birthdays Archives - Adulting: Second- Half

Tuesday’s Tidbits

+ Hi friends. I’ve missed you. I’ve missed Adulting- Second Half. In many ways, for many years, writing Adulting- Second Half on a daily basis was my second half of myself (the reflective half of myself who was pausing to reflect and to take notes of all of my inner and outer experiences, in this transformative time in my life). Adulting – Second Half is definitely one of my sacred spaces. Joseph Campbell describes our sacred spaces as places “where you can find yourself over and over again.” I’m here today because Life has finally gotten back to an even pace for me lately (which I realize is probably just a small respite, as the holidays are right upon us) but for now, I am enjoying it. Normal steady breathing, equilibrium, steady as she goes – I’m soaking in these feelings before the glitz and chaos of the holidays is upon us.

+ I just finished reading a book in a day and half. Yes, it was one of those books that was Just That Good. The book is called The Heaven & Earth Grocery Store by James McBride. McBride’s character development is unrivaled. I felt like I was feeling the character’s own feelings. If you want to get lost in a book, and lost in an interesting, thought provoking story, I highly recommend reading it.

+ And also, in the spirit of “Favorite Things Friday” even though it is only Tuesday, I recently purchased The Original Cincha Travel Belt. The Original Cincha Travel Belt is a seatbelt for luggage that you sit up on top your roller bags, when you are cruising through airports, city streets, train stations, etc. In my last travel experience, just last month, the straps were too long on my beautiful hot pink tote bag which I absolutely love, and so the bag would fall off of the sides of my suitcase, causing a great deal of imbalance and stoppage time and embarrassment and frustration. My beautiful, overstuffed bag was taking my roller suitcase, and thus also me, down with it. I haven’t tried my cincha travel belt yet, but when I read about it, it was one of those “Now why didn’t I think of that?” moments. I ordered one on Amazon right after I finished reading the article about it.

+ Every family has their “birthday clumps” in any given year, right? Our family’s birthday clumps are in late spring, and also during the holiday season. In late November throughout December, our family celebrates at least ten birthdays (including my own). For some reason this prompted my curious mind to find out how many people are born on any given day. The United Nations estimates that 385,000 babies are born in the world on any given day. Other interesting facts: September 9, September 19, and September 12 are among the most common birthdays in the United States. (This also tells me that perhaps people are also their horniest during the holiday season) And for obvious reasons, February 29th is the rarest birthday to have in the world. You have a 1 in 1,460 chance of being born on February 29th.

+ I was watching a video where Ben Affleck was being asked about what his thoughts were about AI. Did he think that the entertainment industry is going to be taken over and gobbled up by AI? It is Ben Affleck’s belief, that no, AI is not a real threat to filmmaking. Like all things, AI will change the film industry, but it is his belief, that for a long time coming, AI will still be just a part of making films. Ben Affleck believes that AI will make filmmaking less expensive, thus allowing more creators to come in with less barriers to entry, and thus allowing a proliferation of films like we have not yet seen (much like streaming has done in regards to TV shows). He agrees that AI will perhaps take over much of the human element of special effects, but Ben Affleck compares AI to a craftsman. AI learns its craft and imitates from all that has already been created. We humans are still the vessels of Creative Intelligence which brings thoughts and imagination and emotion into the material world to experience sensorily, and Ben Affleck believes that AI is just another craft or tool to allow us to do this more effectively and efficiently. He said this quote: “Craft is knowing how to work. Art is knowing when to stop.” Ben Affleck believes that AI will have a really hard time with knowing when to stop. On that note, I think that I will stop here for today.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Friday’s Tea

*****Happy Birthday, Big Red!! You were the one who made us want to keep on going!! You are one of the most self-actualized people I have ever known. I love you.*****

My friend recently came back from a business trip in the midwest and she said that she had tried the most fabulous tea she ever had tasted while she was out there. Naturally, I had to order some for myself. Today’s favorite is Fraser Tea, their Hot Spicy Cinnamon tea, in particular. It is delightfully flavorful tea that tastes slightly sweet despite having no added sugar or sweetener. When my order arrived, someone from the Fraser family wrote a lovely handwritten thank you note welcoming me to the Fraser Tea family. It was a delightful surprise!! You can order some Fraser Tea here, at their well-done website: https://frasertea.com/

It is also our spicy little brown dog’s birthday today (Trip is a Boykin spaniel). Trip turns four today and our eldest son said that means, that today, they are both turning 28! Have a fun and fabulous Friday, friends. See you tomorrow!!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

861. Are you a lover or a fighter?

Artsy Fartsy Friday

Good morning!! Happy Birthday to my second eldest baby, whose amazing curiosity and intellect and talent is only overshadowed by his huge, caring heart. I love you, G.

Friday is here!! It’s my favorite day of the week. I only discuss superfluous stuff on the blog on Fridays. We all need just one day of the week to just “Let it all be and just have some fun!” On Fridays, I mention one of my favorite things or songs or products or books or websites, etc. and I ask you to share your favorites in my Comments. (You guys tend to be a little stingy with your favorites. What gives? 😉 )

When I was in college, my sorority would hold a yearly event called Destination Unknown. I loved it. It was one of my favorite events of the year. We would all get into a travel bus and head out to an event, not knowing where we were going to end up. The social chairs were excellent at keeping the destinations top secret. My husband and I are going on a road trip, starting tomorrow. Completely against our typical Type-A style of going about things, we haven’t even made hotel arrangements. Where we end up landing, will be up to our divine intuitions (hopefully our intuitions will be in sync). I can’t wait for the adventure! Try to do a Destination Unknown sometime soon. (even if it is just for a day trip). Destination Unknowns actually tend to help you to get to know your own self, a whole lot better. The seat of your pants is stronger and more interesting than you ever thought to explore. Trust me on this.

My favorite, for this Friday morning, gave me the lovely image posted above. I follow Gregorio Catarino on Twitter, and he posts absolutely beautiful and fanciful artwork from all sorts of artists every single day. He makes my Twitter feed look like an Art Gallery. I highly recommend that you check him out. Interspersed with so much interesting, thought-provoking fodder and written brilliance that work as writing prompts for me, I also make sure that my Twitter feed has plenty of artwork and animal videos to keep me even, and mystified, and full of awe.

Have a wonderful holiday weekend, friends!!!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Journeys

****Happy Birthday to my beautiful first child!!! You are the one who inspired our family and made it our biggest desire to have even more children! (And don’t remind me that you are closer to age 30 than 20 ever again.) 😉

I am travelling right now. It is the first time that I have travelled in a while. It’s such an interesting experience to be out of your usual routine and element. I think that you become more self aware when you travel. You see contrasts to how your live, contrasts to your own environment, and climate, and schedule, and you delight in the novelty of new places, experiences and customs. You get ideas and inspirations for change, and you get a focused insight on what you miss the most in your own everyday life. Travelling is always beneficial for mind clearing, personal expansion and for getting a newfound appreciation for what makes your own life special to you. Tomorrow, I will be home and back to my normal routine. I feel refreshed, affirmed and a little tired. I feel expanded, enriched and grateful. See you tomorrow, friends!

“Travel is the only thing you buy that makes you richer” – Anonymous.

Monday-Funday

Good morning. I have to give a shoutout to my wonderful husband. Happy Birthday, love of my life!! Sorry that it fell on a Monday this year. 😉

I am having one of those rare, really fun Mondays, so I will just keep it to the meme for today. Have a great week, friends!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Friday, It’s Your Birthday!

Birthday on a Friday - Win Baby | Meme Generator

*****Happy 21st birthday to my baby boy! If there was ever a year that highlighted just how precious you (and your siblings and your father) are to me, this is the one. I’m in total awe of you. You are amazing. Let’s rock this birthday!

Happy Friday to everybody!! Happy “Favorite Things Friday!!” On most Fridays, I try to keep up with the fluff n’ stuff in life. On Fridays, I list three favorite products, or TV shows, or songs, or books, etc. that wow me. On Fridays, I’m a material girl living in a material world. If you are so inclined, please share your favorites in my Comments section. This time of year, we could all use some gift ideas. Here are my favorites for today:

A New Day Fuzzy Pearl Slippers – I’m currently rocking these babies on my feet as I write this blog post, and they. are. wonderful!! You can get these fun, fabulous slippers (if they aren’t already sold out) at Tarjhay (Target). I bought mine in beautiful powder blue, but they come in other lovely colors, as well. These slippers are incredibly comfortable and hilariously cute. They are made of faux fuzzy sheep’s wool, adorned with rows of faux pearls. These are the type of slippers that I may even buy two pairs of, because I know that I will be so sad when this pair wears out. Treat your tootsies! Your feet deserve this holiday gift, after a year of reliably getting you all around, to all of your places.

Lay-N-Go Magic Cosmetic Pouch – I haven’t even gotten mine in the mail yet and I already know that I am going to love it. In my experience, cosmetic bags are either too small (I need a lot of products to make this face come alive) or they are too large and clunky. This pouch is a cloth bag, that when opened, expands to be a cloth tray, so that all of your products are laying out, easy to find on a tray. Then, when you are done making up your face, you just pull the drawstrings and the tray turns back into a pouch, holding all of your magic elixirs. Brilliant! You can order one from Target, Amazon or Claire’s.

The Closet Safe Hanger – I recently bought this stealth contraption at a craft fair (and you can find cute ones on Etsy, or more industrial ones from Amazon). It was the last one left, because they were selling so quickly. This is a coat hanger that doubles as a place to keep things like your jewelry or your cash or your passports, well hidden from any would-be thieves. It has a zipper pouch to hold these items in it, but you would never know this, once a coat is hung on to the hanger. It is a good thing to bring along on a trip, to hang your coat on, at a hotel. Shifty and Nifty!!!

Enjoy your Friday, friends!!! See you tomorrow!!!

39 Funny Friday Quotes To Activate Your Weekend Mode

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

The Perfect Age

What is the perfect age? “Well, it’s the age where I finally understand my freedom, and I finally understand that I am free to create, and it’s the age that I am at my most beautiful.” And we say, by whose standards? In other words, who gets to decide the perfect age? And we say, rather than determining what the perfect age is, why not decide what the perfect state of being is—and then discover that you can find the perfect state of being at any age. – Esther Hicks

“All my days I have longed equally to travel the right road and to take my own errant path.” – Norwegian-Danish novelist Sigrid Undset, who won the Noble Prize for Literature

December is my birthday month and despite all of the distractions of the holidays, I have always liked having a December birthday. One, I like being a Sagittarius. I think that we are a real fun, interesting bunch. Two, all of this personal life reflection that seems to come around one’s birthday, is a perfect way to reflectively end one year, and to expectantly and excitedly start a new one.

Many of my elders and many older movie stars who have been interviewed, often say that despite their changing bodies and their evolving appearances that comes with aging, they have always felt like the same person inside, no matter what age they are, at any particular time. And that is because, at the deepest most eternal level of any of us, our forever souls are changeless and ageless. If you move past the crusty old body surface (which changes with aging), and you get past the personality and ego layers (which often have the tendency to change with experience and growth), you finally get to the peaceful center of anybody (which is eternal and never changes). And that tranquil, undisturbed center, which is in of all of us, is just lovingly and curiously and agelessly staying aware, without judgment, as it is experiencing life as a human being.

In short, there is nothing outside of us to search for in this life. “The perfect state of being” exists in all of us, and at any age, if you are willing to dig deep down past all of the other “stuff” – the layers of body and personality and ego. Our “perfect state of being” was always there and it will always be there. Birthday parties are amusing to our “perfect state of being”. Our “perfect state of being” likes to notice the sensations of excitement and anticipation that comes with birthdays and parties and celebrations, but in reality, our “perfect state of being/souls” are ageless and timeless and at perfect peace at all times.

Forgive me, readers. I do have a tendency to get deep around my birthday. Deep thinking and writing about my deep thinking is one of my greatest joys in life. Doing the things that I love to do, is when I feel most connected to the deepest, most centered part of myself. Staying connected to my “perfect state of being” makes me feel connected to eternity. How many candles do you put on a cake for an eternal soul?

“We know more about the surface of the sun than the deep earth,” says Rich Muller of the Lab’s Physics Division, a professor of physics at UC Berkeley.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Happy Birthday

“I have started this blog for me, but if it is helpful to others that would be grand. I have always felt that when people truly share what is really on their hearts, the world is a little less lonely. I don’t know where my second half of adulting leads me but I am certainly in the contemplation stage. And this new stage of my adventure is probably very similar to my son’s new experience – exciting, scary, exhilarating, freeing, introspective and necessary for us both to further develop into what we are meant to be in this mystery called Life.” – me (July 16, 2018)

Today is the second birthday of my precious creation, Adulting – Second Half. I started this blog on an emotional whim the day after my eldest son left our home, for his own adult life. I want to thank all of my loyal friends and readers (some of you who have been with me from the very beginning) from the bottom of my heart, which is overfilled with connection, gratitude, and love for all of you. You have given me your time, your validation, your insights and your love. Your gifts are so dear to me. I do not take you for granted. It is so wonderful to not have to write to a void. You are the other half to my writing process. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

When you start things on a whim, you don’t necessarily have a goal in mind. This blog was an impromptu outpouring of my emotions, my grief, my excitement, my fears – basically, my stored up heavy emotions, in the form of words. I think that’s mainly what the blog still is for me. Sometimes I get caught up into looking at the daily stats. Sometimes I think of grand marketing ideas of what to do with my writing, but mostly, every morning, I just get giddy to open up the browser to my blog and then open up my heart, to all of you. Writing my blog makes me excited for mornings, and I am honestly not a morning person.

A lot of life happens in two years. In the scheme of things we don’t necessarily think of two years as a long time. When we are dreading something arduous, we might even say, “Oh, I can handle it, it’s only two years!” And two years, does go by mighty fast and for some reason, years seem to go by, even exponentially faster, as we age. Perhaps this “speeding up” of time, is because we gain a deeper respect for the limited time we have to live, the closer we get to the reality of dying. Still, even as two years whizzes by, a lot of happenings happen in that relatively short amount of time. I can honestly say, that when I started my blog, going through a historic pandemic, never, ever, ever came to mind as a sub-plot.

Thank you for being my witnesses, my cheerleaders, my co-experiencers, and my teachers. Thank you for inspiring me to show up, to open up, and to practice and hone my skills. Thank you for sharing my life with me. This blog and by extension, the readers of this blog, will always be one of the fondest highlights of my life’s experiences. This I know for sure. You have changed my life for the better and that is a beautiful gift to give to anyone.

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Halfway There

Friends, today one of my daily inspirations/meditations said this, in a text: “Not only is this the 183rd day of the year, but there are 183 days left in 2020. Despite what’s happened, you are halfway to 2021. Be encouraged and keep going.”

Everyone I know, seems to need this message right now. In some ways, if feels like a lot of people in this world, are at a collective breaking point. This year has been “A LOT” and it feels like we are quickly heading to “TOO MUCH.” I’ve never craved boring and mundane and uneventful, more, in my entire life. I know that we are all going to be okay, but still . . . . enough already.

On a happier note, my middle son turns 22 today. I cannot believe that my children are really, really adults. I look at that age and I can no longer be in any more denial that my son is still a child. Being a parent is a constant cycle of surreal moments. Beautiful, sentimental and surreal moments.

July 1st was never an ideal day, in the way of birthday parties, when my son was growing up. Most of his friends were on summer vacations and trips, with his birthday being so close to July 4th. Some years, we celebrated my son’s half birthday. We had a big birthday party when he turned 8 and a half, during the winter, at an indoor rock climbing venue. We served a birthday cake that was cut in half. The above quote reminded me of those half birthday celebrations.

I think we all need a laugh today. This quote cracked me up (or maybe I’m just crackin’ up):

I took my father on a coach trip last summer.We were halfway there when the driver lost control of the coach, it flew down a hill around a bend and crashed through a brick wall. I wasn’t hurt but luckily my father had the presence of mind to kick my head in. – Chic Murray

Tomorrow, we’ll be closer to the light at the end of the tunnel, than the ugly hole that we entered when this year started. That’s a good thing!

Forties

Yesterday was my 49th birthday. I’m in the final year of my forties. My forties have been excruciating, enlightening, exciting, enlarging, enlivening, but mostly awakening. I honestly dreaded turning 40, but looking back, I see this decade as the most growing, interesting, “coming back to myself” period in my entire life. If you are one of my younger readers, don’t dread your forties. These middle years will give you a new lease on life. They will remind you of what is really important to you, and in that sense, your forties are very freeing. The forties help you to value yourself and to value your own life more than you ever have before, which in sort of a paradox way, helps you to respect others’ lives better. The forties decade requires you to enter a greater level of acceptance – an acceptance about aging, about the preciousness of time, about the fragility of life and the frailty of unhealthy relationships. You come to an acceptance of just how little you can control others, and you start to really hone in on the one person who you can control and improve – that being yourself. You experience a lot of lessons about change and about letting go, when you are in your forties. You often experience changes in vocations and locations, you experience the passing on of waning elders and the surrendering of your children, growing and moving on, into their own adult lives. You experience struggles and hardships and also, you offer support to others, in their times of tragedy, more than you probably had to deal with in your younger years. That’s okay, though. Because once you reach your forties, you have enough experience under your belt, to understand and to appreciate your own strength, your own stamina, and your own fortitude. In your forties, you believe in your own capabilities more than ever before, and your contemporaries also seem to share that steely confidence. You have enough courage to share with those in need, and enough humility to accept help when you need it. Life becomes more meaningful and precious in your forties. Nothing is taken for granted. You recognize your blessings so much more vividly than ever before, and that makes you feel more hopeful about growing old. You can only imagine that the richness of experiencing life, can only get more enhanced as you age, because on reflecting on the younger half of your life, you see the metamorphosis which you have already undergone and you feel very grateful. You feel so very, very, awestruck and grateful, all at the same time. Young people always think that we older people would go back in time and do it all over again, but I daresay, most of us would not. That’s an exhausting thought. We have earned where we are in our middle years, and that hard won acquired wisdom, is dearer for the time and the energy and the emotion that we’ve put into making our way into our middle years. Young readers, your forties aren’t likely to be easy. No one really gets ten years of “easy”, at any stage of the game. But your forties will better help to guide you to “simple”, in terms of peace, in terms of faith, in terms of Love. Your life will not become easy, but it will become more simple. And simply wonderful, at the same time.