July 2022 - Adulting: Second- Half

Soul Sunday

Good morning. Sundays are devoted to poetry on the blog. Every Sunday I try to inspire you to write some poetry and to share it. I rarely have anyone share their poems on the blog (except me), but I hope that you are still writing some poetry. It’s so good for your soul! Morgan Harper Nichols, the wonderful writer and musician, offers this way to get started on our own poetry, “the poetry of your life”:

“Places to find the hidden poetry of your life:

1. the last sentence of the last paragraph in your last journal entry

2. the words you meant to say just before you walked away

3. the words you use to describe the side character you wish had been a main character in the show

4. the way you talk about the strongest person you know

5. the way you explain why you said “I love you” that first time

6. the sentences you backspaced when you felt like you were just rambling

7. the last sentence of the long caption you wrote

8. the way you describe how you made it through something you never thought you would

Of course we are not going to find “hidden poetry” everywhere in everything, but I do believe the poetry in our lives is hidden in more places than we may realize.”

These are amazing prompts and ways to bring more creativity and soulfulness into your life. Give one or two of these writing ideas a chance today. You won’t be sorry. Poetry is cathartic.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Endings

We are currently going through an end-of-life situation with a relative and having to slog through the process of agonizing hopes and decisions. I don’t wish this predicament on anyone. It is one of those times in life when you realize that you really never knew what someone was going through, until you are going through it yourself.

I highly recommend watching these two short documentaries with loved ones. Although extremely emotional and difficult watches, they will really help with starting conversations about where everyone stands, on how they would like their end of life to look like. It’s important to know what your loved ones would really want for their own end of life passage into death.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Friday Favs

Hi friends. I’m not in my usual light-hearted Friday mood. Sorry. We are having to deal with a loved one’s serious health issues in our extended family, and all of the emotions and fears and decisions that this entails. Prayers and good vibes appreciated. This, too, shall pass . . .

Following in the tradition of Favorite Things Friday, my favorite for today has been around for a while, but for some reason I just finally stumbled upon them. I’ve always appreciated that when staying in hotels, they give you make-up remover wipes in individual packets. The typical make-up removal pads which are sold in big plastic blocks, tend to dry out, and the blocks are certainly not a convenient item to carry around in your purse. It turns out that Neutrogena sells bags of Make-up Remover towelettes, in individual, single-use packages. They are perfect and fragrance-free! I am thrilled to have finally discovered them.

You can find the towelettes at Target or Walmart or at this link on Amazon:

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

The Price

“You cannot have diamonds without paying the price. Even those who come by their diamonds via gifting, pay the diamond price one way or another. It is something to consider before purchase or reception.” _ unknown

(I think that the quote above is a fancy, riddle-ly way to say, “Be careful what you ask for.”)

Ever since the Mega Millions lottery has been over $500 million dollars, I’ve been buying a couple tickets. Why not? Whomever wins has the same abysmal odds as I do. It’s actually been an interesting, life-affirming self-awareness exercise. In thinking of what I would do if I won, I immediately thought about how I would want to keep the winning of the Mega Millions relatively secret, not just for safety, and not out of greed, but mostly because I wouldn’t want much to change in my life, at all. Of course, I would want to help out my friends and my family but I think that I would do so, in nonchalant, secretive ways. I wouldn’t want the important relationships in my life to change, and I am old enough, and I am wise enough to know that they inevitably would, if I were revealed to be an instant multi-millionaire.

We were having a Facetime catch-up with our three sons last night, and our middle son who is currently in medical school, said that he and some of his fellow students were talking about what they would do if they won the Mega Millions (which is now currently worth more than a billion dollars). Would they finish medical school? Would they go on to practice medicine? My son said that he thinks that he would finish pursuing his medical degree, but he is not sure if he would go on to do his residency. Some of his friends said that they would quit altogether. That made me sad. It is incredibly difficult to get into medical school. (I witnessed the process with my own eyes. I have mad respect for those in the medical fields. It’s one of those needle in a haystack processes, getting into medical school, and then being totally dedicated to the daunting undertaking of seeing it all through.) It made me secretly hope that none of these students would experience huge windfalls before they realized their dreams. We desperately need dedicated, smart, resilient people in our healthcare system.

I’ve written previously about a babysitter we had for our first son, when we were new parents. Her family won millions in the lottery. Her father told me that the best part of winning the lottery for him, was feeling “secure.” Later I learned that our babysitter’s parents divorced, and her father and her brother were killed in a four-wheeling accident. Security comes in many forms, and security comes in many illusions.

That being said, I’ll probably buy a couple of Mega Millions tickets before Friday. It’s fun to get caught up in the excitement. And if I win, you may never know . . . .

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Keep On

I have often thought that one of my biggest blessings in my personal life is that I get a lot of joy out of the little things. Like for instance, I spent all day yesterday in delicious, giddy anticipation of another episode of Better Call Saul being released to Amazon. All day long, I reminded myself, “We get to watch Better Call Saul tonight!” (and even more exciting was the fact that 89-year old actress Carol Burnett was featured in this particular episode. I watched The Carol Burnett Show all the time, when I was a little kid. Carol still has “it”! And earlier yesterday, my friend texted Joni Mitchell performing her incredible song, “Both Sides Now” at a recent folk festival. Joni is 78 and suffered from a debilitating brain aneurysm in 2015. The message I got from the Universe yesterday: Just keep doing what you love. Do what you love until you can’t do it. Love sustains you. Love creates you. Keep doing what you love in some form or another, until you can’t do it anymore. Be yourself until the very end. So, on that note, you and I will be here at the blog on a daily basis for a long, long time. I hope that you’ll stay with me!)

I typically reserve poetry for Sundays. However, I read a poem yesterday that profoundly touched me and I feel the need to share it today. We have an extended family member who has been riding a roller coaster of major health issues all month. This situation has been incredibly stressful and painful for her, and for all of us. I found myself doing my typical, yet not helpful habits of future-tripping, ruminating, second-guessing, etc. This poem helped me to find my center. If you need some summer centering, I hope that this poem touches you, too:

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

What Matters

Some things matter and some things don’t. The journey of life is about discovering the difference.

~ Alan Cohen

I love the story I read over the weekend in People magazine. A little girl was on a flight with her parents, and as they left the flight and were walking in the airport, in the wee hours of the morning (I think around 2 a.m.), the little girl panicked realizing that she had lost her first baby tooth and that she didn’t have it with her. It had probably fallen out on the plane. A pilot, seeing the little girl’s distress, promptly came over and wrote a note, vouching for the lost tooth, for the little girl to give to the Tooth Fairy. The note asked the Tooth Fairy to accept the note in lieu of the tooth. I am sure that the Tooth Fairy accepted the note.

Kindness matters.

I also read an excellent article by Paul Sutherland in Spirituality & Health magazine. The article was talking about perspective. He wrote this:

“I have been immersed in spirituality and religion my whole life. I met a few “repent or go to hell” fearmongering Christians, Muslims, and Jews along the way. Listening to the frown-lined devotee who is keen to save my soul, I ask: “Are you happy?”

I pause for their answer. I then ask: “Are you saved, or content that your life is reflective of Moses, Jesus, or Muhammed, or whoever guides your worship?”

I then listen and simply say, “Seems if I had a personal relationship with God, was feeling guided by God’s presence, and had faith, I would be so happy, optimistic, and joyful that I would hardly be able to contain myself. I certainly would not be running around judging people and tearing down those God created in God’s image.”

Paul also told the story about lamenting about all of the world’s ills to one of his teachers. His teacher let him go on and on and then said firmly, “Paul. Suffering exists so we have something to do.” Paul Sutherland ended his article with this statement:

“I realize that, actually, suffering can be our call to optimism, to act, to hope, and to work for a world where every person goes to bed feeling safe, happy, loved, full, connected, and optimistic about tomorrow.”

Perspective matters.

Masaru Emoto, a famous Japanese author and researcher, studied water crystals and what the effects of words and feelings have on water crystals. Here is an example of some of his findings:

Whether you believe these findings about water crystals to be true or not, we already know what Emoto was trying to convey:

Gratitude matters. Wisdom matters. Truth matters. Peace matters. Love matters.

It appears what really matters in this world, are those things which are eternal and recognizable to all of us, no matter our age, our country, our language, our backgrounds, our educations, and our beliefs.

Love matters. Love matters. Love matters.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Monday – Funday

credit: Rex Masters, Twitter

I hope that everyone is staying cool and comfortable and financially solvent this summer.

The wisest thing that I have read lately is from Taylor Blake, a young woman and a Florida farmer, who has recently received some fame for videos that she has put out on social media, featuring one of her dearest pets, an emu named Emmanuel. Taylor was recently a guest on the Jimmy Fallon show. This is what she recently wrote:

“I spent years of my life hating myself and blocking my own blessings because I allowed other people’s opinions of me to rule my life. I don’t care if you don’t think I am funny. I don’t care if you don’t like me. I love me and I will continue to create content that makes ME happy. <3”

That’s all I’ve got for a Monday. Have a great week!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Soul Sunday

Good morning. Welcome to poetry day on the blog. Earlier this week, when I was driving and listening to my playlist, a song came on that I hadn’t listened to in a long while. It is so soulful and deep and beautiful and when I got home, I wrote on the calendar that this song is a perfect one for a Sunday post. Sean Rowe wrote this song for his son, speaking of the fervent need for people to leave something of timeless meaning to this world before departing it. Sean is a folk singer, whose style is similar to Bob Dylan’s style. Here are the beautiful, poetic lyrics to “To Leave Something Behind” by Sean Rowe:

I cannot say that I know you well
But you can’t lie to me with all these books that you sell
I’m not trying to follow you to the end of the world
I’m just trying to leave something behind

Words have come from men and mouse
Oh, but I can’t help thinking that I have heard the wrong crowd
When all the water is gone my job will be too
So I’m trying to leave something behind

Oh, money is free but love costs more than our bread
And the ceiling is hard to reach
Oh, the future ahead is broken and red
And I’m trying to leave something behind

This whole world is a foreign land
We swallow the moon, but we do not know our own hand
Oh, we’re running with the case, but we ain’t got the gold
Yet we’re trying to leave something behind

My friends, I believe we are at the wrong fight
And I cannot read what I did not write
I’ve been to his house, but the master is gone
Yet we’re trying to leave something behind

Now there is a beast who has taken my brain
You can put me to bed, but you can’t feel my pain
When the machine has taken the soul from the man
It’s time to leave something behind

Oh, money is free but love costs more than our bread
And the ceiling is hard to reach
Oh, the future ahead is already dead
And it’s time to leave something behind

Now, I’ve got this feeling that I’m still at the shore
And pockets don’t know what it means to be poor
I can get through the wall if you give me a door
So I can leave something behind

Oh, wisdom is lost in the trees somewhere
Oh, you’re not gonna find it in some mental gray hair
It’s locked up from those who hurry ahead
And it’s time to leave something behind

Oh, money is free but love costs more than our bread
And the ceiling is hard to reach
When my son is a man, he will know what I meant

When I was just trying to leave something behind
And I’m trying to leave something behind

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Foothold

Over a decade ago, I talked my husband into get a pedicure with me (his one and only professional pedicure). His poor technician gained muscles and my husband went down a shoe size. This meme pricked this hint which I keep getting from the Universe, to clean out my cabinets. I have 8,364 facial products and I tend to mix them all together (I’m an amateur chemist), so I have no idea what actually works, or if any of them even do.

I was walking barefoot in the grass this morning while taking my dogs out. That is one of the most healing things that you can do for your feet, and your spirit and your heart. I read once that when ever you need to feel grounded and peaceful and comforted, walk barefoot in the grass and chant “Pachamama” which is the Incan word for “Mother Earth.” Try it. It works. Despite all of our mistakes and taking her for granted, Mother Earth does all that she can to keep us comforted and whole.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Friday Frolics

Happy Friday, dear readers!!! Happy Best Day of the Week!! I just read this quote from tut.com:

“From where I sit, it is a mystery to me, how so many can look back on their past with pride, yet frown with disappointment at their present. Somehow forgetting that back then, they were just as self-critical . . . “

Just for this weekend, don’t allow yourself to be self-critical. Nothing is nearly as important as it seems. Last night at dinner, my husband, our youngest son and I were laughing so hard as we were recounting the different times in which he and his siblings had gotten into trouble with us, when they were little kids and the various “punishments” we served. I am sure, that at these times, our kids were probably literally sick to their stomachs, and I was my own judge, juror, and executioner about my mothering skills, but now these recollections have all turned into silly, funny, and perhaps even “fond” memories. As I have been told many times in my own life and I will now repeat to you, “Lighten up!” Friday is an easy day to lighten up.

On Fridays, I stay lightened up by sharing a material favorite of mine, whether it be a product, a website, a service, a game, a book, etc. and I ask that you share your favorites in my Comments. I used to list three favorites on Fridays, here at the blog, but that got hard on a weekly basis, so I have whittled it down to one favorite, although today I am going to share one favorite, plus a bonus favorite. Without further ado:

The Umbrella Academy (Netflix) – I typically avoid comic book/super hero/apocalyptic type movies/TV shows as if they were COVID themselves, but for some reason, my husband and I got to watching episode one of The Umbrella Academy and now I am hooked. I like the character development, the unusual story line, and the visuals. It’s a show that makes me want to be more imaginative and creative in my own life and thoughts. It inspires stepping outside of the box. If you are looking to shake things up in your own preferences and psyche and everyday life, I recommend giving this show a look.

Bonus favorite: Fresh Market’s Almond Amaretto Coffee – Even if you don’t drink coffee, buy a bag of this stuff and liberally sniff the bag all day long. I’m not sure that there is a better smell on earth, other than newborn babies. And if you do love coffee, this is taking coffee to a whole new level. If you drink black coffee, this is a calorie free dessert. What could be better??

Have a fantastic weekend!

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.