Om Friday

Can we get an OM YEAH? #happyfriday #om #yoga #yogafam#yogateacher  #yogaclass | Yoga quotes funny, Yoga funny, Yoga quotes

Hi friends! Happy Friday! Usually on Fridays, I list three favorite things of the material world that make life a more sensual, intensified, interesting experience, for me. Lately, though, I would be okay with less intense, less visceral, more even keel experiences, how about you? In the beginning of the year, I get into cleaning out mode, so the idea of finding more “things” to add to my life, feels exhausting and smothering.

Yesterday, I took Trip, our nine-month-old Boykin spaniel puppy to a local park to play “fetch to the death.” Okay, not really to the death, but he would have been game to try. His high intensity, disorganized, unfocused puppy energy has a tendency to start working on all of our nerves, including our two older dogs, so I thought that it would be good for him to have an outlet for everything that was stirring up his insides. It turns out that the park outing was maybe needed by me, most of all.

For a good five years in my forties, I was a regular yoga practitioner. I am not sure why I got away from it (probably my frenetic need for variety and novelty), because yoga is wonderful, for the body and for the soul. Anyway, as I was driving Trip and myself over to the park, one of my favorite yoga chants came up on the play list, and starting playing over my radio. It turned out to be the perfect background music for watching my little puppy, run for joy towards a little yellow ball, again and again, with three elegant deer munching on grass, undisturbed, in the background.

Today, I am going to share this song with you all, as my only favorite for today. Get out your best hippie chic, light up a patchouli candle and let yourself sway to this chant, for as long as you need, to remind yourself, Everything is going be alright. Love, Peace, Freedom for us all. Have a delightful, tranquil, amazing weekend.

The Friday Funny: Yoga | Ramblings of the Claury

Are you passing on love, or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love. (this will be the daily mantra of the blog, for the rest of this year.)

Oh Sh*t

“Apologize when you are wrong, not when you feel insecure or embarrassed.”

I saw this quote on the internet the other day. I have touched on this subject before here at Adulting- Second Half. (when you write a blog every single day for years on end, that tends to happen. Just as my kids roll their eyes, as I repeat the “same old stories”, I see that it is happening here at the blog, too.) Still, this one bears repeating. And I won’t apologize for it.

Years ago, a friend told me that I apologize too much. She said, instead of apologizing, say, “Thank you for your patience with my repeating the same themes in my blog.” (just an example) It was advice that has stuck in my mind, for years and I try to utilize it.

When I get nervous, I repeat myself or I ask the same questions a gazillion times. Yesterday, the hot water pipes broke underneath the tile and our kitchen cabinets. Yay. About 200 times before the sun rose in the sky, I asked my husband if he was going to call a plumber. Of course, he was going to call a plumber. My husband is a responsible man, and he didn’t want this to turn into a bigger mess than it had to be, either. I know this. But unconsciously, I asked him, out loud, 200 times if he was going to call a plumber. It is my way of self-soothing. It is my way to reassure myself. The question was just a substitution for “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit.”

So, when my husband (quite understandably) lost his patience with my questioning, I did not apologize. I just explained that I understand that my nervous habit would be aggravating and I will try to work on it, but he knows, after being married to me for over 26 years, that old habits die hard. And I gave him the same explanation that I explained to you about my quirky compulsion, in the paragraph above. And then I alluded to some of his quirks, that I have chosen to live with, because the overall package of him, more than makes up for, a few little annoying idiosyncrasies that are addendums to an otherwise amazing person.

I think that we will start talking to each other again tomorrow. (wink)

Are you passing on love, or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love. (this will be the daily mantra of the blog, for the rest of this year.)

A Hole in the Bucket

Given recent events, the outcry to stop our nation’s division is getting louder and louder, but how can this be done? The reasons for the division, in the first place, come from such strong fundamentally different ideas about what the right solutions are, for so many facets of our society. My friend recently repeated what is often said to couples who are having marital problems. We need to stop thinking of each other as enemies, tearing each other to the bone, and instead, see each other as loving people, allied against the problems which we face. Perhaps this would be easier to do, if we contemplated and we realized how much more alike we all are, than we ever truly and deeply realize.

I recently read a parable that made so much sense to me. My regular readers know that I sometimes explain humanity with the idea that we are all branches, or leaves, or roots of the same tree. Sometimes, I make the analogy that we are all different cells of the same body. This new parable talks about the idea that we are all submerged buckets in a huge, vast, timeless, limitless ocean body of water. Our submerged buckets are all individual and different. The buckets are different sizes, and different colors, and different shapes. Some of the buckets are quite fancy and some are quite simple. Yet, each bucket is truly unique. Even the buckets that appear to be the same, the “twin buckets” so to speak, are submerged in a different part of the ocean, and so they are likely to have unique marks left on them, from a passing shell or a shark fin, that helps distinguish them from all of the the other buckets. In short, these buckets represent our own shells. Our shells are made up of our own living bodies and forms, plus our personalities and our egos. But interestingly, just as all of the submerged buckets are filled with the same ocean water, all of our submerged buckets, each contains inside of itself, the exact same “stuff” – soul, spirit, God, Awareness, consciousness, Love, Source, whatever you want to call “It” – essentially the stuff, the essence, the force, etc. that makes all living things “alive”, versus inanimate, unconscious things like our couches or shoes or bricks. Thus, as the ocean is inside and yet also, outside all of the submerged buckets in the parable, so is the very same Universe inside and yet also, outside, all of us and all living things. Keep in mind, all of the buckets are one-of-a-kind. They come in all arrays of colors and all forms. They have landed in different parts of the deep sea, and so they have had vastly different experiences. Some buckets are quite porous, almost like a thin membrane, and what is inside of the buckets, and what is all around the outside of these buckets, flows in and out of them, quite easily. These buckets might sometimes get labeled as “fragile and sensitive.” Some buckets are solid and thick and stay deeply rooted at the bottom of the ocean, surviving all sorts of deep water disturbances. These buckets might sometimes be described as “hardened and tough.” Some buckets have been really been put through all sorts of tests, attacked by sharp toothed fishes and steel propellers and pollution, and they have the scars to prove it. Perhaps these buckets sometimes get called “damaged.” Some buckets have been around quite some time, and they are covered with barnacles and sometimes are considered to be “set in their ways”, deeply rooted in the sand. Some of the buckets have gotten so old and so worn, that they have disintegrated, so that the part of the ocean which was once contained inside of them, has flowed back into the vastness of the stable ocean that has surrounded them, for all of their existence. The buckets are all just buckets. They aren’t good nor are they bad, they are just vehicles for the ocean water to flow into and to experience itself, in a distinct light. Each of the buckets was formed differently from a physical standpoint. Where each bucket has landed into this vast ocean, and what they have experienced in their individual places of landing, have helped to shape and to evolve them even more, into their own unique selves. If we can see ourselves as the submerged buckets, we know that our outer shells are just the form which we were born into, plus the experiences that we have gone through along the way, creating a recognizably unique person, and a colorful personality. Still, like the submerged buckets, we are all filled with the same “stuff”. And better yet, just as the ocean covers all of the submerged buckets, we are all surrounded by the very same powerful “stuff,” that is also contained inside of all of us. A lot of us have forgotten that fact. A lot of us think that we are just the shells of ourselves. A lot of us think that we are just the bucket part of ourselves, and that is when we lose all sense of our connectedness, with all that is. That is when we play small and get mean and greedy and defensive and fearful and angry and puffed up. Because really, what is a bucket compared to the vast ocean? A bucket by itself, is dwarfed by the ocean and lonesome on the shore. A bucket, by itself, is a fearful state to be in.

In yoga, people often greet each other with “Namaste.” Loosely, translated, it means, “The spirit in me, recognizes the spirit in you.” In other words, I can see past your bucket form, to all of the beauty and creation which is held inside of you, and which is also held inside of me. Maybe if we all work harder at seeing past the bucket walls, of anyone we meet, (understanding that their bucket covering was created out of their own experiences, which may have been vastly different experiences than our own experiences), we can get a glimpse of what really lies inside. Maybe by us trying to see the spirit inside of others, we can help them to remember that they are much, much more than an empty, decaying vessel, and in the same light, they can do the same for us. And then all of us can feel more confident, in the face of the challenges ahead of us, knowing that everything which we need, in order to prosper, individually and societally, is inside of all of us, and all around us, for all of eternity.

He fills heaven and earth as the ocean fills the bucket that is submerged in it, and as the ocean surrounds the bucket so does God in the universe He fills. “The heaven of heavens cannot contain Thee.” God is not contained: He contains.”

— Aiden Wilson Tozer

Are you passing on love, or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love. (this will be the daily mantra of the blog, for the rest of this year.)

Declutter Our Minds

Are you passing on love, or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love. (this will be the daily mantra of the blog, for the rest of this year.)

“You spend most of your time inside of your head. Make it a nice place to be.”- Growth Hub

This is the time of the year, that a lot of us do some decluttering in our homes. My husband went to town on his closet the other day, and he filled up a nice, big bag for Goodwill. My closet cleaning is still at the intention stage, but it is a priority – a major one, that I plan to get to, in the coming days. My friend was asking a group of us for ideas about how to decorate her shelves, after taking all of her clutter, off of them. One member of our friend group, who has exquisite tastes, was singled out for ideas. She is a self proclaimed minimalist, but what I loved the best was her answer. My lovely friend said that you should fill your shelves with what you love, and what makes you happy, because truthfully, you are the only one who sees your shelves on a regular, daily basis.

The same sentiment certainly applies to our heads, right? We are the only ones with access to our minds. The inside of our heads is sacred space, so holy that we are the only ones privy to what goes on, inside of it. Sure, we can spill out what is churning in our brains, to other people, but oftentimes, what we spill out in our conversations, and our interactions with others, is usually just a regurgitation of everything which we have allowed into our minds.

When we get on a health kick, we become super conscious about what we are eating and drinking and consuming. We get real honest with ourselves about what is good to put into our bodies, and what about our diets, needs to be laid to waste. When we declutter our drawers and our cabinets and our shelves, we often use the Marie Kondo question, “Does this item spark joy in me?” Perhaps, we should use these same methods, when decorating the insides of our heads.

I imagine if we wanted to create a real ugly devil’s den inside of our heads, we could fill our minds with every negative news piece we could find. We could fill our minds with ruminations about everything that we don’t like about our jobs, our country, and the people who annoy us. We could fuel the raging fires with our fears, and our worries, and focus our imaginations on possible upcoming catastrophes. What would a decluttered mind look like, though? What if we took it down to the studs? What if we kept open doors on both sides of our heads, so that thoughts could come in, and just as easily pass on through, keeping our minds open and breezy and clear to views which might really resonate with us, down to the true command center of our hearts, where our precious souls reside.

The older I get, the more I see simple truths. What is good for the body and is good for the soul, is good for the mind. What is happening outside of us, is often just a projection of what is happening inside of us. We frequently forget just how much power and control we really wield, in our lives. Just as we clutter up our houses, we also have the power to clean out what no longer sparks joy. Just as we fill up our bodies with junk food, we can fill them up with wholesome nutrients, instead. Just as we can obsessively click on one negative news story, or triggering social media post after another, we can stop and we can breathe, and we can clean out what does not belong in our sacred mindspace. The irony of it all, is that we are always trying to control and fix “the outsides”, but if we control what is happening inside of us, the outsides usually look a whole lot better. When we take care of our bodies, we have more energy, and we fit into our clothes better. When we take time to really feed our souls with what feels good to us, by communing with nature and people and animals and our Source, we no longer have gaping holes that we try to fill with things that clutter up our lives, or substances that hurt our bodies. When we take the time to cleanse our minds of negative thoughts and beliefs and worries, we have more wide, open space to fill our brains with wonder and awe and amazement about all of the miracles of life surrounding us. When we stay in our own lanes, and when we focus on the only triumvirate that we do have any real control over, that being our own minds, our own bodies and our own souls, the outsides just have a way of taking care of themselves. When we have an inside sense of calm and control and order, we no longer need to concern ourselves with controlling anything outside of us. Trying to control “the outsides” was just our fruitless way of trying to get that internal sense of calm and control and order for ourselves, which has been available to us, all of the time. Ironic, right?

“Everyone wants peace, inside and outside, and we would all have it if we knew how. Now we know how. It begins with you.” – Byron Katie

“Create a friendly atmosphere on the inside and outside. Live Friendly. Be a friendly person on the inside. Have the attitude it takes to be smiling internally first.” – Jeffrey Gitomer

Soul Sunday

Hi friends. I don’t think that this past full week of the new year is what any of us were aiming for, to start the year out right. These are strange times which we are going through. However, we are not alone. We are experiencing a lot of “stuff”, together. I am grateful to commune with all of you, as we navigate another year of our lives, together. My regular readers know that I dedicate Sundays to poetry. Please share your poems (they are there, in your heart – put a pen in your hand and let them flow out. You will be pleasantly surprised – “Shakespeare’s a poet, and doesn’t know it”) in my Comments section. Today I wrote this poem (I hope that you may relate, and that you can enjoy some familiarity, with me):

It Never Fails

It never fails,

Every year I find it,

That one little relic,

of the holidays past,

That I forgot to put away.

This year it was a sparkly hand towel,

In the powder room,

Depicting a Christmas tree,

Shiny, erect, hopeful and bright.

Could it be a subconscious hint?

Much like a woman who leaves her glove,

After an enjoyable evening out,

Perhaps it’s an honest mistake,

or perhaps it’s an intuitive gesture,

From something deep inside,

Trying to connect and to keep and to hold,

The magic of the moment alive,

For the entire year to come.

Lucky Find

I get a “word of the day” emailed to me every day. This week, I liked one “word of the day” so much, I put it in my journal. I like this word so much, that I am blogging about it this morning. The word is French. The word is “trouvaille”. It means “lucky find”. How fitting that this new word in my vocabulary is a lucky find for me! As I write this, Ralphie, our big ol’ goofy Labrador retriever is playing the piano. He recently discovered that he can play the piano by pushing the keys with his chin. His musical talents are a lucky find for him. (whether his new found talent turns out to be a lucky thing for us, remains to be seen – thank goodness for piano key covers) What are some of your “lucky finds” in your life? I consider my husband, and my friends, and my dogs, to be my best “lucky finds”. I have a pewter bunny bank full of lucky pennies, found as I go about my daily business. One time I found several beautiful Hermes scarves at a thrift shop, for the whopping cost of five dollars each. There are so many books that I have read over the years that turned out to be “the right book, at the right time.” They were trouvailles, for sure. Our lives are full of trouvailles, if we are willing to look for them and recognize them for what they are, and what they mean to us. I am wishing for all us, many trouvailles in the new year and beyond. Let’s focus on our trouvailles, versus our troubles.

“We are all a great deal luckier that we realize, we usually get what we want – or near enough.”– Roald Dahl

“You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from.”– Cormac McCarthy

Fuzzy Friday

I was going to share this picture with you, my readers, yesterday, but instead there was a fiasco in Washington DC that sorely needed to be addressed. I needed to get my feelings out about everything, in written form. That’s how I best process my inner emotional world – by writing. Anyway, welcome to Favorite Things Friday! On Fridays (in honor of my favorite day of the week), I typically list three favorite things, or songs, or books, or ideas, or websites, which have made my life a little more colorful and interesting and I strongly encourage you to add your favorites to my Comments section. Check out my previous Friday posts for more favorites. They can provide ideas for what to spend your holiday gift cards on. I usually use up my holiday gift cards almost immediately, every year. I tell myself that I am afraid of losing the gift cards, plus the sales are great, so I go all in. I am always amazed when people have gift cards left over from the previous decade. I am in awe of people who still have gift cards to places that already have new logos.

A few Fridays ago, I mentioned a favorite new app for my phone, called Marco Polo. In posting a video with a group of my friends, I caught the giggles and I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. I thought to myself, what a wonderful thing to have in my back pocket – a video of me, laughing. So on days, when it is hard to find something to laugh about it, I can watch myself laugh, as a reminder of brighter days. On to my favorites for today:

Chia Pets – My husband got the Bob Ross Chia Pet pictured above, for my daughter for Christmas (among other things). It has brought a lot of smiles to our family (and now hopefully to you, too). Bring back the wonderment of your childhood and buy yourself a chia pet. They grow really fast (obviously) and the chia pet will help you to make your own video of yourself, giggling, as you watch your pet grow.

S.O.A.R. – I read about this mindfulness technique recently and it has really helped me to deal with everything that is going on in our world these days. When you feel a turbulence of feelings, use this technique.

S.Stop and breathe deeply. (deep enough to make your belly rise and fall)

O. – Stay detached and observe what your feeling feels like, in a physical sense. Where does anger land in your body? What is the physical sensation of sad or bewildered?

A. – Accept your feelings. What we resist, persists. What we try to disown in us, doesn’t go away, it just often shows up in other ways, like in the form of sickness, or in sleep disturbances, or in short fuses, etc. Feelings are just feelings. It is okay to feel whatever you feel. Just accept your feelings.

R.Release and let go of that feeling. You will be surprised by how easily a feeling that has been observed and accepted, will pass on by. We experience thousands of different thoughts and a wide range of feelings every day. I always remind myself and my family, that our true essence is that of the steady blue sky. Clouds come, and they go. The clouds always, always pass on through.

Addison Weeks Jewelry – I have probably shared this designer with you before, but I keep going back for more pieces of this jewelry. (My husband bought me my first piece of Addison Weeks jewelry, as a gift, a few years ago. He probably rues the day.) This year, I have fallen in love with Addison Weeks’ chains and charms that are interchangeable and look so lovely, layered together. My favorite thing about Addison Weeks jewelry is that it always incorporates natural crystals and stones. I love to wear nature. It calms me. It grounds me. Wearing a piece of what has come from the earth, feels right and Addison Weeks allows me to do this, is a fashionable, eye-catching way.

Happy Friday, my dear friends and readers!! Have a lovely weekend! See you tomorrow.

Heal.

I have no words that haven’t already been expressed about yesterday’s horrible display at the Capitol building. I am deeply saddened, disgusted, pained, mortified, flattened, outraged, etc. by the actual events, by how the events were handled, and what this display really shows about the state of our country. This is not the United States of America I was raised to love and to cherish and to respect and to revere. This is not the United States of America that so many of my dear family members were willing to wager their lives on, by serving in our military. We must find a way back to our United selves. It has become imperative.

How do we do this? We heal ourselves. Yesterday, Congress did a good job of rising to the occasion. Can you imagine how utterly terrifying their experience of being bombarded on, by an angry mob had to be? To have to cower, and to wear gas masks and to remain in a locked down room for hours? Yet, our senators and our congressmen and congresswomen, rose above their fears and they did the right thing, together, for the unified vision of our democracy. Republicans, Democrats, Independents from every unique state of our nation, overcame their trauma, to do the right thing for our country. They became united because their trauma woke them into the pure reality of how fragile our precious, hard won, democracy really is, in the face of it all.

A couple of blogs ago, I wrote about a question that I am planning on focusing on, in my own life, this year. Am I passing on love, or am I passing on pain? There is a lot of searing pain in this country. And a lot of this pain is justified. The pain comes from every sector, every race, every community, every generation, every family. It is our job to heal our own pain, so that the pain of our country, this deeply wounded chasm, starts to heal, on a macro-level. We must help each other to heal, by passing on love. We each can only heal ourselves. And each of us knows best how to do our own peaceful healing, with the help of our own sacred higher power. We must support each other in our healing, versus fueling the fires of hatred, which only keeps the disease of division, alive in this co-creation of our ever-evolving country.

Other countries may mock us. They may be scolding us and secretly, relishing in our current upheaval. But deep down, they are trembling in pain and in fear. They are as mortified as we are, about the state of our division. The United States is a beacon of hope, all over the world. No one can deny this. No one can afford to lose hope. It is our job to heal ourselves, so that hope can remain, for us, and for everyone around this globe.

My solemn prayer is that our lawmakers, our business heads, our political leaders, our religious guides, our major media stations, only have one major purpose in mind, in going about their duties, going into this new year and beyond. That purpose is to make all actions, and all decisions, and all priorities, about healing us back into a united state. In the meantime, the rest of us have the job to heal our own minds and our own bodies and our own spirits, by acknowledging our own pains, our own angers, our own grievances, and finding healthy, serene ways to heal these pains that lie within ourselves. There is nothing stronger, and more radiant than a group of healed and healthy people, united in the vision that our forefathers so carefully laid out for this country.

Remember, you must heal yourself. Don’t be so arrogant that you think there are no areas in yourself, that don’t need some cleaning up. We all have these areas, and it is an inside job to recognize these wounded places in ourselves, and to bring them into the light. Then, as we uncover some pain, we can ask others for guidance and help, and we can be there for each other, to help to heal each other, instead of just acting out our pain, in unconscious, reckless desperation. No human leader is going to heal you. You don’t need someone outside of yourself to heal you. You don’t need conditions outside of yourself, in order to be healed. People think if a certain person is in office, or if a certain agenda is being carried out, then they will be healed and happy. On a personal level, people think that if they have a certain level of money, or a certain relationship, then they will be happy. It doesn’t work that way. Happiness is an inside job. Those of us who believe in God, believe that God helps us with our healing, but there are no conditions outside of ourselves, that are required for God to help us. We don’t have to be a certain religion, or be at a certain level of “good” for God to help us. That is what is meant by God’s grace. God never leaves us. It is my belief that God is inside each and every one of us, deeply imbedded in our souls, quietly, calmly, peacefully sitting in the deepest seats of our hearts. Let’s find that part of our hearts, and ask to be guided to healing. It is our sacred duty to ourselves, to our families and to our nation, to heal.

Healed individuals lead to healed nations. Our nation needs to heal. Let us each do our own part. Let’s keep the highest vision of this United States, alive and well, by each of us doing our own part, in our own lives. It is simple: Pass on love to others, and pass on love to yourself. Heal your pain, and pass on love. Pass on love.

Patience is a Virtue

“How many opportunities of being happy do you miss by giving all of your attention to what brings you angst?” – (Valencia, Twitter)

I got a little triggered yesterday. I went on to my Nextdoor app (which is social media for your local neighborhoods, often used to share local news or to sell items or to report lost pets, etc.) and the thread that was bursting at the seams, considering our local neighborhood news, was the angst over not being able to get a vaccine yet. In Florida, anyone over the age of 65, is now eligible to get a vaccine to prevent the coronavirus, if it is available. And the system for getting the vaccine is flawed. The phone lines are jammed. The technology for setting the appointments blew up, and people were having hissy fits the likes you’ve never seen. I am sure that there were a lot of people, while writing hysterical commentary on the Nextdoor app, were having their blood pressures go through the roof. And let’s remember, the vaccine just got approved for public use, on December 14th.

It’s okay to be upset. The system for getting the vaccine certainly has to be improved, and it will be. Just like how obtaining masks, or getting coronavirus tests, or even, acquiring toilet paper, in the beginning of this pandemic was next to mission impossible, I now own a pile of masks in every color, shape and form, I can obtain toilet paper at any level of softness that I want, and I could get a coronavirus test today, from more than one place, and know the results in fifteen minutes. This is America. We are inventive. We are forward thinking. We are capitalists. It is in everyone’s best interest to get the vaccine, especially in the interests of the moneyed powers that be. Therefore, once the kinks are worked out, I have no doubts that everyone who wants the vaccine, will get one, sooner than any of us think.

We are like a football team who is playing against a team that we have never played before. We are having to make new plays in the middle of the game, and then we are having to make adjustments when our plays don’t work. We are having to play with, and against players, who have all different level of skills, and unique personal agendas. There are going to be a lot of mistakes. There are going to be a lot of unfair plays, and a lot of missed calls. Some people have been seriously hurt, and others still are going to get hurt. At the end of the game, the coaches are really going to have to study the tape, to see what went right and what went wrong, in order to play a better, more solid game in the future. Some of these coaches may be shown to be underperforming, and they will be replaced. Still, we are going to win this game against the coronavirus. The momentum is with us in a major way. We have a vaccine. We have more than one vaccine . . . . . in less than a year!!!!

During the long year of 2020, we often claimed that the good that came out of our experience, is that we were learning the value of patience. We we learning not to take the people, things, and experiences that we were blessed with for granted, by acting entitled. We claimed to have learned how strong and able, we really are, in tough circumstances. How quickly we forget our “lessons” sometimes! We will prevail if we keep calm and carry on using safe, social distancing practices just a little while longer. Let’s be team players and see this game through to victory.