Are you passing on love or are you passing on pain? Heal your pain and pass on love.
“Best first day of school photo ever!!” – Rex Masters (Twitter)
“So long, partner.” – Woody, saying farewell to Andy in Toy Story 3
Don’t you just love how little kids’ backpacks are almost as big as they are? And this sweet little boy has the matching Marvel lunchbox, to boot! He’s ready to go!
I’ll never forget the day that I saw Toy Story 3 in the movie theater with all of my children. Toy Story 3 is about when the main character, Andy, is now all grown up and leaving the nest for college. My eldest son was 14 at the time, and this was honestly the first time that it really, completely hit me, in an deeply emotional sense, that all of my four children were going to leave our house, for their own adult lives, someday, too. (It certainly didn’t help that on that very day, I had also found out that close friends of ours were moving several states away. Little did I know at that time, that our family also would be moving away to a different state, soon after. Isn’t it funny how life works?) Anyway, the loss and the melancholy that I was feeling while watching Andy say good-bye to his Mom and to his beloved toys, was a tad overwhelming. I remember burying my face in the popcorn bucket, praying that my kids wouldn’t notice my tears and choked sobs. That buttered movie theater popcorn, probably tasted extra wet and salty that day. And hopefully, extra delicious. (It was coated in love.)
I have sort of gotten used to the good-byes, and the new starts, these days. (as much as a mother can) Last week, I helped to move our youngest son, who is a college student, into his fraternity house (It was easily the cleanest that I’ll ever see that place.) He’ll live there all year. It was also my daughter’s first full week of her senior year in high school, and this past weekend, we celebrated the start of my middle son’s medical school experience with his “white coat ceremony”, where he got his “official” white coat with his name embroidered on it. My eldest son, who is a grown adult living on his own with his great job in the technology sector, graciously helped to cheer on his younger siblings, as he always has done. Our eldest son has always been an amazing “lead dog.” So this was my long winded way of saying that our family is finally settled into our fall routine. And that feels really good to me. As a woman who has been a mother for twenty-five years, I’ve learned to live by the school calendar. I like to feel settled into a routine. I feel like I can breathe more soundly now, knowing that each of my children has “a place, and a plan.” Fall always feels more secure and organized than summer. I welcome the change that fall brings to me and to our family, after experiencing hot, adventurous, lazy, and sometimes even erratic summers. Summer can be scattering. Fall is formulated. I welcome the sense of order and structure that Autumn brings back into our lives. I wonder when all of our children are completely on their own, if I will still experience the change of seasons, and how it affects my daily routine, as profoundly as I do now? It will be interesting to see.
“But the thing that makes Woody special, is he’ll never give up on you … ever. He’ll be there for you, no matter what.” – Andy, sharing with his mother about Woody’s importance in his life.