Tag: jessica lanyadoo

Let It Go (Again)

After my rant yesterday, you’ll be happy to know that I started my Zen meditation/art class yesterday and it was wonderful. And very much needed by me, at so many different levels. I think that the fun part of this empty nest stage in life is discovering yourself again. Surprising yourself about what intrigues you. Reminding yourself about what stirs your own inner core. You become your own major focus and project again, and in the beginning, it’s sort of a strange sensation. You almost feel a little shy and apprehensive, but you also feel a delightful curiosity and pleasure to get reacquainted with yourself. It’s like entering some place that you have been to long, long ago, but this time, you are seeing this place and visiting it again with “fresh eyes.” It’s almost like having a new puppy (or seeing glimpses of that “puppy” in your old dog self). Self discovery and rediscovery are the true blessings of the different stages of our lives.

I have written about “letting go” of outcomes, so many times on this blog, I think there are several dedicated pages and pages to the “letting go” topic. It seems to be one of those lessons in my own life that is going to keep on coming and coming and coming to me, until I finally “get it” and move on and let go . . . (ha!)

“If you hold on to the past (or even something in your present) too tightly, it will lead to anxiety and limit your perception of your options. Have faith in your ability to show up and cope with situations, even if they’re hard. Just because you don’t have evidence yet, doesn’t mean you’re not moving in the right direction.” – Jessica Lanyadoo

I like this reminder that I read yesterday. When you are holding on to your own limited sights and perceptions, and you hold on to what you want an outcome to be and believe that it should be, like a pitbull on a bone (and I am a stubborn old dog who is great at hanging on to my gnarly, rigid, well chewed on bones), you spend your present moments mired in anxiety and frustration and irritation. At this middle-aged stage of our lives, we’ve proven to ourselves, and to many others, the stones which we have to live life. We have gotten through at least 45+ years of life, and all of the ups and the downs and the surprises and the joys and the sorrows and the sweet stuff and the hard stuff and stuff that we never thought we could make it through, but we did. We did! We aren’t just survivors. We’re thrivers. So, word to me – “stubborn pitbull lady”, once you’ve done everything that is in your power to protect your bones, gather more bones, and enjoy your bones, it is then time to let some of them go. Bury the bones for later, or perhaps, for maybe never again. Just savor the bones that are fun to enjoy gnawing on in the present, and keep the faith that there will be more bones to enjoy in each coming day.

“Things don’t always go the way you planned. Fortunately.” – Anonymous

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Wednesday’s Whimsies

+ ” . . . .you are not supposed to be perfect. And neither is your mom, and neither is your ex, and neither is anyone. We’re not supposed to be perfect. The people you look up to, they’re not perfect. Nobody’s perfect. We’re not supposed to be perfect. We’re supposed to be a mess. So can you be the most authentic, aligned, healthy, well-adjusted version of the mess that you are?” – Jessica Lanyadoo

So the main goal is to be less messy of a mess, I guess.

+ I read that an excellent question to ask yourself is, “Does this really need a response?”

We are such a fast moving society. We often tend to react versus respond to situations, and it is interesting to ponder how much of anything actually even really requires a response. Along those lines I read something the other day that said to allow yourself to go ahead and act on a thought/inclination/idea/impulse, but just make sure that you are actually “acting on” something, and not just “acting out.”

+ I thought that this was a beautiful explanation by the painter, Pete Sandker, about why he paints:

“I remember when I was younger and driving out west with my family and seeing these incredible mountains and waterfalls and groves of aspen trees in the fall and being overcome with this feeling that I wanted to somehow do something about all the beauty I was seeing. Like this feeling I wanted to just grab a whole mountain in my hands and drink the ocean.

. . . . it was almost a sad feeling that I was seeing something like that and then would have to go home and just forget about it and take out the garbage and pay the bills . . . . so now I have this painting thing to channel just a bit of that and feel satisfied that I did something about what I saw.”

This begs the question, what are you doing about all of the beauty that you are seeing and experiencing in the moment, or have seen/experienced in your lifetime? Do you revisit all of the photographs which you have taken? Do you take time to sit and soak in your loveliest memories? Do you look at what your food looks like, and do you spend some time really tasting it, before you swallow? Do you keep mementos from your favorite trips and holidays around your living space to remind you of just a smidgen of the beauty which you have experienced in your own lifetime? Another question I read over the weekend struck me enough to write it on my calendar (and unfortunately I don’t remember to whom to give credit): Where are you directing your energy? Do yourself a favor today, and direct a good amount of your energy towards the beauty. It’s everywhere.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.