Tag: sons

Monday – Funday

This is a rare day. Are any of you going to be able to fully witness it? According to NASA, the next total solar eclipse won’t be until August 23, 2044 and its full effect will only be able to be seen in three states in the United States. It’s a special day today!

This weekend I was reminded that the combination of our two water loving dogs, Ralphie, the Labrador retriever and Trip, the Boykin spaniel, together in our pool area, does not make for a relaxing evening. Inevitably, in order to have peace and less frenzied energy, we end up having to banish one of the boys to another part of the house. This weekend it was Trip’s turn for banishment. Josie, our rough collie, does fine herding one canine swimmer, but “having” to keep an eye on two “furmaids”, just puts her over the top.

This got me to thinking that often people and things that are wonderful individually can often make dangerous combinations. Our eldest son and our youngest son are funny and gregarious. They have us rolling with laughter all of the time. However, I have known not to sit them together at restaurants and certainly not in church pews during serious ceremonies such as funerals, since they were little boys. Funny and gregarious can become obnoxious, loud and over-the-top combustible, with the shared antics of these two young men, in seconds flat.

I looked up on the internet “some of the worst combinations”. Reddit users had some good and funny answers: “toothpaste and orange juice”, “rubbing alcohol and paper cuts”, “wasabi on your fingers and rubbing your eyes”, “milk and pickles”, “using your cell phone and driving” . . . . Some things are just better experienced on an individual basis.

Of course, some things are best experienced together. Sodium and chloride are poisonous substances until they are combined to make table salt. Two shoes is always better than one shoe. And I do love hearing all three dogs snoring in unison, in their beds, at the foot of our own bed, when we go to sleep at night. That chorus is comforting music to my ears.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

2013. If you got lost in the woods, what would you do?

Favorite Color Friday

Credit: EmilyMichaelDesigns, Etsy

Happy Friday!! Happy Favorite Things Friday!! Happy “Chasing the Sunshine Springtime!!” On Fridays, I don’t discuss anything particularly insightful. On Fridays, I look to the material things which makes life interesting and delightful. On Fridays, I give myself a break from Myself. (does that even make sense?)

The best compliment that I can give to my three sons is that they make me wish that I had a brother, in a big way. Our three sons are really good brothers to our only daughter and I appreciate this so much. Her brothers and her father, have made my daughter love and respect men, and yet also expect a lot from the men in her life. (Thank you, guys. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.) I bring this up today, on Favorite Things Friday because today’s favorite comes from a birthday present that one of my sons got for his sister for her upcoming birthday. Apparently this stuff is all of the rage, mostly because it smells so good! (and I love me a good scent for sure! The sense of smell might be my favorite of all of our senses.) Sol de Janeiro products supposedly smell like heaven. I, of course, decided that I needed to order some fragrance mists for myself from this line, to match the birthday girl. My daughter recommended number 62 and number 68 for starters. There is nothing like a smell that reminds you of your favorite beach vacation.

Have a wonderful weekend, friends!!

“Smell is a potent wizard that transports you across thousands of miles and all the years you have lived.” – Helen Keller.

“Perfume is a story in odor, sometimes poetry in memory.” – Jean-Claude Ellena

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:

1150. How can you live with more intention?

Soul Sunday

Good morning. Yesterday we launched another baby into the big, bad world. Our youngest son moved out of the house, and he starts his first “real” job on Monday, since graduating from college. Our youngest son has epilepsy, and he has experienced a lot of ups and downs throughout his young life, until we figured out a combination of medications that work to keep him seizure free. Readers, please let’s agree to keep all of our beautiful children in our shared nightly good thoughts and prayers. That thought gives me a great deal of comfort. Our children and grandchildren are the future. Sundays are devoted to poetry on the blog. Here is my poem for today:

Moon’s in Sagittarius

Last night was our shared full moon,

my blue-eyed baby with your angel kiss.

It filled the dark skies with thrill for June,

And hopefully many more months of bliss.

You are ready. Launch your arrows into the sky.

I can’t wait to see where they may land.

Don’t be afraid to fail. Just try. Just fly.

And when you feel unsure, know my heart’s in your hand.

You are raised. You are a man. You’re up to the task.

You’ve overcome so much in your young life already.

So, in the light of these triumphs, remember to bask.

Stay focused, stay true, stay strong, and stay steady.

When you look at the night sky and peer at the moon,

Remember that we both gaze at the same one,

Take it day by day, while humming to your own tune,

I love you and I’m proud of you, my dear blue-eyed son.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

The Root of All Evil

“Insecurity is the root of all “evil”. Not money, not drugs, not greed or lust. These things are just symptoms of being raised with a lack of sense of self. Parents wonder how they can protect their children from the world. Not understanding that when children are raised in emotionally healthy, secure environments where they’re fully able to be themselves – they don’t need protection. They’re prepared.” – Dr. Nicole LePera

Late this week, our middle son asked if he could come home (our home) for the weekend. He wanted a break from the bustling city that he lives smack dab in the middle of, and he is anticipating a really busy fall, so he thought that it would be a good time to come visit us. We, of course, were delighted. Getting past my own insecure fears of “Is everything okay? Does he have something serious to discuss with us?”, I decided to stop with the doomsday thoughts and to just enjoy the experience of having our youngest two sons home with us, out of their own volition. (our youngest son is living with us, this summer, while he does an internship in our city) So far, the visit has been wonderful. Currently, our middle son is biking with his father, as I write this. Our son didn’t get in until late last night, because he had an exam to take and a paper to finish. So once again, I had to talk myself out of my own insecure fears of our son being exhausted and driving on the road, late at night. He arrived here happily, confidently, and all in one piece.

I absolutely believe that most of the world’s ails are caused by unhappy people and I agree with Dr. LePera, that most unhappiness comes from insecurities. We did our very best to raise secure-in-themselves children. There is no one in the world who never, ever feels insecure, but people who confidently know themselves seem to be able to get past their insecurities quicker, and with less damage to themselves (and to others). Still, I have come to realize that being a mother, has added a whole new nest of insecurities to the ones I already have brewing in my own pot. And even though my children are grown, I see that I still host some insecurities about my mothering skills and abilities. (Does our son really want to come home for “no reason” other than he loves us? Did we do a good enough job raising a child who will know and honor, when he is too tired and worn out to drive long distances at night??)

I have come to peace that none of us will never be out of “The School of Life” until we take our last dying breaths. We will never have it all figured out, but we can always improve and be a little better than we were, the day before, if we are willing to be honest with ourselves and to try.

I cut and pasted these steps to help lessen your own insecurities, from an excellent article from BetterUp. You can read the whole article by Shonna Waters, by clicking on the highlighted words below:

  1. Confront your feelings rather than avoid them.
  2. Have a growth mindset and set solid goals.
  3. Prepare yourself for setbacks but don’t let them control you.
  4. Embrace all of your characteristics and passions.
  5. Challenge your negative thoughts and think critically.
  6. Surround yourself with positive, encouraging people.
  7. Listen to other people’s stories about overcoming their insecurities.
  8. Try new things that make you happy.
  9. Let go of people and situations that fuel your insecurities.
  10. Be proud of your progress, no matter how big or small it is.

Don’t be afraid to admit to your insecurities. We all have them, and they can only be cured, by admitting to them in the first place. As Dr. LePera says, when a person is fully themselves, that is when they are best prepared and protected for dealing with life’s challenges. You can never be fully yourself, until you accept and get to know, and embrace all parts of yourself, even the parts which feel a little scared and insecure, at times.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

A New Adventure

We are headed out to start the first of the activities on the schedule for parents’ weekend, sponsored by our sons’ fraternity. I’m as prepared as one can be for . . . hatchet throwing. It seems to be the new in-vogue activity these days. It used to be mystery rooms and just my luck, just in time for parents’ weekend for a fraternity, hatchet throwing is now all of the rage. And it is right next to a brewery. Brilliant.

I’ll be giving my sons, the two biological brothers and also fraternity brothers, a little gift in an envelope which I have prepared. I went through old family photographs last night and I found the most adorable pictures of the two brothers, doing their thing together, when they were little toddlers. I think their other fraternity brothers will get a kick out of it all. I will be careful that these photographs aren’t used as targets, though. Those pictures are among the most precious things we own.

If tomorrow’s blog looks like this:

‘avjhpoaiujn;oa iowlnh 9 oao;janhpnvlaj

You’ll know that I wasn’t all that successful at hatchet throwing. I am aiming to not lose any of my bodily extremities, nor my mind. My intentions are good. I always aim to be a “cool mom” now that my kids are grown. I can’t say that I often succeed, but I try.

Are you passing on love, or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Ginger Kids

My two eldest sons are redheads or what now seems to be more commonly called “gingers”.  My youngest two children are brunettes.  I sometimes break them down to the “reds” and the “browns.”  When you have a big family, you’re always shortening things, categorizing; it’s just easier that way.  My husband and I are both brunettes so we were a little bit surprised, at first when our first little ginger was born.

It turns out that both my husband and I carry the recessive gene for red hair.  It’s the only way a “ginger” can occur.  Only 2 percent of the world’s population are natural redheads. Unfortunately, there are thoughts that someday, due to the fact that the recessive gene could go extinct, red-headed people will be a thing of the past.  How sad that would be!  My sons both have brown eyes, but if you are a natural redhead with blue eyes, you have the rarest combination on the face of the earth.  How lovely and special!!

I’ve always been attracted to redheaded people since I was a little girl.  The fact was so obvious, that when I was a little girl, my mother cut out a magazine article featuring redheaded children and she wrote, “Your future kids . . . ” on top of the article.  She was right!  I think redheaded people just exude warmth!  It’s not just their hair, it’s their whole energy field.  They radiate a fiery passion that just glistens out to the ends of their hair reminding us of just how exciting life can be.

I read once that you can’t be anonymous and be a redhead.  I believe that.  I bet that there are very few redheaded spies.  My eldest son won the yearbook senior superlative, “Most Likely To Always Be Remembered.”  He’s 6’2″ with a headful of curly red hair and a big, deep, loud laugh.  We took our eldest son to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico when he was two and when we were touring the local town, the elderly women would come up to him to touch his hair for luck.   He happily obliged.  He knows that he is lucky.

When we are young we want to “fit in”, melt in with the crowd.  I think redheaded people are blessed in knowing that they just don’t “blend in,” right from the very beginning so they don’t ever get caught up in that nonsense of sameness.  Now that I’m 47, I think I feel more internally redheaded in that sense, than I ever have been.  I like being an individual.  I feel more confident “owning” who I am.  Of course, at my age, my real hair color has become a mystery thanks to the marvels of my stylist, but if I ever get bored, red might be the color to try.