“Here’s the thing – I’m friends with George Bush.
“In fact, I’m friends with a lot of people who don’t share the same beliefs that I have. We’re all different, and I think we’ve forgotten that that’s okay, that we’re all different.”
The presenter used the example that while she wishes people didn’t wear real fur, she has a lot of friends who do.
“But just because I don’t agree with someone on everything, doesn’t mean that I’m not going to be friends with them,” DeGeneres said.
-From the Ellen Degeneres show, after the fallout of her sitting next to George W. Bush during a football game
You know that I have sidestepped and tried to stay away from controversy, for the most part, in my blog. I don’t like politics (nor politicians, frankly), I believe that there are many paths to God, and I certainly don’t care to have people cram their opinions and “shoulds” down my throat. Further, if I just don’t agree with the other person’s opinion, I don’t care to be made out as an “idiot” or even worse, a “villian.” I respect everyone’s right to their own viewpoint, and I expect the same respect in return. No harm, no foul.
What I was trying to get across in my blog that I wrote on Tuesday (Love. Spirit. Life.) was that if we can’t have honest discourse and questioning with each other about our differences, if we have to feel fearful of admitting our conflicted thoughts and feelings and beliefs, all that have arisen from our own unique and personal experiences – these very experiences that have helped shape our own lifetime perspectives, how are we ever going to evolve and move forward to a more enlightened, cohesive state of being, as a whole? How are we ever going to feel that we are leaving a good world for our children and our grandchildren, when we pick divisiveness and exclusivity in our “clubs of thought” over our love for the whole of humanity?
If I were to only choose to associate with people who felt the exact same way as I do about all things, than I wouldn’t have one single friend. In fact, the six people who I love the most in this world, my immediate family, would no longer be able to associate with each other. In the last presidential election, the voting members of our family of six, effectively cancelled each others’ votes out.
We all complain about the horrifying polarization of our current society (that seems like the one thing most of us agree about), yet we start out with the assumption that anyone who doesn’t see things the way that we do, is evil or stupid – people to be feared and ostracized. How are we ever going to experience empathy, understanding and compromise, if we are made to feel that we can’t even express our own viewpoints for fear of being excommunicated from our communities, our churches, our friend groups, perhaps even our own families?!? What is our highest law? Shouldn’t it be Love?!? Does Love behave this way?!?
We all complain about the horrific statements made anonymously on the internet. Still, even with these forums, we have gotten so “careful” that I have even seen anonymous Comments, start off with, “I’m probably going to be skewered for this, but here goes . . . .”
We will never be entirely unified with anyone about everything. But if we choose to only communicate and commune with people who are close enough to “being just like us”, we will never, ever bridge these ever widening gaps. We will just add more suspicion, paranoia and make assumptions about other people, without ever trying to see them as most importantly, other people who likely have the very same deepest, core concerns as us. (love, safety, health, security, and peace for our families and our friends, our communities, and our world)
I am always amused when people tell me I’m so “honest” in my blog. Why shouldn’t we all be “honest”? I’m not saying cruel, and thoughtless and blunt. (which unfortunately, I have been these things, as well, and I am not proud of that fact) Why do we fear having open, authentic discourse? I think it is because the new way of communicating seems to be more “cram my righteous thoughts, ‘my holier than thou beliefs’ down your throat” and if you don’t agree with me, I will attack you with name-calling, bullying, shaming and ganging up on you, and then I will never speak to you (or anyone who you associate with) again.”
What ever happened to really hearing each other, trying to understand where the other person is coming from? What every happened to saying, “This is how I am seeing and experiencing and processing what is going on. Tell me your thoughts. Where am I wrong? What am I missing?” Whatever happened to the belief that in the end, we are so much better off looking for our connections, than staying in our far corners of disconnect??
I don’t like rants. I just wrote one. I am only human. Aren’t we all???
“Discussions are always better than arguments, because an argument is to find out WHO is right, and a discussion is to find our WHAT is right.” – unknown