“All is temporary. Any effort to acquire or cling to things will be tempered by this wisdom. Accept the fleeting nature of ownership and make room for happiness with the things, people and time you have.” – Holiday Mathis
“I know when I buy something, fashion needs to speak to me emotionally. I look for a shoe that represents my individuality and personal style.” – Libby, from Sam & Libby shoe company
This past weekend I found out that one of my favorite “little town” stores was going out of business. I felt a little gut-punched and soul-crushed to be honest. I think that my husband, who was with me as we happened upon their unexpected going-out-of-business sale, was concerned that I might burst out in tears, in front of the other shoppers, digging through the final, few 75% off cast-offs from the store. I didn’t wail, but I was definitely crying on the inside. This store was a plant store with a unique urban edge to it. I can look around my house and see several pots, plants and accoutrements that I had purchased there, usually on date nights, because the town that the store sits in, has wonderful, low-key restaurants right by the water. This store contained things you just didn’t find anywhere else. I never left there without purchasing something which made my heart sing a little, and as a magic bonus, the item was usually tied to a little romantic memory with my husband.
I’m with Libby. I buy my fashion pieces, my jewelry, things for my home, my cars, souvenirs from my trips, definitely my shoes, because they speak to me emotionally. I delight in individuality in myself, and in others. I adore getting a glimpse of someone’s soul and overall being by the way that they dress themselves, hold themselves, comfort themselves in their homes, adorn themselves . . . . I “worship” at the places and at the feet of people that aren’t afraid to put it all out there, and who fully own who they are, and who proudly show it, for the whole world to see. And this looks different on everyone. And yet it is all so incredibly beautiful.
We all know that the only constant is change. So savor everything. Take nothing for granted. Buy the damn shoes. Wear them proudly. Wear your emotions on your sleeves. Say thank you to everything and everyone who has made your life the unique and wonderful experience that it is. Thank you, sweet little plant store and the persons who created you. You changed lives by being fully you, and your sui generis spirit lives on in a lot of homes, and gardens all over. Your emotions have been spoken and they are lovely.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
Here is the question of the day from 3000 Questions About Me:
Logic was my favorite class that I took in college. I took it to fulfill my Humanities credit requirement. It was taught out of the Philosophy department, but the class was more like figuring out math puzzles. It wasn’t a lot of writing, like I had expected, but still, I loved it. I actually looked forward to the out-of-class work. Most of my Logic class was working out proofs such as: if A=B, and B=C, then it follows that A=C. I like it when I can get out of my emotionality, and I am able to look at situations with my clear, logical mind. I like it when things make sense.
So, using my most logical part of my mind, I confidently make this statement: It is illogical to ever feel insecure in yourself. Why? Because you are one-of-a-kind. There is no one in this world who is or was, exactly the same as you. Even if you are an identical twin, it is impossible for you both to have experienced the exact same experiences, with the same exact consequences every single second of your individual lives.
No one ever says, “That’s the best Mona Lisa.” Why? Because there is only ONE authentic Mona Lisa. Now some people may not be impressed with the Mona Lisa. So what? Some people may like other paintings better. Again, so what? Some people may think that the Mona Lisa is the greatest painting that exists in this world. And again, so what? There are no other Mona Lisas in this world. There may be imitations of the Mona Lisa, but that’s just it, they are just imitations. A painting can be judged to be the closest imitation to the Mona Lisa that exists, but then that just makes that particular painting, itself – “the best imitation of the Mona Lisa.” And the Mona Lisa still stands as THE Mona Lisa.
There is no true competition. Yes, there are games in our lives that we compete in, and there are job offers that are limited to one recipient, and on Black Friday, one person may beat out you for that last doorbuster $50 HDTV. But those are just competitions experienced throughout your one unique life. No one else will have the same exact series of competitions played out in their lives. You will win some. You will lose some. So what?
When we feel insecure it brings out the worst in us, doesn’t it? Jealousy, passive aggressiveness, control, anger, meanness, pettiness, cruelty, usually comes out our own shadows when we are feeling “less than”, or badly about ourselves. Do you find it hard to be kind when you, yourself, are feeling on top of the world? Of course not! It’s easy when we are feeling great to only notice daisies and rainbows and cute puppies and cupcakes for everyone! But on a bad day, that jackass who rode by in his beautiful, brand new Ferrari probably got that “over-the-top/too flashy” car undeservedly from ill-gotten funds, right? Doesn’t he know that his Ferrari’s cost could probably feed a dozen hungry children for years and years on end?? So you are justified in snidely cutting him off, or smirking when he gets pulled over in a traffic stop, right?
Is it possible that Ferrari guy, is a self-made person who created a wonderful company out of his garage that now provides a comfortable lifestyle for hundreds of families with newly created jobs? Is it possible that Ferrari guy gives more to charities than you will even make in your lifetime? Is it possible that Ferrari guy is a spoiled rotten, trust fund baby who inherited all of his money from his great-grandfather, who was a mafia kingpin? Again, the answer to all of these questions is: so what? What has that got to do with you, Mona Lisa? You are Mona Lisa. Keep your nose in your own one-of-a-kind life, Mona. No one else gets to live it but you. What are you doing with your one and only life? You can get inspired by Ferrari guy if you want to, or you can be disgusted with him, if you want, as well. You, alone, are feeling that sense of inspiration or that pit of disgust in this moment that you are reading this sentence.
Again, I repeat my logical supposition: There is no “you” better than you. There is no “you” worse than you. You are you. You are the only you. It is illogical to ever feel insecure in yourself because there is no other “you” to compare yourself to, nor will there ever be. Even if you are cloned, it will be impossible for your clone to experience the exact set of experiences, relationships, coincidences, lucky breaks, and consequences to actions than you are experiencing in this time period. If you can see my supposition to be true, does it follow that Ferrari guy shouldn’t be a blip in your mind? Does it follow that your own authenticity is inimitable, as hard as the imitators may try? Does it make sense to try to be an imitator when you, yourself, are a one-of-a-kind treasure? Does it do good to remember that every single being you come across today, including every blade of grass that you walk on, is a one-of-a-kind treasure never to be repeated again? The Mona Lisa is protected by great, complicated security measures. Millions of people around the world spend money to spend a couple of minutes gazing at her, for maybe once in their lifetimes. All you have to do, right now, is to look in the mirror in order to see something at least, as precious and as rare as THE Mona Lisa.
Try to go through life just for today, applying my logical supposition. Is it possible that the world could appear wholly different to you with this logical lens? You may say, “So what?” And that’s fine. Your responses are uniquely yours and these responses will determine how you experience your one and only precious life, and they also will determine how others experience you. If you believe that you needn’t ever feel insecure again (because of the logical proof which shows that it is silly to do so), than your shadow side will have a much harder time popping out of your psyche, with all of the simple, beautiful, logical light shining brightly upon it.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
It always delights me when a friend, or another reader of my blog, claims one of my posts, as absolutely theirs – just the words/messages that they were meant to read at that particular moment. I firmly believe that all of us are just channels for Creative Intelligence. So, yes, I believe that it is true – if something on my blog, resonates deeply with you, the message is meant for you, and Creative Intelligence was just using my writing as a way to get the message to you, and to bring it to your conscious awareness.
There is a lot written about finding one’s purpose. The problem that arises most often with “finding one’s individual purpose” is self-acceptance. We are conditioned to believe that a certain type of person is ideal, and we try to be that “ideal” human whether it be a job title, or other titles/functions which we hold in our lives such as spouse, parent, child, sibling, friend, neighbor, congregant, group member, etc. Instead of listening to our own deepest callings and desires to do things in our own unique way, we live up to flimsy images, and not to the depths of the yearnings of our own individual hearts and souls.
As I mentioned yesterday, the flowers in our yard are particularly beautiful this spring. The blooms are bursting out proudly. The hibiscus is out-loud everywhere, the orchids are struggling to hold their enormous, healthy blooms up elegantly, and the bougainvillea went from almost-died-from-frostbite, to you-had-better-trim-me-up-soon-if-you-want-to-be-able-to-find-the-front door. All of this happened in what seemed like a matter of just a couple of days. You get the picture. My overall point is that I am so utterly grateful that all of our plants are so robustly, and proudly blooming, and being so fully and completely, the ultimate version of themselves. The combination of all of them together, by each being their individual best and brightest version of themselves, is breathtaking to behold. This is how it goes in life. It is never just one type of flower that makes an amazing garden. There is not just one dancer nor one singer who makes the whole of a sensational, Tony awarded Broadway show. There is not just one spice nor ingredient that makes an amazingly delicious dish.
Don’t be ashamed of the channel which Creative Intelligence has chosen for you. My begonias are not sad that they aren’t wildflowers. They are doing “begonia” this year like I have never seen them do it before. Be honest with yourself. What do you love to do? What are you being called to do? What activity do you lose yourself in, when you are doing it? Creative Intelligence wants to be able to pour Itself into the channel that It created you to be. Mourn what you wish you were, or you think that you should be, and put that aside. Stop being exhausted and depressed from pretending to be something that you aren’t. Be true to your own individual calling. And yes, this message is meant for YOU to read it, to absorb it, and then, to go be it.
Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
