibling rivalries and distant relationships with our siblings, etc. But, whatever. I haven’t gone out of my way to be the kind of aunt whom I would like to be. This is not something that I am proud of, but in the words of my husband, when I confessed this fact to him recently is this: “It’s never too late.” It’s never too late.

And it isn’t too late. It’s only in the last five years or so, that both my husband and I have leaned heavily on the wisdom, and the love, and the strength, and the kindness of our own aunts, while dealing with various health issues and declines of our surviving parents. I am in my fifties and I do not know what I would have done without our aunts, especially in this last decade. Our aunts have allowed us to be children again, in a time when we still (surprisingly) desperately need “the adults” in our lives. They have given us the kind of unconditional love and support and comfort that only maternal, elder figures are intrinsically able to do, and I am forever grateful to all of them. Aunts, I love you and I respect you immensely. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Elephant tribes are mostly made of adult female elephants and the babies. Bull elephants are kicked out of the tribe when they reach early adulthood. Elephant mothers can rely on her “sisters” to take care of her babies, when she is not able to do so. Elephant mothers know that “her sisters” will protect her babies fiercely like they are her own. Elephant babies know that the tribe is full of female protectors who are helping their mothers to raise them. The elephant babies know that they have a strong, divine, feminine support surrounding and encircling them, to ensure their safety and well-being. An elephant tribe is mostly focused on protecting and nurturing their young. And elephant babies take a long time to grow up. This system is called “allomothering.” All of the female elephants in a tribe are “allomothers.”

I guess that I always knew that my husband and I, and our own babies, had this female tribe encircling us, but they have always given us the grace of space and understanding. Our aunts have always given us the respect and the autonomy to be our own people. Our aunts have given us an uncomplicated love. And I can continue this tradition with my own nieces and nephews. I can surround my own nieces and nephews with a force field of love, no matter how far away. I hope that our nieces and nephews know that no matter what and no matter when, they will always be the babies of my tribe, and I am willing, and I am able, and I am proud to do my duties of protection, nurturing, and support, no matter when that time comes for me to stand tall, with my ears flapping and my feet stomping and my head charging. I’ve had amazing examples to learn from, and so I must continue the tradition. It’s never too late.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Warm >

I didn’t feel like watching TV last night, so the quotes below are what I ended up taking screenshots of, while I was scrolling through Twitter, while cuddling on the couch with my husband and our Boykin spaniel, Trip. We had just gotten back from our nightly walk, and it was humid as could be (summer in Florida, need I say more?), and I felt so hot and grimy and sticky. Trip was also panting heavily from walking in the heat, but that overheated feeling never stops Trip from cuddling. With Trip, snuggling beats staying cool, Every. Single. Time. Therefore, I happily welcomed hot dog fur on my leg, and equally hot air being panted on to my skin, as we both felt utterly refreshed by our restoring mutual love and appreciation. Trip is absolutely right, Snuggling > Cool and Aloof, every day, all of the time.

The first story which I clicked on, from my Twitter feed, was a tweet from one of my all time favorites, The Sheldrick Wildlife Trust, which is a sanctuary located in Kenya, Africa. The Sheldrick Wildlife Trust rehabilitates orphaned elephant babies and other orphaned species, until they are ready to be on their own in the wild. The stories that The Sheldrick Wildlife Trust typically sends links to on Twitter, are usually stories about how the various orphans were rescued, and came to be at the sanctuary. Last night’s story was about baby Vaarti (which means “luck” in the local dialect). Most of the babies at the sanctuary are found out in the wild, by searchers who fly over the land, or by reports from locals who see babies, desperately trying to survive out in the wild, who have sadly lost their mothers, usually to poachers or due to drought and other natural disasters. Typically, these babies are brought to the sanctuary by rescue missions utilizing trucks, and planes and helicopters. However, Vaarti was actually delivered right up to the stockades by a young, wild female elephant, who was too young herself to be Vaarti’s mother, but who recognized that he needed help. This precious, young elephant had the innate sense to deliver Vaarti right up to the gates of the sanctuary. Once that she saw that Vaarti was in the hands of safekeeping at the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust, she disappeared back into the bush, and was never seen again. Angels on Earth, come in so many different beautiful forms, don’t they? Big Hearts > Cold hearts, every day, all of the time.

This next little tweet is super sweet, and also quite heartwarming:


“This kid probably 8/10 years old asked politely if he could pet my dog, I said yes. After he pet her, he hopped on his bike, popped a wheelie and said, “that was for you, thanks for letting me pet your dog.” Highlight of my day, to be honest.” (maryxwetzel, Twitter)

This tweet has a 154,000 likes from a Twitter account that has about 5,000 followers. It seems to me that we are all pretty hungry, for the good, little heartwarming stories wherever we can find them, these days. Heartwarming little stuff, such as stories about pop wheelies > Cold hard facts, every day, all of the time.

And this last tweet, just cracked me up. As a middle-aged woman about to release her youngest little baby out into the wilds of college in a few weeks, my mood meter has, admittedly, been all over the map:

“I had a mood ring once. It died of confusion.” – (Anais Ninja, Twitter)

If I personally were wearing a mood ring lately, it most likely would explode and make a mess all over my hand. Giggles are great for mood regulation. Self deprecating, warm-hearted humor, and downhome funny > Cold and aloof and serious, every day, all of the time.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Herd It’s Friday

Oh yeah its friday quotes friday happy friday friday quotes hello friday |  Its friday quotes, Hello friday, Happy friday

Good morning! Welcome to the lightest, airiest, “okay, now you can breathe out” day of the week! I LOVE Fridays! On Fridays, I list one, or sometimes even a few, of my favorite things. The things in life are what make life interesting, and material, and a tactile, sensory experience. Before I get to my favorite thing for today, I have a little personal story about sea anemone earrings. A while ago, I purchased perhaps the least expensive thing you could ever buy from Scully & Scully, a longstanding, staid, high-end store in New York City, that’s been around since 1934. I think I purchased probably a small set of coasters, or perhaps maybe even just one coaster, but ever since then, I get their catalogs and their online store pops up on my feed. For instance today, some offerings popped up on my Google, showing me a beautiful Meissen tureen for the bargain price of $125,000. (but does it come with free shipping?) Anyway, it’s a fun store to “window shop.” (If you like Herend figurines, they carry the entire line, and some.) The other day, as I was perusing the internet, and Scully & Scully popped up once again, suggesting that I might be interested in a pair of lovely $12,000 sea anemone earrings. They were gorgeous! And so unique! But sea anemone earrings are not what you call everyday wear, and I have two kids in college, and “good earrings” make me nervous because if I lose one, I’ll be sick about it for months, and I am not Kris Kardashian – I don’t have $12,000 to blow on sea anemone earrings, nor would I ever spend $12,000 on sea anemone earrings, because even if I were filthy rich, my ingrained midwestern sensibilities, practicalities and self judgments would intercede firmly and fiercely. But, man oh man, did I want me a pair of sea anemone earrings!! So guess what? I went to eBay, and Mercari, and the like, and I started feverously scrolling for sea anemone earrings and I found a really cute lime green pair made by Betsey Johnson for around $20, and I love them! And if I only wear them three times in my whole life before I lose one, I can live with that fact. And the point of my long winded story?! Go after what you want. Don’t get fixated on “THE one and only particular solution” to anything in life (i.e. job, person, house, college, vacation spot etc.) There are all sorts of “sea anemone earrings” out there, that will please you, and that will suit your particular needs and wants. Be open to what the Universe has to serve! Explore and enjoy!

On that note, I even have another bonus favorite for today, before I get to my real favorite. This is a favorite household tip. (insert my husband and children guffawing – housekeeping has never been my strong suit). If you have a clothes washer that tends to get smelly (ours is one of those. Years of washing six active, sweaty people’s clothes on a daily basis lends to pure stanky smelliness), pour a bottle of Listerine in it and run a cycle. The Listerine kills the bacteria that makes the washer smelly and the smell goes away instantly and you have a fresh, clean washer. I bought a drugstore brand version of mouthwash for $4, ran it in my washer, and it did the trick, after years of wasting money on “magic formulas” made specifically to clean washers which never worked. I found this household tip on one of my days of getting a little lost in clickbait (instead of doing laundry), and it turns out, the tip is a gamechanger. Enjoy!

Finally, here’s my real favorite of the day. I am fortunate to have a wonderful herd of elephants in my life. Actually, I am fortunate enough to have a few herds whom I rely on, when I lose my way. Do you? This is from the website that describes what these beautiful elephant ornaments really mean:

In the wild, female elephants are known as fierce protectors. They literally form a circle around sisters who are hurting or grieving. And often, they will kick dirt up around her to mask the scent of suffering…in turn, keeping her safe from predators.

And yet, we are the same. This is what we do. This is who we are. And this is who we are meant to be for each other. We all have elephants in our lives. Sometimes we are the ones in the middle, and sometimes we’re on the outside kicking up dirt with fierce, fierce love. But the circle remains.

The ornaments are as lovely as their sentiments. You can buy your herds some here as a way of letting them know how much you love and appreciate them:

Stainless "Friendship/Sisterhood" Elephant Ornament

And that is it for this Friday! Thank you for being one of my herds, dear readers! I hope that I have helped you in times that I have not been hurting and grieving, but feeling strong and positive. You have always surrounded me in times that I need it, and for that I am forever grateful. Have a wonderful weekend!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Full-On Friday

Image

Good morning, friends. Happy Friday! Happy Favorite Things Friday!! The above picture is from one of my only two favorites for the day. That picture above is of Apollo, who is an orphaned black rhino. Due to poaching and hunting, there are only about 5,000 wild black rhinos left in the world. Apollo is taken care of by the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust, an organization that is dedicated to taking care of orphaned elephants and rhinos, in order that they can be released back into the natural world, to be wild and free. Learn all about the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust here, at their website and watch their delightful videos of the precious, resilient, tough, very much alive orphans. https://www.sheldrickwildlifetrust.org/

In times of trouble, I find so much solace in animals and in nature. Don’t you?

Remember, little ones have big hearts. Little ones are amazingly resilient, resourceful and full of life. It’s hard to keep little ones down. Little ones are our future. Let’s all do everything that we can do, to make sure that it is a beautiful future worth having.

 “And though she be but little, she is fierce.”

–  William Shakespeare

“Mighty things from small beginnings grow.”

–  John Dryden

“The world is moved along by tiny pushes of each honest worker.”

– Helen Keller

“Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut, that held its ground.”

–  David Icke

And this is my new favorite song. (I find a lot of solace in music, too. Don’t you?) This song is a lovely way to bring in the weekend. Have a wonderful weekend. We’re all under the same sun.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.