Keep On

credit: @tinybuddha, Twitter

I have often thought that one of my biggest blessings in my personal life is that I get a lot of joy out of the little things. Like for instance, I spent all day yesterday in delicious, giddy anticipation of another episode of Better Call Saul being released to Amazon. All day long, I reminded myself, “We get to watch Better Call Saul tonight!” (and even more exciting was the fact that 89-year old actress Carol Burnett was featured in this particular episode. I watched The Carol Burnett Show all the time, when I was a little kid. Carol still has “it”! And earlier yesterday, my friend texted Joni Mitchell performing her incredible song, “Both Sides Now” at a recent folk festival. Joni is 78 and suffered from a debilitating brain aneurysm in 2015. The message I got from the Universe yesterday: Just keep doing what you love. Do what you love until you can’t do it. Love sustains you. Love creates you. Keep doing what you love in some form or another, until you can’t do it anymore. Be yourself until the very end. So, on that note, you and I will be here at the blog on a daily basis for a long, long time. I hope that you’ll stay with me!)

I typically reserve poetry for Sundays. However, I read a poem yesterday that profoundly touched me and I feel the need to share it today. We have an extended family member who has been riding a roller coaster of major health issues all month. This situation has been incredibly stressful and painful for her, and for all of us. I found myself doing my typical, yet not helpful habits of future-tripping, ruminating, second-guessing, etc. This poem helped me to find my center. If you need some summer centering, I hope that this poem touches you, too:

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

The Pedestal Prison

I’ve never been one for “hero worship.” Of course I admire many talented people, those whom I know, and those whom I don’t know, but I honestly think that it is unfair to put anyone on a pedestal. We are complicated creatures, us humans. We all have our strengths, and we all have our foibles. If you asked me who I most admire, I would probably pick some of my family members and friends, but that is most likely, because these are the people I know most intimately. Further, I choose my admirations in categories. Someone with an admirable knack for crafting, might not be the life of the party. I admire both traits. I am grateful that we have the quiet creators among the fun-loving spotlighters. I am grateful for the variety in everything (and everyone), which Life has allowed us to experience.

Recently, I was having a conversation with people who were talking about their heroes, and the people whom they admire the most. My mind started scrambling. I was looking for some solid, clever answer when it came to my turn, but that would have been so fake and contrived. Then I started worrying that maybe since I didn’t actually have one or two particular role models, that meant that I was a self-absorbed narcissist. Luckily, the subject got changed when before we got to my turn.

I am writing all of this, as a lead-up to the fact, that hearing about Bill and Melinda Gates getting divorced, really and completely, got to me yesterday. And these deep feelings truly surprised me. I don’t know Bill and Melinda, personally, of course. They did get married the same year that my husband and I got married. I know that no one would be able to disassemble twenty-seven years of creating a shared family and a shared life (not to mention a billions of dollars charitable foundation), without a great deal of contemplation, and a strong effort to keep it all together. I don’t judge the Gates. I was just more amazed about how sad and disillusioned that I felt about their announcement. Perhaps I did have the Gates on a pedestal, after all. Perhaps, I saw them as the epitome of the all the way around, grounded, healthy, amazing success story (which, I suppose, is my own personal, particular definition of success). Maybe I saw the Gates as “The Whole Package, plus a Bag of Chips”, instead of just two very talented, generous people doing their best, in this complicated world which we all navigate together. Things that make you go hmmmmm . . . . .

“A pedestal is as much a prison as any small, confined space.” – Gloria Steinem

“I think we do people a great disservice when putting them on a pedestal and not allowing them to be human.” – Linda Thompson

“The moment you put someone on a pedestal, they will look down upon you. The trick is respecting each other equally.” – Teresa Mummert

Don't put me on a pedestal, for I will surely fall. Just love me as I  am, weaknesses, flaws, and all. | Words, Cool words, Beautiful quotes

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.