Tag: memories

I Miss You

Hello my dear friends and readers! I miss you. I am in one of the most beautiful, peaceful places which I have ever been on this Earth. Particularly on this trip, I have come to realize that there is a lot of “stuff” in my life that I do not need, nor do I miss, but writing my blog and communing with my readers, definitely goes on to the column of things which I miss a lot about my daily routine at home. You, my treasured friends and readers, and my writing of Adulting – Second Half on a daily basis, are right up there, (along with our three precious fur babies), on the list of Things That I Most Miss About Home. I also forgot to bring perfume on this trip and I LOVE perfume. And I am currently writing this after a full day of hiking and touring and swimming and riding for hours in a stuffy van, and so honestly, right now, my perfume is number one on the list of Things That I Most Miss About Home. (Kidding!) You (and our puppies) are definitely what I miss the most, while I am away with my family on our vacation. But right now, perfume is a close, close second.

Despite reflecting on the fact, that there are so little material things that I really do need, to make me happy, and also, realizing that it is my life’s adventures, and the memories that come with these adventures which are truly my most cherished possessions, I still can’t help myself. I buy schlock. Above is one of the pieces of schlock that I just had to have as a souvenir from my current trip, because to me it represents our family – me and the five people whom I love more than life itself. I bought this trinket because it represents yet another amazing family adventure to me, and it will serve as a reminder of our shared laughs and our shared wonders and shared joys and even our shared sorrows. Mostly, it reminds me of our shared deep, unrelenting care and love. In short, this goofy souvenir makes my heart smile, and it will for years to come.

We have probably 1000s of pictures from this trip, we have shared family stories that come from this trip which will undoubtedly last in our family lore for years to come, but this silly little kitschy dust collector, will represent all of that for me, in just one glance. I must remember this the next time I rummage through an antique store, or an estate sale. A lot of the things that we have in our lives mean so much more than the inexpensive materials that make them, or their relatively insignificance in the way of daily practical usage. Symbols and signs represent the meaning which we find in life, in simple and yet in profound ways. Religious and spiritual places are full of symbols and signs. Is it possible that my silly, googly-eyed souvenir is sacred? It is to me.

Some day, perhaps when I am long gone, someone will pick up this funny little figurine and pitch it into the garbage or they will sell it for a dollar in a garage sale, and they won’t realize it’s true significance. They won’t realize all of the love and wonder and happiness and peacefulness that it holds. They won’t hear the heart beating in it. And that’s okay. It will transform into a new form of the energy that it forever holds. The souvenir’s form never really mattered anyway. The love and the memories that it represents will never, ever go away. And that’s what makes this little rock family, one of the most beautiful things that I have ever owned.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Grand Memories

Over a decade ago, some friends of mine from college and I, decided to try a little experiment. We were in our late thirties and we had well-established families. We all had at least three kids (my family had the biggest family, consisting of four children). We thought that it could be neat and fun, to attempt a shared family vacation. We imagined renting a huge, rambling beach house, taking turns making meals, picking restaurants, sharing laughs, fun, memories and getting a slowed-down chance to really get to know each other’s babies and husbands, a little bit better. Going into it, I knew that this particular trip was either going to be absolutely fantastic or extremely hellish, nothing in between. Our family was accustomed to taking our own private family trips. We already always had enough chaos going on between the six of us. I couldn’t fully fathom what adding eight more adults and twelve more kids into the mix, was going to bring, other than knowing that it would be either exponentially great or exponentially horrible. It turns out that the trip was FABULOUS! Exponentially.

We had such an amazing time. My favorite memory of that long ago get-together, is all twenty-six of us, combing the beach at night, with head lamps and flashlights and buckets, foraging for night crabs. Some of us got cut by pincers (probably deservedly) and some of us were never agile enough to catch a crab (me and some of the babies), but the merriment, the excitement, and the in-the-moment joyousness of the event is something that I will never, ever forget. The kooky babysitters who we hired, making shell and sea grass jewelry with the young ladies of the group, my friend who grew up in Baltimore teaching us the proper way to truly get your money’s worth out of getting all of the meat (and I mean ALL) out of a boiled crab, and the early morning jaunts to the decadent doughnut shop, are all part of a wonderful collection of recollections, that are kept in a treasured, safe corner of my still solid memory bank. The evening card games ended each night in hilarity (and even some tension), as all of us adults were a little more hyper-competitive than any of us ever wanted to admit. Then, even later into the night, one of us couples would steal off into the night, climbing the dunes, under the romantic moonlight, knowing that our babies were safe and sound, with trusted, loving friends. It was a beautiful experience. The only negative thing that I brought back from that trip was that one of my friends introduced my children to peanut butter and marshmallow fluff sandwiches. I was never able to avoid the jars of marshmallow fluff at the grocery store after that trip, without all of my children chorusing together, in loud begging and whining tones, for us to purchase at least one jar. My house was forever-filled with extremely sticky, dirty fingerprints after that vacation. And it was totally worth it.

Unfortunately, we were never really able to completely recapture that multi-family beach experience again. The following years included the recession, out of state moves, marriage break-ups, friendship shake-ups, and the inevitable over-taxed schedules of maturing families. Our family, having the eldest of the children and having been the ones who moved the furthest away, was never able to be part of some of the smaller get-togethers that happened after that wonderful inaugural event. So, earlier this month, when one of my girlfriends offered up her house, for a New Year’s Eve reunion of this wonderful group of friends and our families, we jumped on it! The kids are all older now, mostly in their late years of high school and college. Only my two youngest kids will be coming along on the trip with my husband and I, this go around. Some of the other kids of the group have to stay home for work obligations, as well. Us parents have a few more wrinkles and a lot more gray hair (and in some cases, less hair) than we had on that long-ago beach trip, over ten years ago. Still, I no longer have to question which way this trip is going to go. This time, I already know that it is going to be fabulous, and I have an empty vault in my memory bank, just waiting to be filled up with the best treasures of all – grand memories, the kind of memories that make up a person’s life.