Soul Sunday

Good morning. Welcome to poetry day on the blog. I like to think of poetry as the secret code of our souls. In order to write poetry, you have to put your most sensible, guarded, orderly part of yourself aside and let the poetry write itself. It is the one form of communication that you come to as blankly and open, as someone else who is just reading it for the first time. How many times have you written a poem and thought, “Oh wow, I wrote that?? That’s what is stirring deep inside of me??” Get to know yourself better and write yourself a poem today. I wrote this poem about a lovely bridal shower which I attended yesterday:

“The Elders Table”

We watched the beautiful young bride excitedly unpack each gift,

Clean, shiny, unmarked, powerful tools to create the sustenance of a fairy tale.

We reminisced of the days when we sat in her seat and her spotlight.

So full of hope, and promise, and energy, and expectant excitement.

We marvel at the versions of ourselves who long ago, once sat in her seat,

Radiant and innocent and ambitious and determined and clear.

We still have many of the tools showered upon us, on those days, long ago when we were the brides.

The tools are well-used, scarred with marks, some almost broken, but determined to continue their purpose.

We, who are intently watching the bride, are now the continuance of the women who bestowed these gifts upon us.

And it is only now, that we deeply understand why it was so imperative for our elders to impart these gifts upon us.

The gifts weren’t just pots and pans and knives and nightgowns and a little wad of money for extras.

They were the tools that helped sustain the hope, and the excitement, and the energy and the promise,

When life’s storms were determined to make their marks, sometimes gashes, all to test our tenacity and plans.

Would the inner gentle flower of our young bride’s heart wilt under the load of life?

Or would the dried, sustained, circle wreath arrangement of our elders, be our borrowed strength,

When we decided to fondly pick up a remembered tool, from a lovely little bridal celebration, and to calmly use the implement, so to carry on with life . . . . .

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.

Not the Bride Friday

My friends and I were having a text conversation this morning, talking about the stories that we tell ourselves about what other people are thinking about us, and what is going to happen in the future, and we let these stories grow and grow, especially if we are creative, imaginative, emotional, anxious people. We can easily be our own worst enemies. We have the meanest of “mean girls” inside of our own heads who are experts at torturing and manipulating us. My friend said that when her daughter finds herself getting carried away with worries like this, her daughter says to herself, “I am not the bride.” This is a reminder that we aren’t the focus of other people’s thoughts and attention, nearly as much as we think that we are, and when we put our worries into the wake-up-and-smell-the-coffee, don’t-be-a-narcissist, “I am not the bride” context, this is the thought that follows: “Ewww. No thank you. I don’t care to be a bridezilla. Sit down and shut up, stupid mean girl in my head.” So today, on Favorite Things Friday, my new favorite mantra is “I am not the bride.” I think that this will make for a nice, in-the-moment, easy-going weekend.

My bonus favorite for this Favorite Things Friday is a jewelry company called The Pink Reef (HELLOPINKREEF.COM). Their jewelry is colorful, and feminine, and mostly statement pieces, featuring large hand-painted flowers and butterflies. I believe that Barbie would buy jewelry from The Pink Reef. And clearly, based on the blockbuster movie sales, we all love Barbie.

Friends, you are not the bride (hopefully you’ll only ever be a bride (or groom) once or twice in your whole lives – even Elizabeth Taylor was only the bride eight times in her entire lifetime). Let that peaceful thought carry you throughout this weekend, freely doing whatever you please to live an enjoyable, in-the-moment, full of awe experience, all weekend long, without ever needing the approval of others. Free yourself to enjoy the festivities without any concerns about being in the spotlight. Delight in shutting your “inner meanie” down.

Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.