The last few days I have been processing old “stuff”. We all have this “stuff” – aggravations, hurts, pains, annoyances, disappointments, outrages, etc. from the past that poke up their ugly heads out of nowhere, like moles out of holes. It is annoying when this happens, because usually, you forget that you still have this “stuff” lying around in your psyche, until something happens that screams, “Do something with your “stuff”!!! Your “stuff’s” still here!!!” And then, you emotionally react and you start playing “Whac-a-mole” as the “stuff” pops up all over the place, taunting you, and making you feel completely out of your mind.
Now, I’ve mentioned many times that I am a fire sign. I have an ugly temper. So my “Whac-a-mole” hammer goes at lightning speed and with great force. I go all out, when dealing with my “stuff” and my poor, dear, trusted loved ones get to hear all about my “Whac-a-mole” adventures, with all of my “stuff”, until their patience runs thin and they are ready to “whac-a-me.” And I don’t blame them. I just hope that they realize by now, that this is what I do. I stare down my “stuff” when it makes its appearance. I get angry, sad, frustrated, indignant and I yell and I scream and I talk and I cry and I text and I rant and I try to make of sense of it all, as I hammer down all of the “stuff” popping up all over the place. I exert my fire energy heartily. But, of course, we all know what fire does. Fire burns things. Quickly. So instead of me keeping on with chasing down and hammering away at all of my “stuff”, in order to push it into the underground, pretty soon my fire energy ramps up and it starts to burn my “stuff” all away, and I still smolder for a little bit, until all of the “stuff” is burned away clean. And then I feel better again. I feel more even keel and in control. I feel clean and clear. Certainly, I am not naïve to think that “my stuff” is all gone. There is a lot of “stuff” living under the surface holes, this I know. Once you have lived for over fifty years, “stuff” accumulates. I just hope that I have burned away some of my “stuff” for good this time. And I am grateful for the kindness and the love and the empathy and the patience and the forgiveness that my loved ones have shown me throughout the process. Their example helps me to give that kindness, love, empathy, patience, and forgiveness to others, and to myself, from their beautiful examples of love.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.