My husband and I were at an REO Speedwagon concert last night. It was awesome. I have to laugh, though. Lately, my concert experiences have been a little shocking. I look around at my fellow concert goers/band fans, and I am reminded of the story about when my husband’s grandmother moved into an assisted living facility. “Oh my, everyone’s so old here!” she said.
The band itself was ALIVE. They were rocking it, like nobody’s business. I think that if music people get past that crazy, drug-fueled, self-destructive stage that a lot them seem to go through, then musicians tend to age better than anyone I know. I am pretty certain that this probably has something to do with deeply loving what you do, and fully surrendering to, and engaging with your passions, as if your life depended on it.
On the subject of deep love, the last few weeks have been somewhat of an emotional roller coaster, for me. Big highs and big lows have been my experience, as of late. This week gets capped off with another baby “officially” leaving the nest for adulthood, when tomorrow, we take him to the city where he will be attending medical school. I told myself, at the beginning of this week, that my full focus was going to be on my own self-nurturing and care, just for this week. I made calls and I got all of my annual health appointments on the calendar. I received a wonderful and much-needed massage. And most importantly, I told myself that my thoughts were only going to be centered on myself, and my needs – just for this week.
Try that some time. (especially you mothering, nurturing types) If you watch your thoughts, you’d be shocked at how often your thoughts veer into lanes where they weren’t needed, nor invited to, and how these thoughts love to create problems that don’t even exist. I wish I had a dollar for every single time I had to shift my thoughts back to myself this week. I’d be able to book a ride on one of the billionaires’ space adventures, with all of that money.
Sometimes it is easier to distract ourselves with thinking about everyone else’s lives. We love our partners and our children and our extended family and our friends, so of course we think about everybody we love, a lot of the time. But a big part of loving everyone in our lives, is to love them with confidence and respect. It is knowing that they are capable of, and deserving of taking care of their own unique needs. One of the best ways to give our loved ones this magnanimous love, is to demonstrate it. I challenge you to steer your thoughts back to yourself and your self-care needs, just for today. Anytime that your mind wanders into worrying about, or looks to find ways to fix, or to control, or to change, or to “help” the important others in your life, decide to love them with a deep faith, and then quickly steer your thoughts back to yourself and your needs. Today, make your own self, your project of passion, and the object of your most loving nurturance and compassion.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.